Shattered Reality
by Chimerean
Summary: Katelyn Shepard has a history of failing. So, when she pulls two women from an abandoned mine overrun with husks she promises herself not to have her history repeat itself. But it's not that simple and the women know that possibly, the biggest threat to the galaxy is not the Reapers but Shepard herself. Colonist/War Hero Femshep. Rated T for bad language. SI.
1. Prologue

_From the writer's pen: Almost year ago in a desperate attempt to write something for NaNoWriMo we started this project for fun. Perhaps because it was NaNo, the plot soon escalated out of control and it became considerably bigger than either of us originally planned on. Now, with more than a novel length's amount of words, we decided to post it here. We hold no illusions to its grandeur. It's certainly not in the calibre of what some of us are used to writing, being typical – 150k words in 30 days NaNoWriMo style. But, it's been a journey and we'd like to share it._

_A new chapter will be posted every Monday as life and all its turns allows us._

_For more information on topics and information __broached __in this – specifically the Myers and Briggs personality models which we refer to quite often, please feel free to go to our profile. _

**Prologue**

_**A moment.**_

Helena went down without warning, crashing down hard and feeling an immediate pain in her right shoulder. Yet even as she cried out in surprise, she moved. They had been moving for so long that she wasn't going to stop now. Not now, in this moment.

But she couldn't move. Even as she pushed herself up there was a triumphant cry and then _it_ pounced on her. It was far heavier than she was; its weight bearing her down hard. Helen let out a yell of frustration, but it turned to pain as the husk's claws tore across her back again and again, slashes of white pain and agony trailing down her nerves. She hit at it with her elbow, trying to buck it off her back. She had moment to think that she was going to be paralysed; that it was going to tear through her spinal cord. Then she realised that she was going to die. And that was even worse. She tried to reach for the gun, to get turn herself around but she couldn't even as it bit into her shoulder, its cool, metallic-like skin brushing against what was left of hers.

And then, then she heard a twin to her cry. Yet it wasn't in pain, but pure animal fury. The weight from her back shifted abruptly and she turned around just in time to see Rinn tear the husk from her back. She moved with a speed belying her size, belying the awkwardness with which her friend normally moved and the pain that she must've been in. The dark haired young woman had dropped her shotgun and tore into the husk with her hands. Fists rained down on the creature's face and chest and even the bloody wound on Rinn's leg, that _bloody damned wound_, didn't stop her from throwing the creature on the ground with a cry and crushing its head with her foot. Two more husks charged at her and she managed to grab one before it could pounce on her and practically tore its head from its shoulders.

Helena, having turned on her side and still lying down, shot the second.

And that was it. There were no more.

Turning on her back and trembling, frightened, yet angry, so angry, Helena tried to push herself up, tearing her eyes away from her black-haired friend for a second, who stood where she was, panting just as loudly with blood pouring down her leg. The pressure bandage that Helen had put on earlier had fallen off. Helena swallowed nauseously and looked up at the ceiling, her eyes jumping to the vents. _Should've thought of that,_ she thought as she tried to push herself up, wiping some of her red hair from her face. _Should've fucking thought of that._

_Shepard won't come for us. _

Growling at herself, ignoring her body's protest, Helen tried to push herself up again despite the pain in her back. her right arm fet sluggish and useless. Yet she forced herself, _screamed_ at herself that she _could_ get up on her own and that she _could_ do better. That this mistake, this death trap, lay on her hands. She tried to get up… But couldn't. Her legs refused to work.

Then Rinn was there – towering over her. Her friend was one of the few people taller than she was, bigger and possibly stronger. They had never pitted their strength against each other.

They had spoken very little to each other since becoming trapped. There had been no time and they had said what they could say, which was at times more than the other had wanted to hear. And there had been so little time. She remembered, briefly, standing in a corridor with the other people and then she remembered running towards the door.

_Help me,_ she had asked a man moving to run past her... _Help me..._

It had been futile. Her hope... Everything.

And Shepard hadn't come as she had hoped, _prayed_ that she would.

As Rinn towered above her, their gazes met and Helena could feel her anger.

_I told you so,_ her friend's green eyes said, but she didn't utter a word. Helena didn't know what to say to her. Would apologising cut it? She didn't think so. Somehow she expected Rinn to turn away from her, yet surprisingly, her friend bend down slightly and held out her hand. Although it was shaking, there was still a surprising amount of strength left in it as Helen gave her own hand and was hauled to her feet.

Their ragged breathing was the only sound in the room, the husks momentarily silenced. _Until the next wave comes._

As soon as she was able to stand, Helen let go of her hand and stepped back, away from Rinn. She could feel the hot blood pouring down her back and in one, insane moment of clarity, realised that she shouldn't turn away from Rinn. Not with all the blood.

_Why isn't it hurting? Shock?_

Looking around again for any more assailants and seeing Rinn do the same, she spotted what looked like a janitor's jacket lying over one of the crates and carefully moved towards it, turning around to put it on only when she knew that Rinn wasn't looking. Then she turned back to her friend and started to speak, her words cut short when the door slid open and the boxes that they had piled in front of it flew away.

They reacted immediately moving closer together again as Rinn grabbed a broken chair and Helena tried to raise her gun. Her right shoulder and her back flared up in agony and she had to drop her hand, but quickly shifted it to her left. She had a brief, insane image of Lara Croft and used that madness to push away the wild fear and pain that she felt.

There were two people who had come into the room and, if it had not been for the delay that she had had with her shoulder, Helen would've fired on them. But her delay had also given her the time to get some clarity. She should've been happy, even _relieved_ to see Commander Shepard and Miranda Lawson take point by the door, but as it was, their arrival ignited a fresh wave of anger and Helena barely had time to stop herself from shouting at them.

_Where the hell have you been?_

The _where_ escaped her lips, but it was interrupted when Miranda yelled, clutching what looked like the heavy canon pistol.

"Drop the gun!"

Clearly she didn't think Rinn's chair was a threat. Helena glared at her, her anger blinding her to all reason, and stepped in between them to shield her friend.

"Fuck you!" She snapped and tightened her grip on the gun, levelling it to Miranda's pistol. She had no intention of shooting the Cerberus officer, but she held no such hesitations to the woman's gun. "Drop yours!" The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them. She saw their madness. She knew that she was outnumbered and outgunned by two armoured women, one of which was a biotic, but she didn't care. Nobody just shouted orders at her, especially not when they _should've_ been there hours ago, protecting them from the very creatures that now lay dead around them. "You can't ask me to drop my gun! You weren't here!"

Shepard moved and Helena immediately turned to look at her. Their eyes met across the distance and for a moment, Helena held her breath even though she tightened the grip on her gun. Her stomach tightened, but Shepard looked away and the moment was gone. There was no flare of recognition. Nothing. She knew suddenly without a doubt that this wasn't her Shepard. It made her clutch her gun even tighter. If this Shepard was a Vanguard...

"Everybody just calm down!" The Shepard shouted in Jennifer Hale's voice. "Miranda, stand down. You two..." Again, the woman turned her gaze on Helena, but it was unfamiliar eyes. Even her features looked different and Helena suspected that it had nothing to do with the transition from a 3D computer image to real life. She did look vaguely familiar, but Helena wasn't in the space to debate it. She was angry, _so_ angry with this woman, her Shepard or not. They had almost died. _Died_. They'd been holed up here for hours and _Shepard_ wanted them to be calm about it?!

"Just relax," Shepard continued talking, her voice dropping to a soothing undertone. "Please, we're not going to hurt you. We're here to help."

Behind her, Helena heard a funny breath from Rinn. It was the faintest exhale. Tight. Shaking. She hadn't expected Rinn to talk, but her friend breathed suddenly in a voice barely audible.

"Who _are _you?"There was something in Rinn's voice that pulled away her anger. The horror and awe. Helen had to fight against the urge to turn back and look at her, because it would mean that she'd lose sight of the two women before her.

Shepard had no trouble ignoring her still drawn gun and turned her green gaze on Rinn.

"Katelyn," she said. "Commander Katelyn Shepard of the Alliance."

The chair came down hard and suddenly Rinn wasn't holding onto it but rather using it to hold herself up. Helena finally tore her gaze away from the two and glanced back at her friend. She wore a look of excruciating pain, clearly keeping her full weight on her uninjured leg. Yet when Helena looked at her, she also got the impression that her surrender to the pain was perhaps an escape from something far more complex. She started to reach out to steady Rinn, her mind reeling belated.

_Katelyn. Katelyn Shepard. _

She went pale suddenly and realised why Rinn was reacting the way she was.

It was _her_ Shepard. The indoctrinated one.

Her heart missed a painful beat and she turned around in an instant, again pointing her pistol at the two women, stopping them where they had rushed forward to assist them.

"Shepard's dead," she breathed, her mouth dry and her chest tight. "Stay where you are."

_Of course it's her. Of course she's not dead. _But she had to hide what they knew. She had to... Alyssa's mind was reeling and she couldn't focus. Katelyn Shepard. Slave to the reapers. Indoctrinated.

_No._ Her body jerked as she tried to keep herself from throwing up and she had to blink several times to clear her vision.

Katelyn gave her a cautious look and held up her hands. "It's complicated but, I'm not," she started to explain. "Please, lower your weapon. Let us have a look at your injuries. We will take you with us."

Shepard never stopped looking at them but Miranda shifted and turned to her Commander.

"Commander, we don't have time for this," she said, her tone clear with impatience. "This place is overrun with husks. We have to get out of here." Her ice blue eyes glanced to Helen. "I suggest that they either come with us, or take their chances with the bomb that Mordin's planting. There might be other survivors more keen on being rescued."

Helena had a suicidal urge to tell Miranda that they'd take their chances with the bomb, but then she felt a light hand on her shoulder and turned back to see Rinn give her a pale, but pointed look. She didn't say anything but her meaning was clear.

Helena looked at her for a moment, meeting Rinn's gaze before she finally grimaced and slowly lowered her gun. For the first time, both the new women seemed to relax a little.

"They've left," Helen said bitterly. "And died. We're all that's left."

Shepard had crossed the distance between them and, as Helena moved out of her way to avoid coming in contact with her, the commander knelt next to Rinn to look at her leg.

"Can you run?" She asked, looking up at the injured woman. Rinn had a look of horror on her face that could not be described in any words. Yet she nodded and pulled away when Shepard took a hypodermic from her one armour pocket.

"It's medigel," Shepard said, but Rinn didn't allow her to come any closer. Helena meanwhile had returned her attention to Miranda and, although she didn't pull the pistol on her again, she wished that she could. She didn't like the look of displeasure that the woman had on her mouth and she found it difficult to read. When their gazes met across the distance Helena could feel Miranda's cold calculation as she weighed her. As one, both their grips seemed to tighten on their pistols and neither broke away from the other's gaze.

"I'm fine," Rinn's words broke the spell as she joined Helena's side. Seeing that her attempt to provide aid was futile, Shepard stood up and picked up her own gun again, her piercing gaze travelling over both of them.

"Let's go then," she said. "Our shuttle's waiting."

She pushed past them and went to the door, where she stood there waiting, looking at them expectantly. Miranda didn't move at all and Helen could suddenly see, very clearly in her mind's eye, that their intention was to have them run between them, with Shepard taking the lead and Miranda covering their backs.

_Or Shepard's..._

She didn't want to feel relief; she didn't want to feel as if she had just been saved. Helen wanted to be angry for just a moment longer, for just a second longer, but it was difficult.

_It's almost over,_ she thought. _But then of course, it's only just begun._


	2. Chapter 1

_Fact: National Novel Writing Month starts on the 1__st__ of November. For those who feel they can (or who would like to try) write 50,000 words in one month. Now is the time to sign up. Link in profile._

**Chapter 01**

_**So, have you planned anything for NaNoWriMo yet?**_

Helena looked at the words, musing over them for a second before she shrugged to herself and typed back in a hurry.

_Plan? I don't know how to plan myself out of a paper__bag._

There was a pause which allowed her a moment or two to look at her own work. She grabbed at a few of the sentences that were drifting around in her head and, like a tetris game, tried to fit them into the scene correctly. She never planned in her writing. It wasn't something that she _did_. She didn't know how. The worlds her mind created were in her head, always available, but strangely reluctant to be put to paper. She had long since given up trying to make sense of it and chose simply to let it all run its course. When she was unable to let the scene that she as working with do the same, she gave up and returned to her chat screen.

_(Chuckles) _The reply read. _Do you know what you're going to write about at least? _

Helena shrugged to herself, but didn't note the action. _Words,_ she wrote. _Lots of them._

She left it there and returned to her writing. She wasn't being difficult, she just... didn't know what to write. Stories had always come naturally to Helena, though she had spend a lot of time shaping her writing into something that was mildly useful. She had never had any formal training, always believing that stories had a rhythm which, if gotten wrong, would eventually destruct the plot before the writing ever saw the light of day. If the characters were good, she could write for hours.

If they weren't, she didn't and moved on.

It was a frighteningly simple idea for someone who had spent her life being as complicated as a person could be. In that sense, Helena admired Rinn though she knew that her friend probably had to work twice as hard at any word that she produced. Her writing had structure, mostly, and by the time that she sat down to write something – after miles of paperwork and hand drawn notes – she knew exactly where she was going.

Helena rarely did.

She flipped back to the screen, her gaze scanning the chat lines. The reply had been very brief.

_Save some for the rest of us._

Rinn was working on a new story - one partially suggested by Helena though she had not taken the idea any further. Rinn, however, had absolutely shot away with it. It was an the idea that the red head herself didn't want to explore: That Shepard might not be cut out for her role and that the Mass Effect world, torn apart by its creators in the few final agonising minutes of the last game's end, might be in danger from the very person that was fate bound to save it.

_No,_ Helena thought – thinking about her own unbending Shepard, who always did the right thing. No matter what the cost on herself and, in a sense, on others. _Don't want to think about that at all. Besides, I have my own story to write..._

* * *

**After another harrowing elevator ride which took them to the ****top**** of the facility, they started weaving through the maze of corridors to get back to the main door. **Helen could see that it was becoming more and more difficult for Rinn to move. Her leg was clearly leaving her in agony and it was a struggle for her to put her full weight on it. Every time she did so, she came ever closer to falling. But she pushed on, because Shepard was _here_. Helena knew that her own shoulder was buggered, though she tried very hard to hide it. She could flex her elbow but all movement from her shoulder's side was either too excruciating or impossible.

_Fuck you,_ she thought as she leapt over a husk that Shepard had shot at point blank. _Fucking monsters._

"Shepard!"

Miranda's cry held some alarm and Helen stopped immediately to see the biotic rush forward to help Rinn. Her friend had fallen over this time, but was already struggling to get up, her eyes wide with fear and self-loathing. It was the same look she had worn in the corridor when... Helena shuddered and quickly joined Miranda who was helping Rinn up. The biotic could easily pull her friend's arm over her shoulder despite the few muttered protests from Rinn. Helena quickly motioned her away, her mouth dry and her breathing ragged. She was incredibly nauseous and had to focus not to throw up and make the situation messier than it already was.

There was no harshness in her voice this time as she motioned Miranda away again, as the woman had not responded immediately. "I'll help her," Helen said. "You have to fight." She hated the fear in her own voice, but it helped her because Miranda nodded immediately and stepped back, looking around the corridor. Helen met Rinn's gaze and stepped up to her side.

"Put your arm around my shoulder," she said. She didn't want to show Rinn that she couldn't lift up her own shoulder and so pretended that the gun in her right hand prevented her. "I'll help you."

Rinn gave her a look which she had seen before and not too long ago. "Helen..." she started, but her friend waved her off and stepped right up against her.

"We've been through this before," Helena said in mock harshness as she put her left arm around Rinn's waist. "Come on." She lowered her voice. "We need to talk. And quickly."

Rinn grudgingly put her arm over Helen's shoulder and the weight of it almost made her cry. None the less, she dropped the pistol unceremoniously and reached for her wrist.

"Can it wait?" Her pale friend hissed.

Helen barked a laugh, she couldn't help herself and said in an almost sing-song voice. "Oh, no, I don't think it can." They started moving again, slower this time. "We won't be able to talk to each other on the Normandy. EDI." She spoke in a harsh whisper that she hoped neither of their rescuers could hear.

Helen couldn't see Rinn's features, but she heard her pained breathing. "Forgot about that."

"Hmm," Helena said. "What are we going to tell them?" She had been so focused on Shepard saving them that she had neglected to plan out what on earth they were going to do when the woman actually arrived. _See, completely unable to plan myself out of a paper bag._ Rinn on the other hand had been so... She cut her line of thought off and grimaced, tightening her hand's grip on her friend's arm.

Rinn didn't say anything for a few moments, then grimaced. "Assistants work, as they said we would do...when we came," Rinn breathed beside her. "If they download... logs... they'd see we're new. We won't... have much to tell."

Helen nodded, but couldn't push away the sick pit of worry in her stomach. _What was the source of it?_ She thought as she stared at Shepard's back. _With a little bit of imagination,_ she decided, _Katelyn Shepard looked like the new default Shep. And why wouldn't she? Rinn had liked the way she looked._

She hadn't, not really and her Shepard had always been custom. She had used the same face, over and over again. Because in her mind, there was only one Shepard.

Well... Maybe two. Or three. But... still.

"And if they ask us where we want to go from here?" she said. "What do we say? If they ask us about our history?" _She needed to make sure that their stories coincided. Rinn wasn't good at lying and..._

She almost stumbled and accidentally bumped against Rinn's leg. Her friend grinded her teeth together and tightened the grip on her shoulder.

"Does it matter right now, Lena?" she hissed, breathing through her nose. "Slavery? Alien abduction? All of the above and more... For fuck's sake, we need to get to the Normandy first." Helen wanted to glare at her, a new flash of old anger threatening to bubble to the surface. Yet she pushed it back slowly. _She's in pain,_ she thought. _And she's as freaked out as I __am__. It's all... This will fade. It will_.

She sniffed and tried to lighten the mood as they were suddenly forced to crouch in a corridor, while Miranda and Shepard fought off a wave of husks that had come down the corridor towards them.

"We just need to make sure that our stories coincide," she pointed out as they pressed themselves against the wall. Rinn breathing was ragged and Helena could see now that she hardly had any weight on her leg.

"Then we don't say anything," Rinn snapped. "We act traumatised. Won't be much of an act."

_No,_ Helena thought. _It wouldn't._

She grimaced and looked at the progress of the two women ahead of them. She and Rinn had been there before, in this corridor. Like they were now, one propped up by the other...

"We just keep it simple then," Helena said and tried to swallow down a fresh set of nausea. "Tell the truth of everything on the base. You don't say anything about me, I don't say anything about you. That way there will be only one story floating around... I mean, if this was a story..."

Rinn bowed her head and clutched her leg. "It's not."

_Not mine,_ Helena thought darkly, but brightened when she had an idea. From the corridor, Miranda bid them to start moving again so she took Rinn's arm over her shoulder.

"If they want details, we can say we've been down on our luck," she said softly. "Took a quick job, first time out in space. Not very glamorous and we didn't really know what we were signing up for. Or we leave them to make their own conclusions."

At Rinn's doubtful look, Helena murmured something that shouldn't be repeated and looked up, still overwhelmed by a sense of deja vu. "There's the door," she said and could not stop herself from shuddering. "Open now."

"Thank god," Rinn breathed and Helen heard the voice from her audio book whisper Stephen King's words in her head.

_Say God, say God Bomb..._

There were two figures waiting for them beyond the door. A tall one, a turian and another that almost made Helena cry.

Mordin.

_I am the very model of a scientist salarian..._

"Shepard!" Garrus barked. "Hurry! We don't have much time!"

"We found survivors!" Katelyn yelled back. "Get the shuttle ready!"

They ran into darkness and through the courtyard beyond. Helen could not help but wish that they found some bodies of the others there and although she knew she should've been disgusted with herself, _because these were real people,_ she wasn't.

_Damn them for leaving us,_ she thought bitterly as they raced to the shuttle, Garrus a few paces ahead so that he could leap into the pilot's seat. _Damn them all._

She didn't let go of Rinn until they were at the shuttle. Mordin climbed in after Garrus and held out his hand to them. They were both so caught up moving with the group that Rinn instinctively held out hers and allowed him to pull her up. Helena scrambled in as Mordin settled her friend and received a friendly push from either Shepard or Miranda.

The two women followed in together.

"Get us out of here, Garrus!" Katelyn snapped in the direction of the corridor. "Mordin, how much time do we have?"

The scientist said something that Helena didn't catch as she slumped down next to Rinn. Her friend looked terrible, gasping for breath now that she had come to a stop. Her cheeks had gone an almost translucent pallor and her hands were nearly skeletal from the force she was applying on her leg. Helena wanted to have a look at it, but Miranda shoved her aside without much grace.

"Give me space," the Normandy's XO barked. "I'll have a look."

Helena opened her mouth to protest, then stopped herself and bit her lip. It was hard sometimes, fighting with herself, fighting with her own anger and temper. She always resisted before she gave, it was so instinctive that... She felt her body shudder suddenly and she looked away, unable to deal with the fact that she was seeing the _actual_ Miranda Lawson in front of her. She had to take a few steadying breaths of her own as she looked around the shuttle as it rumbled to life, tipping slightly as Garrus flew upwards. In a sense, it felt appropriate that they would leave the planet in this small carrier.

Seeing as it was one very similar that had brought them here.

* * *

**Consciousness.**

Helena took a deep breath and looked around her, the steady hum of machinery confusing her. She thought of her fish tanks and considered whether she had forgotten to turn off the filter. Then she realised that she was sitting upright and wondered whether she had fallen asleep at her desk. It took a moment or two for her brain to catch up with her surroundings and, when it did, she felt... confused.

She was in compartment with several other people, all sitting around comfortably in various stages of consciousness. It was quiet, save for the occasional cough and the steady hum that had dragged her out of sleep.

_Sleep?_ She thought and shifted, feeling the tight press of a strap against her shoulder. _Did I sleep?_

She couldn't remember and felt the stirrings of alarm. She had no idea where she was. She shifted in her chair and tried to look around her, her hand fumbling for the release of the strap around her body. _A seatbelt?_

"Sorry..." A muttered response came from beside her when she brushed against it and when she looked, Helena finally saw a familiar face, blinking warily.

"Erinn," she said and began to feel a bit easier. "I think I'm dreaming."

Her friend looked at her in surprise, then in bewilderment as she looked around her. Helena expected her fears to be eased, for her to question the notion as people often did in dreams, but she didn't. Instead her hands reached to grasp the strap around her chest before it went to her jeans where she pressed her palms firmly into her thigh, her fingers smoothing over the rough fabric.

"Lena..." She started and drew silent, her green eyes scanning the area with bewilderment rising in them like a high tide. Helena looked at her, felt her fear and sought to ease her friend's mind a little.

"Hi," she said and tried to smile, but Rinn was having none of it.

"I don't..." She started, not responding to the greeting. "Where..." Her hands pressed down firmly, then clenched into fists. "How did we get here?"

_How?_ Helena thought. There can hardly be any other explanation...

She sniffed and shrugged, once again looking around the room. There were other people of both genders, mostly a year or two older or a year or two younger with them, some sleeping, some reading. None of them seemed concerned at all. And they certainly didn't notice them, for all their fidgeting. Helena almost felt as if she wasn't real at all.

_Silly notion._

"I... Dunno," she finally ventured to answer Rinn's question. "I... I think I'm dreaming." She didn't feel particularly concerned, nor shared Rinn's clear and rising alarm. Dreams were... alright. She was used to dreaming and even more used to knowing that she did dream. This felt more clear than usual but still, she didn't feel particularly _threatened._

_Might as well see where this dream goes._

Rinn clearly did not share her sentiment and it dawned on Helena a second later that Rinn too was simply a part of this illusion. A character, but certainly one she could exercise some control over. _I'll wonder if I'll fly in this one, I often fly in dreams..._

Rinn was shaking her head, her eyes troubled. "Don't think so," she said. "Not dreaming..." She shifted in the chair, tested the straps then looked at the people with them. "No restraints," she murmured. "No one looks... Imprisoned... Kidnapped..."

Helena thought she saw the man in front of them turn his head slightly, a puzzled frown on his face before he smiled at their curiosity and turned his direction back to something in his lap. Helena frowned at him, puzzled then turned back to Rinn. She tried to imagine what sort of dream this was but came up blank.

"I really have no idea what's going on," she confessed with some ire. "This must be a dream. You're at the coast." _And I had been in my apartment or... What? Had I gone to sleep?_ She couldn't remember and Rinn didn't look convinced.

"Not anymore," she said and blinked when the man in front of them turned around again. She gave a shaky nod at his attention and dropped her voice. "I was... I felt... Sick. And then..." She trailed off when she saw Helena frown who paused and shook her head, thinking back hard.

"I don't remember anything," she said honestly which troubled her, because she had never been one to distrust her faculties. She was of the fortunate disposition to be ever observant and this was... puzzling. _It had to be a dream._

"This is very strange." She took a moment and looked around her, seeing that she was on the middle seat of three, almost like an airline. There was an older man sleeping next to her, his body pressed against the side of the vehicle they were in. She bit her lip, hesitated then carefully reached out and touched his arm, drawing back the moment she saw she had his attention. Involuntarily her hand shuddered away from his, the sensation of his skin on hers making her wipe her hand on her pants. _You have issues._

"Sorry," she said quickly when the man turned a disgruntled look on her. "But where are we going?"

The man shifted away from her and glowered at her. "Where the hell do you think?" He said gruffly and his tone made Helena wish she could shift away from him. "Settle down." He turned away and closed his eyes again.

Angry, Helena sniffed and muttered something rude under her breath. When she turned back to Rinn, she saw that her friend's eyes had become as wide as saucers and that panic, barely contained, was coming forth again.

"We'll get answers," she promised. _And it's a dream, really – there's nothing to be scared of._ The man in front of them turned back again and gave them an amused smile.

"Nervous?" he queried, studying their bewildered expressions. Helena quickly schooled her features to something of a pleasant demeanour and shook her head, leaning forward so that she could speak without disturbing the man next to her.

"Some," she said ambiguously. "Don't know what to expect. Can you enlighten us?"

The man gave her a curious look. "Well, for which division did they sign you up for?" he queried. "Or did you apply?" When they did not answer him, he smiled slightly. "Well, we'll be processed, given upgrades to our equipment if we need it. Then, the mine will use us where they need us. It's quite simple really. When was the last time you had an evaluation?"

Helena had no idea what he spoke of so she didn't commit to any serious answer, shrugging lightly as she did so. "It's been a while," she said. "These evaluations are routine?" _What the fuck is he talking about and what will be expected of us?!_

"Yes," the man said. "You're last assessment will be on your file. But the system's usually well organised. They'll tell you what to do, don't worry." He paused for a moment, smiling at them. "Are you two sure you're on the right shuttle?"

Helena had to sit back. _Shuttle?_ She thought. _What sort of shuttle?_ When she realised that an answer was expected of her, she made a noncommittal sound and whispered to herself. "This is a dream."

Rinn glared at her and then quickly turned to the gentleman. "You seem quite at ease," she pointed out. "I guess this isn't new to you?"

The man smiled at her and shook his head. "No," he said. "Not new at all. I've been through this a thousand times. Work till there is none left, move on to the next place where there is some. The money's good with this firm. I can send some to my family." He smiled at them and Helena decided that he might be nearing his middle forties. He scrutinised them for a moment, his eyes growing kinder which was in sharp contrast to the treatment she had gotten from her neighbour.

"Are you two alright? You look... confused."

_Not particularly,_ Helena thought. _This must be a dream._ She wanted to answer something along the same line, but Rinn motioned her to silence as if anticipating her statement and gave the man a brief smile.

"Just nerves," she said. "And the travel. Brings on confusion and dulls the senses." She paused. "I feel like I hardly know where I am." If it was bait for the man to tell them where they were, he didn't take it simply smiled at them and looked as if he was about to return to whatever it was that he had been busy with before they caught his attention.

"Well, I'll keep an eye on you," he said and winked, a gesture that always made Helena wary of men. "Good luck."

He settled back and seemed content not to pay them any mind anymore, leaving the two of them to stare at his head.

Helena ran over what he said in her mind, trying to make sense of it, but she came up with nothing. For a few moments, she tried to stretch her mind beyond the boundaries of this supposed dream, to try and see where things were going. Again, she came up with nothing. If it was a dream, it was a very vivid and constricting one. She decided quite suddenly that she didn't like it and tried to wake herself, but failed at that as well.

She was beginning to get nervous and hid it by looking around the shuttle again, studying the other occupant's clothing and decided that she and Rinn didn't look out of place. She couldn't tell what any of these people were designated to do or what kind of people they were. A part of her felt as if they were all distinctly unremarkable.

And yet they were still unique. She could pick out every detail of their clothing, ever distinguishing feature on their faces. They weren't like the faceless automatons that she usually encountered in her dreams. They all looked... engaged. Alive.

She sighed and shook herself, turning back to her friend and _reminding_ herself that, if this was a dream, Rinn too was some figment of her imagination. Of course, she acted very Rinn-like which did give her some value as a separate train of thought. _A plot device? A character? A catalyst?_

"Any ideas?" she finally made herself query. "Do you know what this is all about?"

Rinn blew out a frustrated breath, her hands finding the fabric of her shirt and rubbing it between her fingers. "None," she said and sounded worried. "But... We don't stick out except for being clueless. Everyone seems to assume we should be here." She dropped her voice. "Nothing he said seems familiar. I... I don't know what to do."

Figment of her imagination or not, Helena could tell that Rinn was scared. Panicked even. She took a moment to smile at the reflection of her friend and briefly reached out and touched her arm. If anybody had done that to her, she'd have shuddered, but Rinn seemed to settle a bit. "It's alright," she soothed. "We'll wait it out. No one's concerned so we're not in danger. And, we're not the only two women. The plot will reveal itself in due time. It always does."

Rinn stirred under her touch, muttered something under her breath, but then sighed and settled back a bit. "This isn't one of your stories," she pointed out, her fingers still clasping the fabric of her shirt, using the sensation to anchor her. Rinn had always been a very tactile person, predominantly needing touch to steady her. Helena herself didn't tolerate the gesture, her childhood shaping touch into something that had to be avoided at all cost. Rinn continued to fidget until she blew out a breath.

"So strange."

_You don't say,_ Helena thought with a brief smile. She thought about their predicament and once again tried to anticipate where this _story_ was leading her. There was no way of knowing and she settled back with a frustrated sigh.

"I still think it one of my dreams," she murmured more to herself than to Rinn. She took a moment to try and see whether she could wake up, but found that she was still trapped there. "Granted, one I can't wake up from, but a dream none the less..." She felt more than saw the way Rinn frowned at her, but said nothing. Had she chosen to make conversation, it would've been lost in the sudden drop in pressure in the cabin. Helena stiffened when she felt the seat jerk underneath her, but the other passengers did the opposite. They stirred and sat up straight as they began to try and see what was happening around them. It dawned on Helena that they were getting ready to _get up,_ with many of them loosening the straps around their chest.

"We're here," she whispered, feeling Rinn stiffen next to her.

"Wherever here is," her friend said darkly, the worried panic still clear in her voice. Again, Helena thought to tell her that this was all a dream, but she decided that it was futile trying to convert a fictitious occupant in her subconscious that the world which gave birth to it did not exist. So she settled back and waited out the bustle, finding a way to release the straps of the chair. Rinn had more trouble with hers, her hands shaking as she fought with the delicate lock. Helena loosened the straps for her, not really asking, but once again intentionally allowing her fingers to briefly touch her friend's, to show her that she was here. Rinn stopped fidgeting and simply allowed the aid, though she didn't dare meet her gaze. _Hates appearing incompetent._

They were almost the last two left in the shuttle once Rinn was finally loose. Both made their way outside and looked at the world around them, immediately frowning at the slightly acrid smell in the air. All of the people were bundled together, a second shuttle near theirs. Helena didn't join the group immediately, but frowned at the scene, watching as more people were offloaded.

_The shuttle._

It looked terribly familiar and it took her only a second to realise why. She reached out and grabbed Rinn's arm, pulling her back and pointing at the shuttle. Her friend turned her bewildered gaze to her face. Then her green eyes swept past Helena in the direction that she was indicating and the woman stiffened, drawing in a breath without letting it go.

Helena was the first to speak, her mind working quickly, but soothed by the fantasy of it. _Mass Effect,_ she thought as she looked at the shuttle. _It's from Mass Effect__.__T__his dream is about that._ It made her feel distinctly better, because now she knew that it could be nothing else but a dream. One she might almost look forward to.

"The setting is revealed," she whispered and quickly pushed her stoic friend in the direction of the group, not wishing to draw any more attention on themselves. "Now we just lack a plot..."

* * *

**Miranda was almost standing on top of her, her waist at eye level with Helena's gaze as she moved to see what was wrong with Rinn's leg.** Helena looked at her, at her light armour and her curves. With Miranda, you _had_ to spare a moment to look at her body.

This really _was_ Miranda. Miranda Lawson.

She closed her eyes and coughed, trying to still the rising nausea before she forced herself to move, shifting to the next chair so that Miranda had more space to work on Rinn.

"What happened here?" the Normandy's XO asked as she knelt down beside Rinn's leg, studying the blood. "Gunshot wound?"

Helena waited for Rinn to reply, but when her friend volunteered no information, she shifted and swallowed, opening her eyes again. She thought of Ramsey and made herself remember the name, fix it in her mind.

"She got her leg caught on disintegrating metal," she said. "When she got pulled loose... that happened." She swallowed, trying not to think of her own injury, of the pain she felt. _Rinn's had hers longer than you. You can do this Helena._ She didn't want to think about the first few moments this hell started. She didn't want to think about Cain. She closed her eyes again and felt a strange sensation of mourning for a person she didn't know. For a life lost. Senselessly.

_I should've known..._

The urge to cough came and went and she stilled it, fighting to keep her features neutral so that the people could not see her pain. _I'm fine..._ She looked to Rinn again and saw that Miranda had taken out a small knife from somewhere about her person and was carefully cutting away her pant leg to expose the wound. Her friend wasn't looking at the progress made, rather keeping her eyes firmly closed and her body stiff, pressed against the side of the shuttle. Studying her, taking note of the pallor of her skin, Helena wasn't sure whether it was sweat or tears on her cheeks.

Still breathing deeply to fight her nausea, Helena wiped at her own face and found it wet. _Sweat. Really._ She wanted to sit back, but remembered her back and rather leaned forward on her knees, slipping her hands into the pockets of the jacket out of habit. She watched as Shepard closed the shuttle door and sat down across from her, but quickly turned her gaze away. New emotions, disappointment and anger, flared up unbidden and it made her clench her fists in an attempt not to show it. As she did so, she felt a sudden sense of elation as her fingers brushed against two very familiar objects in the one pocket. She didn't take out the packet of cigarettes and what felt like an old fashioned zippo lighter, but their presence steadied her a little. She looked up again to see Shepard looking at her with faint concern and curiosity while the shuttle shuddered upwards. Her stomach lurched without warning and it took all she had not to throw up.

_Adrenaline,_ she told herself. _It's all the adrenaline._

And her back.

"What happened down there?" Shepard spoke up breaking the silence, her voice surprisingly calm. "Who are you?"

Helena realised that in all this time, they had not gotten round to introductions. She hadn't really thought of it, not really needing any.

She closed her eyes and took off her glasses, rubbing her nose. Now that she had settled, her shoulder was killing her, the pain spreading up to her neck and down to her leg. Next to she heard Rinn gasp and shift, but Miranda barked at her to sit still.

"My name's Helena," she said, not looking at Shepard but focusing on a spot by her feet. "That's Rinn. We ah..." She laughed bitterly, realising that a lie was difficult to tell. "We've actually only just started working there."

"On what?" Mordin said cheerily and she looked up, startled as she had forgotten that, in shifting away from Rinn, she had moved in next to him. "Professor Mordin Solus, at your service." He spoke so fast Helena could hardly hear what he was saying. She had had to use subtitles when she played the game...

_I know,_ she thought bitterly and looked at the spot on the floor again. _I saw you die in another life._

From beside her she heard Rinn mutter.

"Grunt work," the injured woman hissed under her breath, still not looking at Miranda. "They say, we do."

Helen took a moment to try and peer beyond Miranda's mass of dark hair, but the woman was very good at obscuring Rinn's leg.

"Grunt work on what?" Shepard asked, forcing Helena's attention away from her friend again.

"An artefact," Helena said cautiously. "We were brought in to..." She struggled, tried to remember what lies had been told to them when they were still being processed. It felt like a lifetime ago. "Just help with admin. The artefact was requiring more of the technical people to work on or something." She closed her eyes and shook her head. "They didn't explain their motivations to us. Things just happened very quickly." Again she wished that she could push backwards and straighten her back, but she didn't want to risk putting the wound against the shuttle wall. "One moment we were getting everything sorted. Where we would sleep. Where we'd eat. The next..." _That damned closed door._ "The next thing we know we were fighting our way through... Those husks as she called them," She gestured to Miranda.

Helena looked up at Shepard, meeting her gaze though it was wearily. She wasn't sure whether she should be talking to Rinn's character. "They were... Like the stuff that had attacked Eden Prime right? The geth's foot soldiers."

Even though it wasn't her character, Helena could see the deep look of regret and weariness that entered Katelyn Shepard's features. "Yes," she said simply. "They're not... of the geth. It's a long story."

"Complicated?" Rinn asked from her side of the shuttle and finally opened her eyes.

Katelyn looked at her and was silent for a fraction of a moment longer than Helena felt she should've been. "Yes," she said. "I'll tell you when we're on the Normandy - our ship. Is there anybody we can contact for you in the meantime?"

Helena shook her head while Rinn held her character's gaze. Neither of them said anything further and the silence in the shuttle became distinctly awkward until Rinn hissed in pain suddenly and tried to pull her leg away from Miranda. The woman wouldn't let her though, grabbing her leg and keeping it steady. Helena looked at the wound that was briefly exposed and then at Rinn's face. She felt dark trepidation and concern knot her stomach and thought to lighten the mood a little. _I should've taken better care of her, she's my responsibility._

"Rinn," she said, trying to keep her voice light and smiling. "Think we should've taken the positions at Apenture Science rather?"

Her friend snorted a laugh and it felt bitter sweet to hear it. "Think there are any posts still open? Didn't they want _test_ subjects?"

Helen grinned, happy that Rinn was playing along. "Might not be that bad," she said. "Besides, they have cake. And theme song." She couldn't believe she was doing it, but still she found herself singing.

"_Apenture Science..._"

Rinn opened one eye to look at her. "You're going to get that song into my head, aren't you?"

Helen had never been one to do things in halves. _"But there's no sense crying over every mistake,_" she sang softly and could almost _feel_ Mordin's pleasure next to her. _"You just keep on trying till you run out of cake..."_ She trailed off, too nauseous to carry on singing. "Seemed like a good deal anyway." She smiled weakly.

"I have to learn that song," Mordin said out of nowhere and again, Helena's heart ached. She closed her eyes and rubbed at them, turning her face away from Rinn. "It's quite catchy."

Shepard had smiled briefly at their exchange, but her expression turned neutral when she looked at Miranda who abruptly moved away from Rinn, straightening up so that she could stretch her legs for a moment.

"How bad is it?" Katelyn queried and Helena wondered whether Miranda had managed to get some medigel into her friend. Miranda shared a look with Shepard that Helen didn't particularly fancy.

"There's some shrapnel in it," she said shortly to which Rinn muttered.

"Shrapnel that feels as if it's _moving_."

Miranda ignored her and continued. "It would be best if Chakwas looks at it. It's very close to the artery so I don't want to touch anything now. She might have to operate to remove it. Helena, were you injured?"

It took her several moments to realise that Miranda had spoken to her. Helena looked up and met the woman's gaze, quietly amazed by the force in them. She was careful not to show any emotion as she shook her head, but she could tell immediately that Miranda wasn't convinced. The woman knelt down again and reached out to take her wrist. Helena's reaction was instinctive as she jerked away from her, almost baring her teeth before she caught herself.

"Don't touch me."

The words were said without hesitation and in a low warning she had perfected over many years of use. Miranda gave her a _very_ blank look and suddenly her omnitool appeared. Before Helena could shy away from it, or do _anything_ for that matter, Miranda waved it over her, scanning her. The woman's eyes were not impressed when she looked at the readings.

"Helena," she said sternly. "Show me your injury."

Helena blinked started and sat up defiantly. "I don't have one," she snapped and was aware of the fact that Rinn seemed to have roused herself more. Her one hand was still clutching her leg, but a discarded hypodermic told Helen that Miranda _had_ succeeded in getting some medication in her.

The woman was _good_ at what she did.

"Se gat," she heard her friend snap. "What's wrong Helena? You're as pale as a sheet!"

Helena grimaced and shook her head stubbornly. "Rinn, I'm car sick, nothing more."

Her friend glared at her and, although the subject matter made her uncomfortable, Helena was glad to see some life return to Rinn's features.

"It was that creature," she mused. "The one I pulled from your back." Helena was surprised she had remembered it. The people in the shuttle's eyes widened slightly at the image. "That must be it. Show us your back, Helena."

Helena glared at her and Garrus took the moment to say from the cockpit, "ETA 5 min to Normandy."

It gave her a moment to decide to change her approach, realising that being defensive wasn't going to get her anywhere. Helena considered her options for a moment, thinking of what could get Rinn to back off. Then, she turned her attitude 180 degrees, allowing her features to relax and a smile to come to her lips as she gave Rinn a considering look.

"Come now, darling," she said in a flirtatious tone, knowing that Rinn rarely liked any kind of attention. She allowed her irritation to give way to amusement as she winked at Rinn, not even caring what the other people in the shuttle thought of the gesture. _Rinn would be so lucky..._

"Now's not the time for us to be showing _any_ skin."

Rinn's mouth twitched, but she kept her gaze firm.

"Stop it," she said. "Don't mess with me, you're not ducking this one." She turned to Shepard as if expecting help from that corner. But it was Miranda who gave Helen an irritated look and stepped right up to her, towering over her in such an intimidating manner that Helena stood up immediately, feeling threatened. She could not hide her pained grimaced as she moved, but it did not make her back down. In her heeled boots, Miranda was slightly taller than she was and they were so close to each other that if Helena moved a fraction she would've brushed against the woman. Every nerve in her body cried out at her to step away, but there was nowhere she could go.

"Show me your injury," Miranda snapped. "We don't have time for silly games!"

_Silly games?!_ Helena fumed as she glared at Miranda, not saying a word and certainly not moving to comply. She had never done well with commands and certainly not any given in that tone of voice. She prepared herself to stare Miranda down or try to anyway, but then she felt someone else's gaze on her. She expected it to come from Rinn, but was surprised to find that it was Katelyn Shepard instead. The commander didn't look as if she was going to comment, her features unreadable as she studied the standoff. When she saw Helen looking at her she turned her emerald gaze upwards, waiting.

_Weighing her._

Helen felt her heart clench and had to close her eyes, her will to argue and her anger draining away. Suddenly, it took a lot of effort just to remain standing. Again, Stephen King came to mind, and the rough voice of Blane de Mono, the insane train.

"_Don't ask me silly questions,"_ she whispered under her breath and slowly turned around, acutely aware of every eye on the shuttle following her movement. _"I won't play silly games."_ She glanced at Rinn, met her gaze and then turned away, wondering how her friend's fear of blood would deal with the sight that was about to meet her.

"_I'm just a simple choo choo train and I'll always be the same." _

She unzipped her new jacket carefully, her fingers trembling and dumb as she tried to perform such simple a task. It was even more of an effort to get out of it, the pain seizing and stiffening her shoulder beyond aid. It was Mordin who got up and slowly peeled the layer of clothing away from her. She closed her eyes and braced herself against the wall with her good arm, the jacket already stuck to her back from drying blood. She could not stop herself from hissing as she felt something pull painfully and Mordin immediately stopped moving the jacket as Miranda shifted closer to her again.

"Wait," the Normandy's XO told him. "Just... wait." Helena felt the woman step closer and cool fingers brush her back as she inspected the damage. Miranda made a considering sound and without warning there was a sensation like a massive band aid being pulled off of an open wound. Helena bit her lip painfully in an attempt to keep herself from whimpering and stood there, breathing deeply, as a fresh flow of blood slowly began to find its way down her back again. She had to swallow down a rush of nausea and, unable to help herself, balled her fist and hit against the wall once, using the sensation to anchor her. The world threatened to fade, but she took another deep breath and forced herself to remain upright. She thought she heard a wild bark of laugher from Rinn and turned to see her friend staring at her, her features blank and her gaze... Gone.

Helen looked at her with dismay. _This_ was why she had not wanted to show her back to Rinn, why she had hoped that she'd be able to fake it to the infirmary. Rinn's phobic dislike for blood was a hard master and she needed her friend to focus, to be alright. There was no telling what she might do when confronted with what Helena suspected was a sight that resembled nothing more than raw, mangled meat.

Helen felt a cool hand on her hip as Miranda steadied her and for the first time, she welcomed the touch, daring to bring her left hand down to cover it with hers. There was a moment when their fingers entwined and Miranda squeezed hers in sympathy. Helena shook the sound of flowing water out of her ears and, when she blinked to steady herself again, she glanced at Rinn to see that her friend was trembling, her eyes wide with the horror. Helen had wanted to spare her. Yet then, she saw her take a deep breath and steel her gaze. Rinn moved suddenly, trying to push herself up but clearly her leg failed her. Miranda turned away from Helena's back for a second to talk to Rinn, but her friend reached out and grabbed Miranda's arm. The XOs touch disappeared and Helena was left standing on her own, blinking in what felt like the brightening light of the shuttle.

"Help her," Rinn snapped, her insistence clear above the white noise in Helen's ears. "Do something. It... You can't just stand there looking at it."

Miranda gave Rinn a frowning look as Helena felt Mordin take a hold of her good arm, slowly helping her turn around and guiding her down.

"Wound not critical now," he said. "Not much to do here. Not with time at hand."

Helena had never been so happy to sit down in her life and closed her eyes, breathing deeply. She wanted to tell Rinn to relax, but for the moment, all she could do was take several deep breaths.

"Not critical?!" Rinn snapped and tried to pull herself up against Miranda's arm. "I can see her muscles moving! On her _bones!_ She has bones sticking out!"

_Anger,_ Helena thought. _Was a hard companion to let go of once it resided within you._

"Rinn," Miranda said sharply, pulling away from Rinn and settling her. "There is nothing we can do for her here that we can't do in the infirmary. _You_ have to remain still! You don't know the damage that can be done if that shrapnel moves."

The way she said shrapnel made Helena shudder and she sat up, swallowing away her own nausea. _You're just making yourself sick,_ she chided herself. _It's not that bad. Mordin says so._

Rinn had other ideas and looked absolutely furious. _Or was it terrified?_ "You can't tell me there's nothing _you_ of all people can do!" She snapped at Miranda and there was... A pause. So small, so tiny that Helena hardly thought that Mordin noticed. Yet, Shepard and Miranda did. She could sense it. Feel it. Pulsing in their attention.

_You of all people..._

The implication that they knew them. Knew what they could do.

_Fuck,_ Helen thought and closed her eyes. _Fuck._


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 02. **

**Survivors. **

She had always wondered about the term, whether it was meant to be positive or negative. Whether one should be grateful. She had been a survivor on Mindoir at a terrible price she rarely thought about. Rarely spoke about.

Survivor.

Katelyn Shepard wasn't quite sure what to make of the pair of women they had rescued from the mine. Of similar build, both could've been no older than thirty. They did not look like siblings yet the way they moved, the way they flowed reminded Kate of how she and her brother could communicate without words. They came from a similar life, one which had ultimately led them to hell and back. She felt sorry for them, even admired the way they constantly moved to protect each other. Desperation clearly fuelled the anger that they had used to survive.

Two out of what must've been nearly a thousand employees.

Two.

_How had we missed that injury? _

The wound had been a grizzly sight. The gashes as the husk must've slashed at her were more than evident among the carnage of torn flesh and loose hanging skin. Helena was sitting now, her body trembling and her eyes downcast as her friend demanded Miranda's help. It was the first time Rinn had shown even the slightest sense of hostility since meeting them. Mordin's words seemed to antagonise her even further.

"Not critical?!" Rinn snapped in outrage, her knuckles white on Miranda's arm. "I can see her muscles moving! Over her bones! How is that not critical to you?!"

Miranda shifted slightly, but if Rinn's touch was paining her, she wasn't showing it. "Rinn," her XO's voice was low and reasonable. For all her crew's whispers of their XO, Miranda understood human emotion. Compassion. Yet she never let anything other than reason spur her decisions.

Apart from when it came to her sister.

"There is nothing we can do for her here that we can't do in the infirmary. You have to remain still. You don't know the damage that can be done if that shrapnel moves."

Rinn's anger was explosive.

"You can't tell me there's nothing you of all people can do!"

It was there. That accusation. There was stillness in the air, the words hovering for a moment longer than one would otherwise have expected them to. _You of all people,_ Katelyn wondered what she meant by that; what she knew. _Did she mean the Lazarus project? _

The commander suppressed the shudder that ran through her, the inner horror she had not faced. Instead, she focused on the curious insert from an even more curious creature.

Helena broke in, sounding close to tears, the first emotion other than anger that she presented to them. The roles between the two had now completely changed.

"Rinn please," she pleaded, her voice laced with exhaustion and emotion, yet it had a more profound effect on her friend than, Katelyn suspected, shouting would've had. Rinn recoiled, her green eyes shooting to Helena. The ginger had tried to compose herself, but seemed to have failed. "Rinn... Please don't shout." Her voice was still quiet, low and yet, despite the hum of the engines, they could all still hear it. "We... There's been enough of that. Please, just calm down. It's alright. I'm alright." When Helena blinked, tears spilled from her eyes down her cheeks and she cursed suddenly, yanking her glasses off with such ferocity that they dropped to the floor. Clearly embarrassed, Helena put her hands over her eyes as must've been her first intention, before the glasses got in the way ,and sat there, fighting for control.

Again Mindoir came to mind, the vague memory of her sitting in the shuttle, fighting tears among strangers. Katelyn looked out to the shuttle window, glancing at the Normandy briefly before the Kodiak was swallowed into the hangar bay. She stood as the shuttle landed and took two steps towards Miranda and Rinn, though her gaze remained on Helena for a second longer.

"I think we should all quiet down," she said calmly and looked down at Rinn who only then seemed to realise that she was still holding Miranda. She let go immediately, hiding her hands in her lap. Katelyn looked curiously at her XO, wondering why the woman hadn't removed the hand as she no doubt could have. The Cerberus operative kept her face blank, however, revealing nothing even to her.

With all eyes on her now, Katelyn motioned her head towards the shuttle door.

"We're here."

She glanced at Mordin when he shifted, clearly pleased to be able to go back to his lab, then she turned to Rinn.

"My chief medical officer, Dr Chakwas is coming with a stretcher for you, Garrus would've let her know on the way." She glanced at Helena who had not moved yet. "But he naturally didn't know that you were injured as well. I will tell her to send another..." She paused and glanced at Miranda. "Or would you prefer Helena to go first?"

To her eye, the ginger's wound did look worse, but there was something in Miranda's eyes as she replied without hesitation.

"No," her XO said. "The sooner we have her wound looked at, the better. It's older and infected. I need to go with Chakwas, explain to her... what I've seen." Her pause was so quick that Katelyn wondered whether anybody other than she had noticed it. What was wrong with Rinn's wound?

Miranda had turned to Mordin. "Professor Solus, could you monitor Helena until the stretcher arrives?"

The salarian's hesitation registered for only a second. "Of course," he intoned. "I'll be happy to." He turned to smile at Helena, but she had not moved to look up yet, her gaze fixed on her glasses on the floor. Rinn however had started to lean forward and carefully picked up the thin frames, her hands trembling so much Kate thought that she might drop the spectacles again. She didn't though and Helena followed her movements up, her features unreadable as she stared at the glasses. She seemed to reach out to touch them, then hesitated and instead reached a little bit further. Her fingers brushed the outside of Rinn's arm as if she was testing not only Rinn's reaction, but her own. Then she grasped her friend's wrist, squeezed it tightly, warmly, and took the glasses from her fingers. She withdrew, slipping them back onto her face with a practiced motion.

Katelyn took in the gesture. It had been gentle, strengthening and plainly more for Rinn's benefit than Helena's – who had clearly shown her distaste of physical contact mere moments before.

The door slid open to the silence of the shuttle. Beyond it Dr Karin Chakwas stood ready with her assistants. Katelyn watched as her XO quickly moved to the door and explain in somewhat hushed tones what it was that they were facing. She took a moment longer to stare at the two women, then joined the doctor, catching only the tail end of Miranda's description of Ris' injuries.

"...possibly snaking its way through the vein. It's fortunate the injury isn't closer to the heart. We still have time, but we need to get her to the infirmary and prep her for surgery."

Chakwas nodded slowly, glancing into the shuttle. "And the other?"

Miranda made a vague motion to her shoulder. "Severe trauma to her back, but it's a very fresh wound, can't have happened more than a couple of minutes before we found them. Severe bleeding, but she'll hold for a moment or two longer. Mordin will stay here and monitor her."

Chakwas nodded again, looking at one of her aids. "Miller, inform Anita that we're bringing two wounded up to the medbay. One will be operated on immediately, so she better start getting everything ready."

* * *

**She had not seen Mordin reach for a first****-****aid kit****,**** but felt him move beside her and turned just in time to see him starting to press sterile bandages against her back. **Helena vaguely thought that she _should_ be able to feel it, but she didn't, her whole body trembling with shock.

Outside of the shuttle, beyond earshot Miranda was talking to Dr Chakwas, the older woman's features lined with concentration as she listened to the Normandy's XO. Shepard had disappeared and Helena didn't have the energy to wonder where. Rinn still sat beside her, her leg stretched out in front of her and her hands still white as she clutched it. Her gaze was focused on Helena and nowhere else.

A part of Helena wondered whether it was in accusation.

Rubbing her brow, again feeling as if she was going to be sick, Helena looked up in time to see Dr Chakwas step into the shuttle with them, a nameless assistant on her heels. She paused when she saw Helena's gaze snap to her and smiled though her full attention was on Rinn.

"My name is Karin Chakwas," she said softly. "I'm a doctor here. Rinn, I am going to ask that you come with me, can you stand?"

Rinn finally turned away from Helena, looking at the doctor.

"You have to take Helen first." Her voice was soft, but her eyes were narrow.

Karin smiled at her, not dismissing her claim, but motioning to Helena and Mordin. "She's in good hands for now Rinn, please. I've been told that your situation is more critical."

Rinn glared at her. "If I'm up, I can walk," she insisted. "Lena has had no medigel. Or anything. Take her."

_She's going to argue with them till the end of day,_ Helen thought and finally gathered the strength to say something. "Rinn, go with them." Too late she realised that her voice held a regrettable amount of impatience. "I'll follow. I can walk up with you if you want."

She could tell immediately that her impatience stung Rinn and she felt terrible. When she started to rise and formulate an apology, her friend waved her down.

"Sit," she snapped. "Stay. Wait for them to come and get you."

Helena did so and did not miss the look of agony that crossed Rinn's features as Chakwas pulled her up and helped her out of the shuttle. The tall woman dwarfed the doctor in the doorway and she swayed visibly as the medic team readied the stretcher for her. There, Rinn's brief moment of courage faltered and she looked back, terrified. There was very little that they could say to each other. It didn't help protesting, but they still had their own insecurities and fears. She swallowed down the nausea and gave Rinn a weak smile, hoping that it would also serve as an apology to her previous behaviour.

"It will be alright," she said. "I'll see you. Later."

_How many times have I said that today? _

Rinn opened her mouth to say something, but stopped and simply allowed the doctor to help her to the stretcher. Her eyes were wide with fear and a pain that must've driven her mad, but she set her mouth straight and simply stared at the ceiling as the people fussed around her. Helena's own courage was fading fast, faster than her rage and the anger she had used to keep her moving forward up until this moment. When they pushed Rinn out of sight, she wanted to get up, but Mordin moved quickly, putting his free hand on her wrist. He increased the pressure on her back immediately and when Helen moved she could feel the blood pooling down on the chair below her.

She remained in the shuttle, with Mordin's hand on hers, her blood trailing down her back.

Helen hardly breathed as she listened for signs of protest, for her friend's cry or _anything_ that would give her a reason to leap up and out of the shuttle, but there was none. When it was clear that they had left, she closed her eyes and tried to get her breath back as her chest had become very tight. Mordin slowly removed his hand from her wrist and started to say something when Helen's nausea finally got the better of her. Her chest heaved painfully as she vomited and, as it were with these things, it was a mess.

There was no grace in action, no way of doing it with her dignity intact. And, it hurt. It hurt every bared muscle and bone on her shredded back as her chest dry heaved everything she had eaten in this world onto the floor. She heard a growl and sensed more than saw a movement.

"Hold her hair, Mordin," the turian voice growled and Helena felt cool, snake skin like fingers brush her neck. "Like so. Humans have a problem with these things. I learned that in C-Sec." The idea of Garrus standing over a drunk holding back her hair was so comical that Helen started laughing, but it came out like sobs as her chest continued to contract. She closed her eyes and tried to force herself to regain control of her body and, when she managed to stop heaving, wiped her mouth and nose with a shaking hand.

"I'm sorry," she said, blinking tears and she felt the fingers shift to her neck briefly and give it a soothing rub. "It... It's been... a long day." She blinked again and there were more tears trailing down her cheeks. Mordin gave her the jacket back probably so that she could wipe her mouth and face. Helena did so, then fumbled for the pocket, remembering the cigarettes.

"I can imagine," Garrus said. "You were hauled up there for..." He paused when Shepard appeared in the shuttle doorway again. She took a moment to assess the situation in the cabin, her green gaze meeting Helena's. They stared at each other for a moment, and Helena, in the process of fishing out the zippo, stopped what she was doing immediately.

"Why aren't you with Rinn?"

Katelyn shifted and gave her a surprisingly kind smile. "She's with Officer Lawson and my doctor," she said. "They spoke of prepping her for surgery. She'll be fine, she's in capable hands."

Her green eyes were still weighing and Helen suddenly wished that she didn't have the offensive mess between her feet. She licked her bitter tasting lips and closed her eyes, pulling out the cigarettes and lighter as she did so. She remembered, vividly, how Shepard had pushed away the smoke from the batarian mechanic on the Archangel mission. She got the impression that the commander didn't like smoking much and the sharper look in her eyes definitively merited that observation.

Still, the urge to bring one to her lips was almost overwhelming and she fumbled with the packet, trying to fish out at least one. Something was bothering her, something just at the edge of notice. Trembling, Helena couldn't place her unease.

_Why did they take her first?_

Helen did not need to feel the blood on her back or remember Rinn's reaction to the wound. She had felt what the husk did to her. Adrenaline had kept her going as they dashed out of the mine, but now that she had sat still for so long, she _knew_ that she was going to have problems.

Her wound was bad and still actively bleeding.

Yet, they couldn't have rushed Rinn out of there faster if she had been in the middle of cardiac arrest.

Her eyes found Shepard's as she managed to dislodge a cigarette.

"Is she dying?" she whispered. "Why did they take her?"

Shepard shook her head, though not in denial, and slowly sat down on the chair opposite hers again, her eyes briefly touching the cigarette.

"I can't say, Helena."

The red head grimaced, her body shuddering in pain as Mordin removed his hand. "It's not right," Helen whispered and dropped the cigarette suddenly, her fingers shaking so much she couldn't hold onto it. "It's not just... Like shrapnel. It can't move. I thought... It was a stab or..." She trailed off. Nobody moved to pick up the cigarette and she fumbled for another. "It's not critical. There was something else... Something..." She shuddered suddenly as her mind turned. _What else beside shrapnel could it be?_

"A piece of the artefact?" she queried before Shepard could say anything, then her stomach dropped. "A piece of husk?" She didn't need to see Shepard shift awkwardly to know that it was true. Or perhaps what they suspected. She could see it in her mind's eye like a plot, like a piece of puzzle that had been missing from a story. She closed her eyes and had to take a moment, not sure whether she should laugh or cry.

_This is the kind of shit I pull in my stories..._

"That's it, isn't it? There's a piece of husk in there? Somehow. It's in her."

"Helena," Shepard started. "There's no telling, Miranda and Chakwas will have a look." Helena ignored her and tried to stand up.

"Those things... Those things were people," she said heatedly, as Mordin pushed her down again. From her side, Shepard did the same, putting a steadying hand on Helena's knee. The touch made her shudder and she tried to pull away from it. She couldn't stop talking, couldn't make herself focus on controlling her tears. They flowed down her cheeks without stop. "It changed them. Made them... Made them kill. And... And it's in her isn't it? Fuck. It's going to turn her into one of them..." _Spikes, the reapers put the humans on spikes..._ Helena's world blurred with panic, but Shepard squeezed her knee, anchoring her, forcing her to look at her again.

"Helena," she said firmly. "There is no telling. I can't tell you. I don't know. There's no use upsetting yourself. You both have been through enough. Let my people look and assess the situation before we jump the gun."

_Enough?_ Helena thought wildly as she looked at her. _You have no idea..._

She bit her lip and closed her eyes. Not caring what Katelyn though, she put the cigarette she had managed to hold onto into her mouth and started fidgeting with the zippo. She imagined that Shepard's gaze became a little bit sharper, but she didn't protest.

"You have," Garrus agreed quietly and she got the impression that he was helping Katelyn to subtly change the subject. "What happened down there? How is it that you two survived?"

Helena swallowed and tried to think, finally managing to produce a flame from the all too familiar feeling lighter. She watched it flicker in front of the cigarette's end, her hand barely able to keep a hold of it. Shepard's mouth definitively thinned, but again she said nothing. Mordin on the other hand shifted irritably.

"Smoking bad for health," he pointed out, twitching beside her as he fidgeted around. "Should not..." He trailed off when Katelyn shook her head ever so slightly. Grateful, wishing she could tell them that it was only going to be _one_ cigarette anyway, Helena drew in a shallow breath and held it, both hating and savouring the taste of the unfamiliar tobacco. _Is it tobacco? What would they smoke in the future?_

The action steadied her, giving her time to think and finally control her tears.

"They just... We just came there," she said honestly when she exhaled, immediately taking another drag. "The place was being evacuated. Rinn and I were in the lower levels. With some others. We got... There were problems." Fury followed. "And we got behind and they fucking locked us in. We couldn't get out, so we... decided to hide in one of the storerooms." She sighed and rubbed her face with her arm. "It didn't work out so well."

Shepard nodded in understanding, her features soft though there was something in her eyes that Helena didn't really like. She stared at the fictional hero and wondered what she was thinking. Helen felt a moment's pain when she looked at Kate's unfamiliar features and closed her eyes.

_Why couldn't you have been mine?_

"Helena," Mordin said beside her, his voice still ringing with irritation from her smoke. "Be prepared, giving you a shot."

She struggled to open her eyes and saw that he had one of those quick-inject hypodermics with him. She had never seen one in the game but she had seen it in some of the first trailers for Mass Effect 3. She grimaced and would've pulled away when she saw Katelyn sit back, briefly swiping at the air to get rid of the smoke when she thought that Helena wasn't looking. Feeling guilty suddenly, Helena dropped the fag and crushed it underneath her shoes. The dark blood on them wasn't all hers and she closed her eyes, her mouth dry. Mordin had made a pleased sound when she stubbed out the cigarette and slowly pulled down her collar to gain access to her neck.

"Shot of what?" She queried and cringed when he placed the tip against her skin.

"Medigel," he said. "Gives support. The medics are almost back. Will feel better soon. I promise."

Helen didn't move as she felt the tiny needle puncture her neck and a sensation much like honey flowing through her skin and into her veins. She could almost imagine the Mass Effect wonder drug fill her system, blocking her pain receptors. Tired, she closed her eyes and gave into the sensation. She did not open them again until the medics arrived to take her into the depths of the Normandy.

* * *

_**Gone,**_** Helena thought. **_**I've gone mad.**_

Standing in the locker room with her own clothes under her arms, Helena looked at the bustle of human beings around her, at the men and women that were quite comfortably sharing the same space. She turned behind her to see if Rinn had come through yet, then shook her head and glanced at the numbered tag they had put around her wrist.

_174_.

If the number meant anything to her, she didn't know about it. She glanced around for Rinn again and then sighed and diligently went to seek out her locker space. During the _processing_, she had her friend had gotten separated – divided into two separate groups. When she asked whether it would stay that way, she was reassured by a patient, but cold orderly that they would all be meeting in the locker room again. What followed had been an agonising experience in self-control, where Helena was pocked and prodded and examined in order to determine her _health_ status. She was made to write a test to determine her mental proficiency and, at the end, it was declared her vaccinations weren't up to date, but that the facility had run out of stock and she would have to wait till the next shipment arrived. Helena wasn't sure whether she was looking forward to that, but it wasn't the thought of being vaccinated that alarmed her.

It was the attention to _detail_.

Her dreams were pretty vivid, but in the end they had always just been that. _Dreams._ There were details that always lacked, including a strange warp of time she was always aware of. But this was all... Very real. She had tried to wake up all throughout the exam, but couldn't. Normally the physical touch of another could do that for her, but this time...

She just had to tolerate it.

And then there was Rinn to consider, her friend was also acting... Very real. Very scared, a lot more alarmed than Helen was at present. But, very real. Her arguments against their presence here, her thought process... Helena couldn't help but feel that even her dreams could not conjure up that semblance of realism.

Finding her assigned locker, Helena took a steadying breath and placed her palm against it. An orange light sprang up around her wrist as her omnitool put in the pre-programmed combination. That was... cool, she had to confess that. She had always liked the idea of omnitools.

_Omnitools,_ _Mass Effect like shuttles,_ _it had to be a dream._

A hand touched her shoulder and she squirmed away from it, thinking that it was Rinn who had come back. Instead, she felt her chest lurch when she realised that it was the man who had snapped at her in the shuttle. He looked less irritated now and was looking at her in a way she didn't appreciate.

"What do you want?" she snapped and took an unconscious step back, pressing her body against the locker. The man studied her movements and rubbed his neck.

"Look," he said. "I came to apologise. I was... Pretty rude on the shuttle. I didn't want us to get off on the wrong foot and..."

Helena glared at him and unconsciously pulled herself up to her full height. "Wrong foot set off," she said. "It's a pretty big station, I'm sure we don't have to cross paths again."

The man looked taken a back and reached out to touch her again with a determined look. There was a movement out of the corner of Helena's eye and suddenly Rinn was there – standing between them. She didn't say anything, but looked at the man. Not glaring. Not angry. It was just a simple look, but it made him back off with a muttered apology.

Helena sniffed and looked up at her friend's features as the woman turned around. They were pale and tense, but she also appreciated the concern that she saw there. She rewarded Rinn with a smile and motioned to the clothes in her hands, deciding not to mention the man's attention.

"Did you come through alright?" she queried, not bothering with a greeting.

Rinn frowned, hugging the bundle of clothes even tighter to her chest. "Same as you, I guess," she said, not meeting Helena's gaze. "Didn't like it."

Helena smiled at her and glanced at the number tied to her wrist. Illusion or not, she could see that her friend was struggling.

"Let's find your locker," she said. "And, I guess we should stick close. Did they tell you what we're going to do now?"

Rinn shook her head wordlessly, still not looking at Helena. Her eyes were darker than Helena remember and her features very tight.

"Well," Helena started when Rinn interrupted her suddenly, something that was very unlike her.

"How can you be so calm?"

Helena paused, hearing the alarm in her friend's voice. She didn't respond immediately, didn't really know how. The simple answer was that she just _was_,but that wasn't quite right. She wasn't calm, more and more of this whole experience was starting to freak her out. But she never... She could never show it.

She didn't really know how.

So, she shrugged and smiled. It wasn't a fake smile, but a standard one she had learned to perfect. The kind of smile that was meant to put people at ease, to fool them perhaps. But also, to fool herself into believing that the world was alright.

"I just... am," she pointed out. "Rinn this is... Let's face it, this can't be real. So..." She trailed off, seeing the look in her friend's eyes. She sighed and frowned, trying to put words to the feeling she had. "Rinn, this... This is unreal, let's agree on that. But we're also not sure what's going on. So... until we do, we just... have wait it out. There's no use wasting any energy on being irrational when you don't know what you're going to need that energy for."

It still wasn't the right answer and she imagined that she saw Rinn shake her head slightly. "That's being very N about it," she muttered, referring to the Myers and Briggs personality model, then sighed and finally met Helena's gaze. There were no words there, just a need to know that her fear was shared.

Helena reached out and touched the pile of clothes in her hands, not knowing what else to do. Not for the first time in her life, she found herself feeling quite inadequate as a human being. And being here, unable to give Rinn the comfort she needed made her feel even worse.

"I'll make sure it's okay, Rinn," she said hoping that her friend would take comfort in the promise at least. "It's going to be okay. We'll figure this out. And then we'll laugh about it. And write a story." She grinned, but it was forced. "Life's just one story anyway, we just need to figure out what the plot is all about."

* * *

**In hind sight, she probably lost consciousness or Mordin drugged her. **Helena couldn't say and didn't have the energy to query it. But, when she came to her senses again, she wasn't on her way to the infirmary surrounded by the second set of medics. Instead she was lying on her side, dressed in a paper-like hospital robe with a blanket pulled over her legs. Her back, stinging and cold, was open and bare. Helena shivered and tried to get her mind to work so that she could see to getting up, but for a moment, none of her limbs responded. Her mouth was very dry and when she moved her left arm, she felt something pull in it. Helen opened her eyes and stared at the IV line , then at the straw coloured liquid bag that hung above her head. Dazed and sluggish, she felt the strangest sensation of deja vu.

_Blood replacement plasma,_ she thought and had to stop herself from giggling hysterically. _A universal, synthetic material that could be used to replace blood until the body manufactured its own._ She had envisioned that the future would have something like that.

She shivered and thought that she should try to sit up, but didn't have the energy. The urge to just give up came and went. Helen couldn't imagine why she should bother trying to move, trying to keep going forward. Memories of the mine came and went. Of fighting, of moving forward, of Rinn...

_Rinn._

Helen's eyes snapped open and she almost whimpered, called out. She could not remember what happened to her friend and it pained her. She needed to find out what was wrong with Rinn.

When Helena tried to move again, she felt a hand on her shoulder and someone spoke up behind her.

"Officer Lawson, she's awake."

The voice was female and filled with professional caution. When Helena tried to turn around to see who was behind her, another woman appeared in front of her. Without her glasses, the features were blurry, but she could still make out Miranda Lawson's figure. She was wearing a pair of surgical slacks, white and her hair was tied back in a ponytail. She looked tired, but her eyes were blue and sharp as ever.

"Lie still, Helena," she said simply. "Don't move."

_Stay still Shepard, try not to move…_

Miranda reached out and touched her left arm. Her skin was cool and carried the determination that was her mark. Helena, frightened suddenly, tried to protest.

"Don't sedate me," she said, her tongue sticking to the inside of her mouth. "Please."

For a moment, she thought she saw a flash of amusement in Miranda's features as the woman's mouth twitched into what might've been a smile. She shook her head and reached back, bringing a cup with a straw closer to her. Helen hadn't even thought to ask for water, but found that she was very thirsty.

"I'm not going to," Miranda said simply. "Not now."

_But soon._

Helena shivered and could only take a small sip before Miranda drew the cup away again.

"Why?"

Miranda raised an eyebrow and shrugged, glancing behind her at something Helena couldn't see.

"I'm not quite ready yet," she said and again it struck Helen that the woman _was_ tired. She wondered how much time had passed. "We're just getting everything we need to treat at your back. It's been thoroughly sterilised, but I'm warning you, there might be a risk of infection."

Helena could only blink at her, feeling dumb. "There's a broad spectrum antibiotic in my car," she started to say, not thinking clearly. "That helps with infection. Burns like hell because it's the animal variety, but we..."

Miranda didn't look as if she knew whether she should be amused or surprised.

"What's that Helena?"

Unable to help herself, the red head blushed, realising what she had said. "I'm ahm," she blinked, pulled her thoughts together. "I'm sorry, I was thinking about animals and..."

Miranda made a considering sound. "Why don't you try and get some sleep again," she said. "You'll feel better. I know the medication is making you tired."

_And confused,_ Helena added and tried to move her right shoulder. She failed and she felt pain even in her drugged state.

"How much damage..." She began, then changed her train of thought. "Will I be able to use my shoulder again?" She had to know and it worried her that Miranda's reply was cautious.

"I see no reason why not," the woman pointed out. "I'm going to fix the damage that I can and then time and some physical therapy will tell. You've had extensive muscle and nerve damage; I'm not going to lie to you. But everything can be fixed."

Upset, but realising that there was nothing she could do about it, Helena snorted a laugh. "Even death it seems," she said to which Miranda nodded, her eyes gleaming.

"Yes," she said simply and made to move away when Helena shifted to keep her attention.

"Rinn?" she asked and watched with a sinking sensation as Miranda's eyes grew darker. The moment lasted only for a second before she smiled. It looked false. Miranda didn't have a very good bedside manner.

"Recovering from what has been a very long surgery," she said. "Dr Chakwas is monitoring her. We've removed most of the shrapnel…"

Helena tightened her hand into a fist.

"Husks pieces." She whispered and Miranda raised an eyebrow in surprise. "It was… that." Her mouth was dry again, but she suspected that Miranda wasn't going to allow her another sip.

"We're having the material analysed," Miranda said simply and squeezed her hand though Helena felt no warmth in the gesture. "We've removed most of it though the piece had degenerated somewhat. There's no need to be concerned." _Yet._ "Nurse?" She didn't say anything but held up her hand, signalling for something.

Helena tried to sit up, ignoring her body and the people's protest.

"I need to see…" She started, desperate to see Rinn suddenly, needing to assure herself that she was still alright. "Please."

They were having none of her protests as Miranda put her other hand on her shoulder, pushing her down. It was ridiculously easy to keep her in place.

"Make that 5 cc," she said to the nurse, then looked at Helena. "There's nothing you can do now," she said and if she wanted her voice to be soothing, it failed. "You have to keep still Helena and _stay_ still for a few days. If you can't do that, I will keep you sedated until your back heals and the grafts take."

Helen tried once more to push herself up but, when she failed, she relaxed completely and closed her eyes. She felt like crying, but it was from frustration rather than anything else. She felt the nurse's hands on her disappear and sensed movement behind her.

"What are you going to do to me?" she asked, her voice breaking. "What now?" Her head throbbed with the promise of a migraine. Seeing that she had relaxed a little, Miranda eased her grip.

"As I've said, we've cleaned your back," she said. "And I've started activating some grafts that I need to use. They'll start replacing the tissue that you've lost. I'll have a look at the surrounding tissue, see what's worth saving and then I'll start with the reconstruction."

Helena closed her eyes and shook her head. "Not... that," she whispered. "What are you going to do to me? To us? What?"

Miranda's hand tightened on her person and when Helena opened her eyes again she saw the woman frowning at her, puzzled by her alarm. Her mouth thinned to a line and then she sighed, ordering her thoughts.

"Nothing," she said. "We're not going to do anything to you two. I'm going to reconstruct your back. That's what I can do."

The nurse came back and handed Miranda a syringe. Helena watched it with a sinking sensation of horror. "Reconstruction?" Visions of Shepard sprang to mind and she had to swallow, her old nausea coming back again.

"Regeneration," Miranda said simply. "Reconnection. Healing. There is quite a lot of torn tissue, Helena. I'm going to save what I can and replace that which I can't." She was repeating herself, talking to Helen as if she was a child. Her elegant hands found the IV line and she injected the medication into it. Helena had visions of herself waking up a cyborg and shivered.

"You… can just let it heal by itself," she pointed out, a funny taste starting in her mouth and weighing down her tongue. "I… don't… I don't want to be something I'm not."

Miranda surprised her by laughing and this time, there was genuine amusement in her voice. "Helena, I'm not sowing a gun to your back," she said. "I'm just reconstructing the tissues with neutral stem cell grafts that we have. If you behave yourself, they should take a few days to start working to replace the tissue you've lost. It's a standard procedure…" A hint of pride came to her voice. "Though, one I've perfected."

_During my work on Shepard._

Helena shivered but felt her eyes close. Thinking became even more difficult and she fought tooth and nail within herself to hold onto her coherent thoughts.

"I don't want to change," was all she could think of saying as her friend and the husks came to mind. Behind her closed eyes she could vividly see how Rinn looked when she tore the husk that had nearly killed her into pieces. "Neither does Rinn." _Yet, haven't we both changed already?_

She could not open her eyes again as much as she tried, but felt a hand touch her forehead and cool fingers trace her scalp.

"Hopefully she won't have to," Miranda said.

And was gone.

* * *

**Coming from the elevator, Katelyn's steps took her to Kelly Chambers without thinking.** She had washed the mine from her body and had taken a moment in her room to collect herself. Yet, even that had not been able to completely wipe away the imprint of the fear and carnage that they had encountered inside.

The red headed yeoman looked up the moment she heard the elevator and her smile was friendly as always. Katelyn returned it without hesitation.

"Anything from the Illusive Man?"

"There have been no new messages, Commander," Kelly gave her an almost apologetic smile. "Nothing from the Alliance or the Council either."

Katelyn tried very hard not to grimace though she knew Kelly could see her disappointment at the latter.

_The Council wants little to do with me, Spectre or not. The Alliance is still cautious whenever they ask something and wouldn't openly be caught so much as sneezing in my direction. _Again Katelyn suppressed a grimace. She was paying for her association with Cerberus even if she had not really been given a choice whether she wanted to work with them or not. Her allies' distance forced her hand, forced her to place it into the man's who was a known terrorist.

_At least the Cerberus is doing something,_ Shepard thought coldly.

And she should probably not regret being brought back. Still the Cerberus branding, that seemed to have been all but burned into her skin, left her with more than an unpleasant feeling.

"And nothing internal either?" Katelyn asked. "Do we have an update on the IFF?"

Again Kelly answered in the negative. "I haven't heard of anything, better to speak to the engineers." She hesitated, then smiled at Katelyn. "Off do to your rounds?"

The commander smiled as it was the only answer she needed to give. Like Miranda, Kelly was just about on top of everything that happened on the Normandy. It was no surprise to have her notice Katelyn's habit of frequently walking about the ship, talking to the crew.

She winked at Kelly and headed for the elevators.

_Engineering first,_ she thought. The reaper IFF took priority and she needed to keep on reassuring the nervous engineers. They were the ones methodically working at bringing the whole crew closer to what would probably be a suicide mission. There were feelings of unease and trepidation that no amount of soothing could squelch, especially when their commander felt exactly the same way.

_I have to try and assure them though. We'll be careful, but we _have_ to do this. _

It was funny almost that, while they were preparing for this suicide mission, everything was being tackled with the greatest sense of _caution_.

_Preparing to die by doing our best to stay alive._

_I have to bring them back_. She didn't know who or what awaited them beyond the Omega 4 relay. Everyone would probably die, but that didn't make anybody expendable. Not to her. She didn't know how the higher ranks managed to sleep soundly at night. She rarely did.

The lift took her down and, as it opened again, Shepard considered whether she shouldn't check in on Jack and Grunt first. Grunt's hunger for fighting had been sated on the derelict reaper, but there was no telling how long that would last. The husks gave him more than enough bodies to tear into, both with his shotgun and his bare hands.

Unbidden, Katelyn's mind went back to their two guests and the storeroom she and Miranda had found them in. Rinn's knuckles had been both bloody and covered with the dark liquid of the husks.

_Desperation makes us capable of the impossible._ She hadn't had time to review the footage EDI had managed to recover from the mine, but the bodies of husks that littered the inside of the storeroom was all Katelyn needed to know that the fight to stay alive had been a bitter one.

The commander stepped out of the lift, looking down at the hangar below and paused. Grunt and Jack were on the deck looking as if their heart's desire was to destroy the place.

"EDI," Katelyn asked immediately. "What're they doing?"

"Fighting, Shepard," the AI answered. "Though, I believe in context one would state that they are playing. As they both seem to be enjoying it."

Katelyn watched them for a moment, seeing the way the krogan would charge at Jack only to be deflected by her biotics.

"Tell me they haven't broken anything," she said it more for herself than to EDI, but the AI answered regardless.

"They haven't, Shepard."

Kate glanced at EDI's avatar for a moment and crossed her arms, surveying the two. "Do you know why they're doing it?" _And on my ship?_

EDI paused. "I believe it is Jack's attempt to release some of Grunt's pent up energy. And her own."

Katelyn murmured a reply. She doubted Miranda knew what was going on and wasn't quite sure her XO would be pleased to hear of it. _Not that Jack or Grunt would care._

She decided that the least she knew of it the better. As amusing as it was, there were other matters that needed her attention. It was interesting though that Jack was the one who had instigated this. She had been different since Pragia.

_She's changing._

Katelyn turned her mind back to her task and continued on.

It was on the Engineering deck, more than anywhere else, that one really heard the heart of the Normandy beating. The Normandy's life one could sense all over the ship. It was in the water of the fish tanks, the electronics and holographs of CIC, the hum of life support, the currents running through EDIs servers. The Normandy lived and moved, perhaps quieter than Tali had been used to, but it was still there for those who knew how to listen. But its pulse, its heartbeat, came from the drive core. It throbbed even as you stepped through the doors on the landing of the steps down to the sub deck.

The commander stood there, savouring it for a moment before she entered through the next door. The two engineers were conspicuously absent. Tali was at her console, however, and Katelyn made sure her approach was loud enough not to startle the quarian.

"Shepard," Tali turned and her voice sounded... perplexed.

"Everything alright here?" Katelyn asked.

"Yes, we're just... It's no mean feat trying to hook up reaper technology to this ship regardless of how much Cerberus had studied it before. We're working as fast as we can but-" Tali was speaking very fast.

Katelyn gently waved the explanation off. "I'm not here to hurry you, Tali. I just wanted to hear how you're doing."

"I-" the quarian paused. "Sorry. It's just. We're dealing with actual _reaper_ technology. To call it a daunting task..." Tali rubbed the top of her helmet in a nervous gesture.

"We do what we can as fast as we can," Katelyn said quickly. "I'd rather you be as sure as you can be before we hit the relay. There's no point of any of this if we don't even make it through."

"But Shepard..." Tali's voice was soft; her hands together but not yet dry washing. _Still has a bit of the 'Tali on her pilgrimage' in her._ "I can't make that assurance even when we have everything fully installed..."

Katelyn leaned forward, taking her friend's arm gently. "Do what you can. You're the best engineer I know. I have faith in you."

"Thanks, Shepard," the quarian said and she relaxed a little.

The ginger gave her arm a quick squeeze then let go. "Where are the other two?"

"Kenneth is crawling around the ducts in sub deck, rewiring some of our systems in preparation. Gabby is keeping a lookout for Jack."

The image made Katelyn chuckle.

"I won't trouble them then. Tell them to arrange another game night soon, alright?" Katelyn paused for a fraction and then added. "Ask Garrus along this time. He might enjoy it."

"I'll do that, Shepard," Tali said haltingly and the ginger suppressed a smile.

She gave the quarian one last nod then turned. The door had slid open and she was about to step out when Tali called her back.

"Shepard, I just wanted to tell you," she said quickly. "I got a message from Kenn, y'know, from Omega?"

"I remember," Katelyn replied. The young quarian had gone to Omega on pilgrimage only to be robbed and unable to leave. "Did he make it back to the Migrant Fleet?"

"Yes, that's where he was writing from. The parts that he brought, along with his experience of trading in Omega, has gotten him a place on the Yasyn." Tali's voice held a hint of a smile.

"I'm glad to hear that," the ginger replied with a generous smile of her own.

"Katelyn, I- Thank you. For helping him," Tali paused, seeming to consider something. "You'd have seen by now that my people aren't always welcomed by the other races. I appreciate you looking out for us."

Katelyn's smile became a little sad.

"I won't see people condemned for the actions of their ancestors," Katelyn said gently. "And I won't tolerate exploitation of any race. You are a shining example of your people Tali. You make me want to care."

The quarian was clearly embarrassed.

"I... Thank you, Katelyn."

Again Katelyn gave a small nod and left. She kept moving until she reached the observation windows again. Whatever Jack and Grunt was doing, they were still at it. _Kenneth and Gabby still have some time left._ The thought made her grin. The crew, it seemed, had begun to learn how to flow with and around each other. She had been very unsure about them at first, but they were working well together.

The thought brought her back to her talk with Tali. Katelyn had been honest. The quarians she had met had not yet given her a reason to distrust the race altogether. It made sense. How can one judge many by one? _But is that how you feel about other races, Katelyn?_

She could not answer herself and selected the crew deck, watching the door close.

"EDI, do make sure Kenneth and Gabby have enough warning to get out on time."

"That request has already been made by Engineer Daniels," the AI replied methodically. Katelyn smiled and wondered what Kenneth would've done in life without his wing woman.

"Well, if you see that they're not going to make it on time, stall Jack."

There was a distinct pause. "Stall, Commander?"

"Oh, y'know," Katelyn said. "Maybe make the elevator trip a little longer. Not enough to be noticeable, but try, okay?"

"Of course, Commander." The AI sounded surer of herself now that her parameters of action had been defined.

Then the door slid open and revealed the corridor of the crew deck. Katelyn stepped outside the lift car and looked to her right at the life support room. Thane was in there. Quiet, as usual. He seemed one who wished to be alone with his thoughts so she did not go and talk to him.

Katelyn turned her gaze to the starboard observation deck and almost went there before she stopped herself. She didn't know what to say to Samara. The justicar had proven to be an enigma. By rights, her Code should've made her cold and reserved yet Samara held a warmth in her that pulled at Katelyn. She was merciless on the battlefield but here, on the Normandy she offered... companionship. Comfort. Katelyn liked going to her, if only for the silence of her company.

Katelyn pulled her mind to current matters and went to the infirmary, knowing that she couldn't delay the visit any longer. Not that she expected bad news, she was confident that Chakwas and Miranda would patch the two up physically.

But adrenaline, desperation and anger only took you so far. And from what these two women had seen, one had to wonder what they would be like once all of that wears off. There were so many directions Katelyn had seen people go when everything around them had calmed down. _What kind of people did I bring on board?_

They had downloaded as much as they could from the mine's servers before they destroyed the base. Katelyn had set EDI to shifting through the data to find out exactly _what_ had happened down there, but of the artefact that they had found there was no mention. _Layers within layers?_ _Clearly not an official operation_.

Of the two women, there was also no information.

Katelyn stepped into the infirmary and looked around.

Miranda stood by Rinn's bed, her back to Katelyn, seeming busy examining the woman's wound. The commander thus turned her attention to the other survivor's bed. She had a moment to study the red head's face before Anita turned her on her stomach, hiding half of it against the pillow. Unconscious, her brow still seemed to curl into a frown, her mind unwilling to relax.

Fierce and unyielding.

It had been the first impression she had given Katelyn in the mine and it still held. How long would it take for that to burn out and the real person to emerge? Jack came to mind. The biotic was changing, but it had been a bumpy road. _Are we going to have enough time together? _Katelyn though, looking at Helena's back.

The slashes, though cleaned, looked as bad as they did on the shuttle. Katelyn grimaced at it, watching how the muscle moved as Anita carefully shifted her. The blanket covering her started to slip and Katelyn, without thinking, reached out and carefully kept it in place. _Did Cerberus allow me the same dignity as they reconstructed me?_ Katelyn felt cold as she laid a gentle hand on the copper head, running her fingers through the tangled mass of hair. _Is it your friend that makes you fight so hard?_

She let her hand slip away, feeling Miranda's eyes on her. Turning, she found that her XO's look was... _conflicted._ It was strange to see on Miranda's features. It had barely been two weeks since they rescued Oriana. Meeting the youth had changed Miranda. In Katelyn's eyes at least, it had made her more human.

She wondered what her XO thought of these two. She had caught most of the fire Helena flung at them and was the only target of Rinn's upset. A quick glance at her arm showed Kate that there was a significant bruise already forming in the crook of her elbow.

_We might need more security there..._ She glanced back at Helena's shoulder then turned to Miranda.

"Are you going to do this?" she asked and watching as Miranda gave her a slow nod. _How easy is this for you? After me._

Rinn's words came back to her.

_You of all people..._

"Yes, Commander," Miranda replied simply, her tone low and intense.

_Commander,_ the title pulled her attention back to examining the blue eyes looking at her. _That's... new._

"She's in good hands then," Katelyn smiled at her. The ginger glanced at the form lying on the bed behind her XO. Rinn's dark hair was now loose, mostly hidden behind her shoulders. Katelyn could still not shake the fact that the woman looked familiar._ "_How is... Rinn doing?"

Katelyn glanced at Chakwas at the same time that Miranda did. Her XO seemed to defer to the older doctor, which was also new.

"For the moment, there's no telling," Karin answered. "She's stable and there appears to be no sign of the replication from the foreign material still lodged in her."

_Foreign material._ Helena had pieced it together fast enough. She was nothing if not sharp.

"You mean the husk fragment?" She made herself ask, looking at the sleeping woman. She appeared much more at peace than her auburn friend.

"We're analysing it," Miranda was the one to answer. She glanced over Katelyn's shoulder to the other patient, checking whether Helena might be awake. It wasn't a comfortable conversation to have, even in private. "Mordin's running some tests now. The nanocytes inside her system seem to be dormant. Almost like..." She paused briefly. "Skin cells that the finger was shedding..."

"Finger?" Katelyn asked surprised. "That's what it was?"

Karin nodded. "It would appear so, Commander," she replied. "I'll send you a report the moment I'm done with it."

A finger. A husk finger. The image of something like that, crawling from a wound above the knee all the way up to her thigh was horrifying. But wasn't everything they've encountered before? She should be over this by now. _This_ surprise. They had seen the thorian creepers, the way that creature had managed to so effectively control the colonists of Zhu's Hope. A finger of a reaper husk snaking its way up a woman's leg... That shouldn't have really rated, should it?

But it did.

And _it_ may be out of the woman's leg but the husk fragment was still on the Normandy in Mordin's lab. Or at least, most of it.

Katelyn's head turned briefly to the direction of the elevator. Such a small thing, still it troubled her. Despite the fact that she had a geth and a krogan on board. _This_ troubled her.

_Small things always end up causing the most mayhem._

"Is that thing safe to have on board the Normandy?" she looked Miranda and Chakwas in turn, then let her eyes slid down to the unconscious woman lying in the infirmary bed. "Is she?"

The two hesitated, Karin glancing up at Miranda who didn't seem keen to provide an immediate, reassuring answer.

"I think Mordin would be better able to answer that question, Commander," Miranda hedged. "Concerning the finger, that is. About her..." she trailed off and looked down at Rinn. "Time will tell," she said finally. "For now I believe she's safe. We just have to keep her, and Helena, under observation. At all times."

_Fortunately, we have no lack of spying equipment, do we?_

Katelyn's eyes train upward, ignoring the holographic projector where the AI could make some kind visual appearance. "EDI, I want them under watch_._" _As if they're not. Still..._ "Inform us if anything is amiss."

"Yes, Commander," the AI replied. The matter settled.

Yet, Kate hesitated. EDI could act as an early warning system, but she had no _weapons,_ no _actions_ that she could take if the two became dangerous. Katelyn had learned that sometimes a second or two's delay in action could be... too late.

She looked at Chakwas who would spend the most time with the two. The doctor could shoot and she carried her gun occasionally but... _She wasn't a soldier._

_She needs more protection._

And idea came to her but she didn't like it.

"I might consider asking Legion to help as well," she said finally. "If he..." _He?_ "If they say they're loyal," Katelyn amended. "They might as well make themselves useful." _Legion was the name of the devils that had possessed a man in biblical times._ _Is it a sign? A warning?_

Chakwas didn't look comfortable with the idea.

"Are you sure that's wise, Commander?" the doctor asked, shifting slightly. The geth had been involved from the very beginning. Eden Prime and the dozens upon dozens of planets the Mako had traversed. And then there were Feros, Noveria, Virmire, Illos, the Citadel.

_'Saren and the geth.' _The news readers still said. Not _'Saren and the reapers.'_

They had been chasing down geth when the SR-1 was destroyed and she could see those memories lingering in Karin's eyes.

Katelyn's gaze was soft when they met Chakwas' questioning look. "We have to test it at some point, Karin. We might as well start _here_. But I will give the matter more thought, at least until you inform me when they'll be conscious." She looked at the door leading to the AI core. _It saved me. There's no doubt of that. And if they really believe that I am their rescuer from the 'old machines', then they're loyalty would be unquestionable. _

_If I play the hero card._

The hero of the Blitz. The hero of the Citadel. The hero of the geth... As opposed to over them

_The Council would be horrified about that last one._

She sighed and rubbed her brow, smiling her leave at the two women. "Keep me posted," she said. "I might come back to talk to Legion later. I want to be updated the _moment_ something changes," she emphasised needlessly.

"Understood, Commander," Chakwas replied, her eyes seeming to read the personal interest Katelyn had. _Does she seem familiar to you too?_ She wanted to ask, but thought better of it. She was _hovering_ as it was and there was no doubt that Karin and Miranda had work to do and she was keeping them out of it.

"Well, I'll leave you again." Katelyn looked at both women, meeting their gazes. _They're invaluable,_ she thought and felt that knowledge seep deep into her. _They could never be expendable. _She smiled at them warmly, grateful for them. "Thank you for everything you've done. Let me know if you need anything."

Both nodded and Katelyn took her leave. Still full of questions, but a little soothed by the competence of her crew and her ability to rely on them.


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 03**

**If there was one thing Karin Chakwas admired about Miranda Lawson, it was her endurance.** Unlike the other crew members, she didn't work on a rotational schedule. She was always on duty, always prepared and always focused. Or that was the way it had been up until two weeks ago when they went to find her sister. In that day, Karin had seen the faintest crack in Miranda's attitude. She had come home that day, gone to her room and was unavailable for almost twenty-four hours. But, that was clearly a thing of the past. Despite working and monitoring both women for most of the night, Miranda had only allowed herself a few hours of rest before she came back to the infirmary.

Chakwas could tell that she had not gotten enough sleep by the tight lines around her eyes and she suspected that Miranda had gotten up with a headache but she was trying very hard to hide it. She had been prone to them ever since they returned from Illium.

_Gave you a lot to think about,_ Karin thought as she watched the Cerberus officer approach her desk. _Shepard, saving your sister's life. It really gave you something to think about._

She was privately pleased that Miranda bothered to smile at her as she drew nearer. The regard the woman had developed for the old Alliance officer was clear in her piercing blue eyes. They had not had an easy relationship, but Miranda was coming around.

"With your leave, Doctor," Miranda started. "I'm going retreat to my office. I have to look at the information of the mine before our debriefing with Shepard. Would you please monitor Helena's progress for me? And inform me of any change with Rinn?"

Chakwas nodded and returned her smile. She hadn't trusted Cerberus in the beginning, and a part of her still didn't, but she had begun to realise that she trusted _this_ woman. Because Miranda Lawson was loyal to Shepard. So, in a way, Karin was coming around as well.

"I will, Miranda," she said kindly. "And try to get some rest somewhere. You've been very busy."

The woman nodded, but didn't respond as she left the room. Chakwas watched Miranda through the windows until she was in her quarters before getting up and checking on Helena. She wanted to see the patient's progress for herself and didn't want to appear as if she was inspecting Miranda's work.

The red head had slept all night after her surgery. Miranda had spent a considerable amount of time working on her injury and Chakwas couldn't help but marvel at how _lucky_ the young woman was. Unless it got infected, Helena's injuries weren't life threatening. They would, however, have most certainly been crippling if they had been left in the wrong hands. There were very few people in the galaxy that had Miranda's skill and, if all worked out as planned, the young woman might only have the faintest brush of scars.

Much like those on Shepard's face.

Chakwas took a moment to study Miranda's work and was pleased with what she saw. After bringing Shepard back from the dead, this must've felt like a walk in the park to Miranda.

There was a beep from her station which immediately made Karin turn around to look at her monitors. She scanned their data and glanced at Rinn, realising that the younger woman's heart rate was rising. She hated doing it, but she took her pistol from her drawer and slipped it in behind her lab coat, sparing a glance at Legion who was standing in the corner. She too had taken a break from the infirmary and, when she returned the geth was just _there._ She didn't try and talk to it and had taken a lot of self-control not to take up a gun immediately. Rinn's awakening provided her with the perfect excuse.

The person on the bed was shifting awkwardly, her eyes roaming as she looked around the infirmary. When green eyes met Chakwas, she could immediately pick up on their fear and it soothed the doctor somewhat. From the doctor's experience, she knew that husks didn't show any kind of fear or self regard.

_Don't be silly Karin, it's not like turning into a zombie. She won't turn into a husk._

"Don't be afraid," Chakwas said as kindly as she could. "You're safe. You're Rinn, right? My name is Dr Karin Chakwas. I'm a physician on the Normandy, do you remember?"

The woman didn't answer her immediately, but reached out and pulled up the blankets with a trembling hand, her gaze never leaving Chakwas as she tried to sit up. Here, Karin moved quickly and held out her hand.

"I'd suggest you remain quiet, Rinn," she said levelly. "You were severely injured and have had surgery."

The young woman stopped moving immediately and hesitated, her hand once again creeping down to the blankets to pull them up. She looked embarrassed and uncomfortable and, for a moment, Chakwas wondered how much she was registering. Then, before she could ask another question, Rinn spoke up, her words slow and calculating.

"How did it go?" Rinn didn't look up, but fiddled with the blanket, her hands still trembling.

Chakwas smiled and pulled a chair closer as she glanced at the young woman's vital signs. _Normal, everything is normal._

"Better than expected," she said. "We had to repair more damage than anticipated, but there's no doubt that you'll make a full recovery, if things go according to plan."

Rinn took a moment to study the doctor, before she grimaced and looked to the other side of the room, pressing her body tighter into the bed. Her gaze grew distant and her mouth moved silently as she seemed to place her words together before uttering them.

"What was the problem?" she said, her tone still clear and slow. "There seemed to be a lot of concern."

Chakwas was very careful with her answer, but tried to be sincere. She didn't want to alarm her patient unnecessarily.

"You had lost a lot of blood," she said and that was the truth. "We had to deal with it very quickly. And Miranda was concerned about the foreign material found in your wound. It had fragmented and some of it had gotten stuck in your vein. It was..." She wondered how to explain it. "Pulled up like a blood clot, on its way to your heart. We had to do some exploring to find all the pieces. Are you in any pain?"

Rinn frowned at her and hesitated before she glanced down at the rest of her body. She was quiet for a full minute before she shrugged awkwardly. "I'm… uncomfortable?" she made it sound like a question, as if she was worried that she might be giving the wrong answer. "It's… burning. Throbbing. But… Not bad. Just…" She looked down, embarrassed. "More than I'm comfortable with."

Chakwas nodded and motioned to the side of the bed. "Let me show you how the pain medication works," she said. "You can regulate it yourself through these. The red button is for pain medication, the green for me. If you're uncomfortable, press the red. It will administer a measured dose, so you don't have to worry about overdosing. Don't be shy to use it, the more pain free you are, the quicker you'll recover." She paused.

"You two put up one hell of a fight."

Rinn immediately looked uncomfortable and crossed her arms over her chest, winching when the IV line pulled in her arm. "Didn't have much of a choice," she said defensively as if the violence that she had needed to keep her alive had shamed her. "Helen..." She froze and looked at Chakwas, wide eyed. Then, shaking, she tried to sit up and looked around the infirmary. "Where is she?" She breathed as Chakwas stood up quickly and pressed on her nearest shoulder. "Where is she? I haven't seen her!"

Chakwas strained to keep Rinn down, but held her hand in Legion's direction, hoping the geth understood the gesture.

"Rinn, relax," she said sharply. "If you move too much, you will hurt yourself." She prepared herself to snap again, but the force against her touch released immediately. Rinn stopped moving and looked at her with fearful green eyes. She was hardly breathing as she trembled under Chakwas's hand. Realising that she had to be far gentler with her than Miranda was with Helena, Chakwas let go of her and moved away from the bed, giving her some space.

"She's fine," Karin said softly, keeping her voice gentle as she stepped aside and motioned to a bed on the other side of the infirmary. "She's over there. We have to keep her in a sterile environment. Tell me, is there anybody that we can call for you? Family? Your employers?"

Rinn frowned at the question and blushed, playing with the blanket again as she pulled it up even higher across her stomach.

"No," she said. "No family for me. With Lena... I almost doubt it." She grew quiet and, for a moment, her green eyes burned like two hot coals as a thought struck her. "As for employers..." She shrugged and the coal receded, making her look very tired. "They're kinda dead, aren't they?"

_What __i__s i__n__ her tone__?_ Chakwas wondered. _Indifference? Anger?_

The doctor smiled at her and patted her arm. "It's alright then," she said softly. "We'll leave it till you can tell us where you want to go. I'm sorry about what you had to go through. If you need to talk, I'm here."

Rinn didn't look at her and shrugged. She seemed to settle deeper into the bed and finally pulled the blanket over her whole body. Chakwas, patting her knee, left her to sleep.

* * *

"_**I don't want to change, neither does Rinn." **_

"_Hopefully she won't have to." _

Helena opened her eyes and stared at the blurred image of the Normandy's infirmary. She did not try to move immediately, but brought up her one leg a little - uncomfortable, but not sore. _Which __i__s wrong,_ her body told her_. __I should be__ feeling pain. _

"_I can see her muscles moving!" _Rinn shouted in her memory. _"__On her __bones!__" _

_Rinn._

Helena, lying on her left side, tried to look around her and determine where she was. She moved with deliberate slow assessment. She was tired, sluggish. Drugged, she suspected. She had to be careful with her thoughts, her actions. She wanted to cry, but could not let herself.

"_If you behave yourself, they should take within a day or two and start working to replace the tissue you've lost."_

Behave.

She wondered what her back looked like. Whether the surgery was a success. _I don't mind scars…_ Shepard had some. _Not her Shepard._

_Behave._ Anger.

_I am not a child,_ Helena thought and tried to move as well as see what was right in front of her. _The basin,_ she thought. _Blurred. I need my glasses_. _I'm right across from Chakwas's station._ She glanced down and frowned.

_Something was wrong._

The air was… easy.

Helena reached forward and touched glass, the movement feeling as if it felt an age to complete. Her hand immediately made a ring of condensation on it and her heart skipped a beat.

_Glass. I'm in a glass coffin._

She almost screamed. Almost. At first, all she could do was stare at the condensation. Then, slowly, she looked up and reached out to touch the heaven. There was more glass.

_No._

Now, she _was_ going to scream. She took a deep breath, ready to let it out in a holler, but coughed instead. _I'm going to suffocate in here!_

"Helena, Helena relax…" Something moved _inside_ the glass, a black thing, reaching up to grab her. Strangle her. Helena, gasping for breath, daren't try and scream again until she felt something enclose around her wrist.

"Helena, relax."

Dr Chakwas.

Helena took a steadying breath and looked up at the old woman towering over her. The image was even more blurred and she realised suddenly that she had started crying and, immediately, she hated herself for her eyes' betrayal.

"Dr Chakwas," she breathed, not caring for the desperate familiarity in her name. "Where am I?" _Is it my voice? Trembling that much?_

The woman raised an eyebrow and, through the black, rubber-like material, she squeezed her hand. "I'm surprised you remember my name," she said softly, conversationally.

Helena didn't want to talk about it. "_Where_ am I? What did you do to me?" She didn't care about anything else, she _needed_ to know why she was in a coffin. She couldn't be soothed until she had all the facts. Chakwas sensed it immediately and her eyes became a little bit less appeasing.

"You're in an oxygen tank," she explained. "It's to help set the first phase of the grafts on your back. We need you to be in as sterile an environment as possible. Are you comfortable?"

Helena didn't bother thinking what an oxygen tank might be, she just knew that she wanted to get out of it.

"I want out," she breathed immediately, her voice hoarse and insistent. "I… I need… Please…" She blinked suddenly and realised that there was _something_ she had forgotten. Something she had just thought of. "My glasses." She hated not being able to focus.

Chakwas raised an eyebrow and smiled at her, pulling a chair closer so that she could sit down without letting go of Helena's hand. It was like being in an incubator where there were two holes cut in for the people _outside._ _Gods, anybody can touch me and I won't be able to get away..._

"Professor Solus is fixing them for you. He said that the lenses were quite scratched. Why haven't you had them looked at?"

Helena blinked and tried to figure out how to answer that question. "My glasses?" she asked stupidly, thinking. "They work." _I have to get out._

Chakwas looked at her amused and shook her head. "Your eyes," she pointed out. "It's so easily corrected. I haven't seen anybody wear a set of specs in… Ages. As a fashion statement maybe, but not a pair as archaic as yours."

_Archaic?_ Helena sniffed, insulted and her anger returned.

"They're mine," she said. "Don't let the salarian break them or so help me…" She didn't know how to finish that threat. Then, suddenly, what she had forgotten came back to her and she went cold.

"Rinn?" she queried. "How is Erinn?"

The older woman raised an eyebrow. "Is that her full name?" she queried. "She's still resting, recovering like you. She woke up a while ago. She'll be fine."

_You're lying._

Helena didn't know how she knew it, but she _knew_ this woman. She had spent countless hours getting into the heads of her characters through various fictions and she had always had a feeling for Dr Chakwas. She tried to shift into a more comfortable position, but she couldn't. She didn't want to think about all the tubes that were stuck in her to keep her _sustained_ within this glass prison.

"And that husk fragment?" she queried. "Is all of it out? What's happening?" She tried to imagine an answer into being, like she would a story, but nothing was happening. Instead, she saw Dr Chakwas shrug and smile.

"Nothing at the moment," she said. "She's recovering, just like you are supposed to be doing. You need to get some rest Helena. It takes a lot of energy for the body to accept and convert the graft. The first layer is always the hardest, the most difficult to change."

Helena squeezed Chakwas's hand as hard as she could. It was silly, but it was the only way that she could bring the desperateness of her emotions across.

"Dr Chakwas, will she change into one of those things?" She thought of her own wound for a second and the image of zombies came to mind. "Will I?" _Am I being irrational?_

The doctor shook her head. "You're going to be fine Helena," she said. "But, you have to relax…"

Helena's patience finally snapped.

"DON'T KEEP SAYING THAT!" she barked. "For fuck's sake, tell me what's wrong with her!" She saw a look cross Dr Chakwas's features, a thought. It was like reading her mind. "And don't sedate me."

The woman raised an eyebrow and relaxed the grip she had on her hand. "Well then, my dear, you have to start behaving."

Again that word. Helena fumed, but took a steadying breath and closed her eyes to reorganise her thoughts, to keep herself from losing her temper. She felt fragmented within herself, her body devoid of pain, but her mind drifting. She had always prided herself in the ability she had to control her faculties, to enslave her own mind. She never got drunk, never allowed herself to speak without thinking and this... This was too close to all of that. She had to focus, be calm...

_You're all going to die down here._

The red queen from Resident Evil.

She opened her eyes and used thoughts of a movie to anchor her, to steady her mind and build herself into the person she used to be for the job she hated, the one she wrote to get away from.

"How long do I have to be… in here?" she queried, keeping her voice neutral and making sure to meet Dr Chakwas's gaze as calmly as she could. Dr Chakwas noticed her change and raised an eyebrow, a small smile coming to the corner of her mouth.

"Two days," she said. "Officer Lawson will evaluate your progress in a few hours."

Helena made sure not to show any more reaction than she needed to when she gave Dr Chakwas a questioning look. "And Officer Lawson is the expert then?" she queried. "What's..." _Stars, do I want to know?_ "What's the prognosis? I mean..."

The doctor smiled. "I know what prognosis means," she said gently and Helena blushed. The older woman considered her words for a few moments ,then squeezed Helena's hand.

"The grafts will start acting as substitutes for your body's cells. Muscle, nerves, tendons. They are all pre-programmed to start replacing the tissue you lost. It's a long process, but you're in the right hands. You are _very_ lucky to be here. We have the right facilities to deal with these sorts of injuries." _Because they had to be prepared to work with Shepard__,__ if her implants started failing._ Helena closed her eyes and tried not to think too hard about the fact that the cells, that were currently working to rebuild her back, were _also_ used to reanimate a corpse.

"And Rinn," she said levelly, making sure not to show any signs of distress. "Is she conscious at the moment?"

Dr Chakwas shook her head. "She was an hour or so ago. Her recovery is on track." _So neutral, so good at avoiding the subject._ Helena looked at her and tried to imagine how she could turn the conversation in the direction she wanted it to go.

"Asking to see her will be useless, wouldn't it?" She queried. "Is she in a box as well?" She could not keep the dry acid from her voice and Dr Chakwas's gaze became sharper again.

"It would," she said. "We're taking a different approach with her treatment, so she's in the general ward. Right over there," she pointed in a direction Helena couldn't look. "When you two are awake at the same time, I'll bring her closer. Would you like that?"

Anger brushed over the distance that Helen had tried to form in her mind and she knew that her smile was anything but friendly. "That would be kind," she said dryly and swallowed, her mouth dry. She was starting to feel sick, her head throbbing with panic and distress. She wanted to ask them about Rinn, but, for the moment, didn't have the courage to face whatever they could tell her. Unable to shake the feeling that Dr Chakwas was seeing _too much__,_ she closed her eyes and swallowed again. The world began to fade without warning and, when she felt the hand moving in hers, she opened her eyes quickly, forcing herself awake.

Chakwas had stood up, a gesture she didn't even notice and was looking at her kindly.

"I'm sorry..." Helena muttered. "I'm... tired."

Dr Chakwas nodded, withdrawing her hand. "You need sleep, Helena," she said. "You have to tell us if there's anybody that we can contact for you, be it your employers or your family."

Helena didn't think about her family, but in her mind's eye she was suddenly back in the corridor, hauling a limping Rinn beside her. _Let us reach it in time,_ she had thought, focusing on reaching the door, watching the lab coat of the young lab assistant in front of them as she ran as well. _Just be open. Let us get outside._ What had the girl's name been? Penny? She had been younger than them and had died screaming… Crying… Begging for their help.

Anger burned inside her and she couldn't stop it.

"You can fuck my employers," she snapped, her heart beat climbing. "They left us down there to die! They wouldn't wait for us, wouldn't give us an extra _ten minutes_ to reach the top. Fuck them. Fuck them all."

She winched suddenly when she felt a cramp in her chest and immediately pushed her thumb against it, coughing as she did so. Dr Chakwas glanced at some data just beyond her sight, looking concerned.

"I think you need some rest, Helena," she said. "I don't want you upsetting yourself. Your body's not ready yet. Just take a deep breath, the cramp will pass in a moment." She pushed her hand through the glove again and touched her wrist. Helena pulled away from it, feeling flushed and still in pain.

"I'm fine…" she breathed. "Really." She swallowed and closed her eyes. "There's nobody you can contact, Dr Chakwas. It's just me and Rinn. Here." She opened her eyes again and took a deep breath. "I think I'm going to sleep. For a bit. If that's alright."

Kindly, Dr Chakwas responded almost in a whisper.

"That's alright, Helen. Sleep well." The black fingers of the glove brushed her palm before it retreated and Helena could finally close her eyes.

And dream of husks.

* * *

**When she was a child, Helena had had a severe sleeping problem. **She had been kept all night by unwanted conversations that seemed to spring up inside her mind, unbidden and unwelcome. It was only when she started giving them names, identities and eventually putting them down to paper that it went away. It was what had driven her to start writing and what had always kept her writing – because if she didn't, the voices returned.

Now, walking beside Rinn, Helena was sure that she had gone mad and that this was all part of some delusion brought on by her inability to separate reality from fiction.

_What was it that Richard Bach had said?_ She wondered as she looked at the people with them. They were all dressed in the same uniform clothes, practical and not necessarily uncomfortable. And they were all being watched, there were Blue Suns guards everywhere. Not threatening exactly, just... around. Nobody expected these people to give any resistance. Because they were here for work.

And, Helena suspected, none of them had slept well.

She had listened to them in the darkness from her bunk bed, listening to their mutters and whispers. It was a strange echo to those she had found in her own head.

_If you practice being fictional for a while you'll find that characters can become more real than people._

_This,_ Helena suspected, _was not what Richard Bach had had in mind._

She didn't need to look at Rinn to know that she too had slept badly.

_This isn't a dream._

_Then what is it?_

They were in an elevator, moving down into the heart of the facility. Helena had gotten moved from Rinn's side and found herself standing next to a tense looking Blue Suns merc. She recognized the distant look in the woman's eyes and the way she almost refused to see the people around her.

_I don't want to get to know you, I might have to shoot you..._

But, it was something else as well. There was something bothering this woman and she kept touching her gun. Helena studied the gesture and glanced around to see that Rinn was three people away from her, her features tensed as they pressed against her. Helena, being next to the mercenary, had more space to move. She turned back to the woman and studied her armour, her weapons and the sun emblem on her breast plate. She was studying the faint tattoo that was visible on the woman's hands, when those hands moved suddenly and grabbed her by her shirt.

"Do you have a problem?" The merc growled, pulling her closer so they were face-to-face.

Helena flinched at the touch and tried to jerk away from her but the woman's grip was surprisingly strong. She wanted to react, but then she heard Rinn curse behind her.

"Shit, Lena..."

Helena glanced back at her and held up a hand, signalling her to stop. Everybody in the elevator was looking at them and the mercenary wasn't the only one with a gun.

"Easy," Helena said, trying to still her heart. "I was just looking. You look tense."

The woman growled at her, pushed her away and gave her a surprisingly fast slap behind the head. "Eyes to the front," she barked. "You're not a fucking tourist."

_No,_ Helena thought, her head ringing from the clout. She pushed back to Rinn's side, rubbing the back of her head. _I'm a gamer._

When she was close to her friend, Rinn grabbed her shirt and pulled her closer. The crowd around them allowed this shift and Helena got the impression that they had sympathy with Rinn for being saddled up with her.

"What are you doing?" Rinn hissed when she was within earshot. "Goeie donner, Helena..."

Helen turned back to her and shrugged. "Just looking," she said even though a part of her wanted to point out to Rinn that _something_ was wrong. But she didn't and the elevator moved down to an impossible depth. Helena felt her own panic beginning to surface, but knew that it sprung from the press of bodies against her and the claustrophobic feeling of being underground.

_Imagine it's a space station, not a mine._

She shivered suddenly, the knot of panic pulling tighter. _Why?_ _And why a mine? What's significant of it?_

They were bustled out when the elevator stopped. The person escorting them was a no-nonsense type of man that put Helena in the mind of a head master. There were people waiting for them at the bottom as well and they started barking out numbers – calling for those people to follow them. Helena glanced back to see that the merc was hanging back, her gaze following a woman in a white lab coat that was coming their way. She kept expecting to hear her and Rinn's numbers, but luckily, they weren't called or separated. Only a small group of people were left and they stood together in an awkward cluster, also watching the woman approach.

Helena looked at her and frowned, studying her body language. There was something... off. She found herself moving in between Rinn and the woman, unable to describe her unease. The woman's eyes were too bright.

"Are you for me?" she said. "Wonderful. I'm Dr Anna Holm, you have been chosen to work on our great project. Come, come with me. I will show you." Even her words sounded too bright.

Before she could turn around and walk off, the merc cleared her throat. "Dr Holm?"

The woman turned to the other, a flash of irritation clear in her eyes, but then she relaxed and smiled at the merc. "Yes?"

The mercenary frowned at her and Helena couldn't help but wonder if she had seen the same brightness that Helena had.

"Doctor, I'm First Lieutenant Ramsey. Do you mind if I accompany you to Sector 21? My people have not checked in this morning. Clearly there's not cause for alarm, but... I want to see what they are up to."

Helena immediately turned to study the doctor's face and found it alarmingly unreadable. _She knows what she's talking about__,__ but she's not going to offer an explanation. _

_What's the damned significance of the mine?! _

"Of course, Lieutenant," Dr Holm crooned. "Please, come with me."

Helena didn't like the woman's tone and she could tell that the mercenary didn't either. The woman's hand dropped to her pistol and she seemed to check the gun on her back. The group fell in behind the two women, Helena studying the mercenary's guns and Rinn walking hunched, her arms crossed over her chest as if she was in pain. For her sake, Helena winked at her and moved forward with a bit more confidence, although she could not take her eyes from the woman's guns.

It was darker on this level of the mine and the group instinctively seemed to move closer together. The woman leading them seemed to notice and glanced back to smile at them brightly.

"Oh, I have to apologise," Dr Holm said to them. "We're still setting up this section. We've made a very interesting discovery this past month. Our mining unearthed a mysterious object, a... a very fascinating artefact. Possibly from the time of the protheans."

Rinn and Helena looked up as one, frowning at the mention of the artefact. Helena saw the question in Rinn's eyes, but knew that her friend would not find the courage to speak up so she decided to do it for her.

"Do you mean a prothean beacon?" She queried. "Such as... The one on Eden Prime?"

Dr Holm paused and glanced back at her, her gaze searching. When their eyes met Helena was once again struck by the fact that something was really off about her.

"We believe so," she said calmly and looked at the mercenary. "Please, follow me." She started walking again when Rinn spoke up suddenly, her voice uncharacteristically low even though it travelled quite well.

"Have you seen anything?"

The woman looked back at the two of them and cocked her head to the side, studying them. "What are your num... Names?" She queried and Helena felt a moment's anger over something she shouldn't have been. These people were so... condescending. _What are your numbers? Really?!_

"Helena," she spoke up loudly. "And Rinn." She motioned to her friend. "We're new."

Dr Holm gave them a curious look and nodded to herself. "When the others go down, you two can stay with me," she said. "I'll show you what this is all about. You seem to have some experience."

Helena met her gaze squarely and nodded, not daring to look away lest the woman thought that she had the upper hand over them. Dr Holm in turn met her look with a smile and carried on walking, leading them deeper towards the supposed artefact. She felt Rinn shift beside her and thought that her friend would reach out and touch her, but the woman didn't.

"Helena," she said softly. "I don't like this."

She nodded, she had to. Not even Helena could hide how uneasy she felt about all of this, but she could also not help but think that they _had_ to see what this woman wanted to show them. _Prothean beacon in a mine?_

"I don't think we'll have a choice," she said to her friend and glanced at the merc whose face was very stoic. Helena could tell that she was searching for something and, when she thought about it a moment, she realised that the woman was probably looking for the other _guards._ Until now, every level that they had been on had one or two guards always within shouting distance. Here, there was nobody.

_Maybe they're on a break._

Somehow, Helena didn't think that it was true.

They stopped at the end of the dimly lid corrider; the air humid and more pressing than before. Dr Holm waved at her and Rinn to join her and, after some consideration, motioned to Ramsey to join them as well. They were standing at the foot of a staircase that went up a level. Dr Holm put her omnitool against the panel and opened the door, showing the others into the dimly lid room. There was a hum of machinery from inside, but other than that, Helena couldn't see anything in the din.

"My coordinator will meet you inside and assign you your tasks," Dr Holm said to the people. "I would like to thank you in advance for the contribution that you will be making to my research."

The people weren't necessarily bothered by her words and shuffled into the gloom, the door closing behind them the moment the last one was through. Helena stared at them, her mind screaming at her that they shouldn't have gone inside. She felt Rinn shift beside her and saw the way her friend's hands clenched in her new shirt. She too must've sensed it, must've felt the foreboding sensation of horror that was starting to creep up through the walls. When the door closed, Helena felt as if someone had cut the power and they were alone, in the dark.

With a mad woman and another with a gun.

"Well," Dr Holm said, sounding relieved. "Now that that's done, let me show you two what we have. I remember your numbers - your names. You weren't listed on this facilities register yet, here you are." She smiled at them, sweetly. "We had thought that you would be better suited for this research," she indicated to the door. "But, with your apparent knowledge of the Eden Prime situation, it might be worth it to see if you can hold some other value." She glanced at Helena. "Your test scores came back quite high. Follow me, please. Lieutenant, you can come as well, I will show you where your people are. They are being utilised to oversee the transfer of the workers."

To Helena's surprise, Ramsey actually turned to her to meet her gaze, the woman's dark eyes puzzled. "It's my understanding that the workers are generally compliant," she said and then followed Dr Holm up the stairs. "This section is very dark."

Helena could not see the look on Anna Holm's face as she shrugged. "We trust that there would be no danger from the ground," she said in a light voice. "And it's crucial to save power, some of the systems we have linked up to the artefact is utilising quite a lot of energy. We would hate to compromise the mining. It is, at the end of the day, what is funding this whole operation. And your company's contract." She glanced back to smile at Ramsey and Helena saw the woman touch her gun again.

They didn't move up far, stopping on a dark landing. There was a vacant monitoring station that Helena suspected was Dr Holm's workspace. Holm went over to put on one of the desk lamps and turned to smile at Helena and Rinn.

"Where do you two come from?" She queried. "You are not like the other workers. You are not sheep, even though you pretend to be."

_Two conversations,_ Helena thought. _And the good doctor picks up on it. What's with this place?_

"We're just workers," she replied and looked at the wall that would look over the artefact, but found that it was a closed panel. "We're just like the others." She tried to smile lightly to give truth to the lie, but the woman clearly did not believe her.

"No," Dr Holm murmured and went to a console, pressing a few commands. "I don't think you are."

Her commands raised the wall panel which Helena had suspected was a window. Unconsciously, Helena held her breath, shoving her hands into the pockets of her pants to keep them from trembling with anticipation.

"So," Dr Holm queried, seemingly happily oblivious to the mood that they were in. "You two were at Eden Prime?"

Neither of them answered, their gazes fixed on the rising panel.

"Do you know of the visions?"

Helena turned her gaze to the woman, hearing the hunger in her voice. She didn't answer, but frowned at her.

"Do you?" She queried in return. "Have you seen anything?"

The doctor smiled at her and Rinn shifted, moving herself closer to Helena and the woman, as if she expected her to be some sort of threat.

"Why yes," she said. "I have. Have a look Lieutenant, you're people are fine but busy. Please, take the message to those upstairs."

Helena involuntarily turned her gaze to the window and saw that the Blue Suns mercs were standing with a group of slightly puzzled workers. Each of them were being searched through and led off to a section Helena couldn't see. The Lieutenant frowned at them and tapped the window, trying to get her crew mates' attention. They didn't pay the noise any mind, but continued to idly move with the workers.

"What have you seen?" Rinn queried, her voice tight with panic. She too was watching the spectacle, her gaze moving to another panel that had not yet been opened. When Helena looked at it, she felt herself shiver and she remembered the murmurs that she had heard in her sleep the night before.

_Whispers in my mind..._

It all fell into place. Helen moved, quickly, startling both the doctor and Ramsey who had grudgingly turned to leave.

"What's behind this panel?" she queried. "Show us the artefact."

Dr Holm raised a brow at her demands and shook her head. "Patience," she said with a small smile. "There are a few things I want to discuss with you first. Please, Lieutenant Ramsey, you can take your leave."

Helena immediately looked to the mercenary, meeting her gaze. Something passed between then, an unspoken word between two strangers that had the same idea at exactly the same time. Like lightening, Ramsey pulled her pistol and levelled it on the surprised doctor.

"Do as she says, Doctor," the woman hissed. "Now."

The doctor looked between them, still very surprised. "Now what is all of this about?" she said. "Lieutenant, please lower your weapon. What's the meaning of this?"

Ramsey couldn't answer her but looked back to Helena who had moved closer to the panel. She made sure to keep the mercenary's gaze, realizing for a precious moment that she had the woman's command.

"Open this panel and show us what the artefact looks like," she snapped. "We don't need to give you a reason. She's got the bloody gun."

"Lena..."

Helena glanced at Rinn who was looking at the window. The seeming tranquil movement below them had stopped and now every single one of the mercenaries were looking up at them. The people they had moved into the room were standing around awkwardly, unsure of what to do.

"Lieutenant," Dr Holm crooned again. "Please, just drop the gun. I think it would be better to focus your attention on our two vagabonds here. They seemed to know and awful lot of this facility for people who's just arrived."

Helena immediately snapped her attention to Ramsey, seeing her gaze become a bit vague. And, she felt... something. Like a scratching sensation in the back of her mind.

"Ramsey," she snapped and motioned to Rinn to watch Holm. "Don't listen to her. Listen to yourself. I can tell you're feeling it too. Please Ramsey, look at me..."

With a seemingly inhuman effort the mercenary tore her gaze away from Dr Holm and looked at Helena. Realising that she had her attention again Helena opened her mouth to speak, but suddenly Holm launched herself at Ramsey. The lieutenant swung her gun to the woman, but it was too late. Rinn had moved, no, launched herself at Holm, bearing her to the ground. The doctor started struggling, but Rinn held onto her, pulling her upright and dragging her to the console. Helena felt a moment's elation but it didn't last long when something launched itself at the glass with an inhuman cry.

Helena couldn't help but let out a yelp in surprise, jumping back from the console and Ramsey turned her weapon and fired. A web like crack appeared on the glass, giving the creature perched on it a spiderlike appearance.

It yelled and snapped at them, its claws tearing marks on the window.

Inhuman claws but...

"It's a husk!" Rinn yelled, still struggling with the fighting doctor. "Helena it's a husk!"

"Fuck the husk," Helena yelled and moved to grab Ramsey's arm. "It's a reaper artefact! They're studying a reaper artefact! Ramsey, we have to go!"

The lieutenant turned to her in horror, convinced for the moment that the creature wasn't going to come through the glass. She was about to speak when several shots rang out from below. More spiderlike webs appeared on the glass and it was immediately clear that Ramsey's people below weren't shooting on the husk but on her.

Ramsey stared at them in horror, then at the husk that was still trying to tear through the window.

"Those men..."

"They're indoctrinated!" Rinn shouted. "We have to move! Helena!"

"I know!" Helena snapped and grabbed Ramsey by the shoulders, her stomach cold. _Mine. Abandoned mine. That was the significance of it. I had played this mission..._

"Ramsey, we have to go! We have to get out of here!" More shots followed and this time Helena saw a splinter of glass break away from the window. The husk, now joined by another, seemed to see it too and started focusing on the spot, tearing at it.

"What the fuck is that?!" Ramsey demanded, pulling away from Helena's grip so that she could move to Holm, grabbing the woman from Rinn's arms. She had stopped struggling and was looking at them with a terrifying light in her eyes.

"You're future," the woman whispered with a laugh. "The future. The visions have shown me. Uniformity. Solace. You don't understand..."

Ramsey gave her a rough shake. "Why are my men shooting at me?!"

The woman grinned at her. "They're not your men anymore," she hissed. Helena didn't give her time to talk anymore, but grabbed Ramsey, forcing her to look at her.

"Lieutenant," she snapped. "If we stay here, we're going to die. I've seen those things. On Eden Prime. On Horizon. They're going to kill us!" A thought struck her and she went cold. "They're going to come through the door!"

Ramsey seemed to struggle for a moment, then blinked and stepped back, pulling her gun again and without warning, shot Holm in the head. The gunshot's sound was somehow worse than before and Helena watched in mute horror as Holm's knees simply buckled underneath her and she fell back, her ruined face hitting the console with a sickening thud.

Rinn made a soft, strangled sound; her eyes wide and horrified as she stared at the mess.

"She's the only one with access from this side," the lieutenant said coldly. "Come on, we have to go and get my other men."

She turned around and started running back towards the elevator and Helena, nauseous with what she saw, grabbed Rinn and followed her. It took a sharp tug for her to get her friend moving, the woman's gaze still transfixed on the body. The small splinter of glass had become a hole and a whole group of husks were now tearing at it, the edges of the glass dark with their now inhuman blood.

_How long have they been feeding __the artefact__?_ Helena thought. _How long have they been bringing people down here? How many of those things were there?_

The door was mercifully closed when they reached the bottom of the staircase and started running up the hallway. Helena glanced behind her, her brain buzzing with the sensation she had felt before. _Reapers, gods, it's the reapers... Save us..._

It was hard to keep Rinn moving and she stepped in behind her, pushing her friend ahead of her, forcing the stricken woman to run. Ramsey was shouting orders into her radio as she moved, speaking to one of her commanders topside.

"Yes!" she was shouting. "I think we need to evac the facility now! Till we know what the fuck these scientists have been up to! Yes, sir!"

Helena hoped that they meant everybody.

There was a stomach turning sound of glass breaking behind them and suddenly the corridor was filled with a sound that Helena knew very well.

_Husks!_ She thought panicked and ran faster. _They're out!_

They reached the elevator, but it wasn't on the floor level. Helena and Rinn stopped beside Ramsey, their breathing ragged. Helena saw Ramsey check the thermal clips on her pistol and held out her hand, remembering the woman's shot gun.

"I can shoot," she said. "Please, give me your gun!"

The lieutenant considered it for a second before she shoved the pistol into Helena's waiting hands grabbing her shotgun as she did so. Rinn meanwhile stumbled to the console, calling down the elevator. The thought of it made Helena sick, because she _remembered_ how long it had taken them to get this far down.

"What the fuck do you know about these things?" Ramsey demanded. "How did you know?"

Helena took a second to familiarise herself with the gun, but soon realised that the basic principle of it had remained the same for _centuries_. Just point and shoot.

"Saw it on Eden Prime," Helena said as she saw the faint glow of the husks' eyes and machinery at the end of the corridor. _Stars, save us..._ "Saw it on Horizon. What they had been studying... It brainwashed your people. Like the spectre Saren. If they come through we have to shoot them all!"

_What am I saying?_

Ramsey didn't look as if she had heard as she squinted down the corridor. Without warning her, she threw the shotgun in Rinn's direction and took another pistol from her armour. "What are those things?" She snapped as Rinn fumbled with the shotgun. There was a sound of machinery from above them and Helena began to have hope that the elevator would arrive before they all died.

"Husks," Rinn breathed. "Husks... You shot her."

Ramsey gave Rinn a very dry look and raised her pistol to her sights. Helena, taking her lead, did the same and began to follow the lights as they moved down towards them. She couldn't quite pick them out in the semi darkness, but instinctively knew where she had to shoot. Right between the two faint orbs...

Ramsey was the first to fire and Helena, having picked a target in sight, did the same. She didn't know how much gun proficiency Rinn had, but didn't dare look to see what her friend was doing with the shotgun. _Keep it till they're close, keep it..._

The elevator doors opened just as Helena shot her third husk and the horde became clearly visible.

"Fall back!" Ramsey yelled and Helena found herself moving backwards into the elevator. Rinn had slipped in before them and was at the console, ready to hit the close button. "Don't shoot when the door closes!"

_Of course not,_ Helena thought but said nothing, her attention focused on finding another fast approaching target. Not for the first time in her life she found herself immensely thankful that her father had been a keen gun enthusiast and had insisted that both his children learn to shoot as soon as they could sensibly string three sentences together.

_Preparing us for the zombie apocalypse my brother had always joked... Joke__'__s on me now._

When the doors closed she let her arms fall and watched as Ramsey pushed past Rinn and hit the up key.

"Give us more time," she said into her radio. "For god's sake, Stephan, you know how long it takes. Yes... Yes... I don't have a fucking idea."

She stopped talking and turned to them. Rinn had leaned against the wall and looked as if she wanted to drop the shotgun. Helena got the impression that Ramsey was studying them properly for the first time. She didn't say anything, but let out a slow breath and reloaded her pistol. After some consideration she handed Helena a series of thermal clips as well. Helena wasted no time to try and figure out how they worked as Ramsey went to Rinn who had now sank down against the wall with the shotgun resting on her lap. She looked as if she was ready to throw up.

"Do you know how to shoot?" the merc queried, her voice harsh. "Hey!" She gave Rinn a clout next to the ear to bring her focus back. Helena found herself baring her teeth at the merc, but didn't say anything immediately, realising that they might need her. And, it had gotten Rinn's attention. She looked up at Ramsey with bright eyes filled with panic. Helena could see her struggle to formulate words, to focus. Then, she nodded slowly, but grimaced.

"Reload," Rinn began. "I ah... I don't know how to reload. The rest is... This is a shot gun... just point and shoot."

Ramsey nodded, but gave her a suspicious look. "And not when we're in the vicinity," she pointed out. "This one's got a mean kick and spray. Don't shoot one of us. I'll make you regret it..."

Rinn nodded and handed her the shotgun so that she could show her how to reload it. The merc did so slowly and deliberately, then handed Rinn an extra set of clips and turned to Helena.

"You good?"

Helena had managed to get her hands around the mechanism and nodded. "Yes, I just need more clips," she pointed out. "What's happening? What are they doing at the top?"

Ramsey sneered, but answered reluctantly. Helena figured that the woman owed them in some way and hoped that she felt it.

_Don't think about this,_ she told herself. _Don't think about what just happened._

"We'll sound an evac," she pointed out. "Get everybody out of the facility and then send in a trained team to see what's going on. Does that sound like a good idea?" The last she said with a touch a venom.

Helena grimaced and thought about the game. She remembered what this was now and she was furious with herself for not thinking about it earlier. On an N7 mission, Shepard came to an abandoned mine and found a reaper artefact. They found no survivors, but found the artefact...

_No survivors..._

_Shepard will come for us._

The two thoughts seemed to come in collision with each other and she forced them both from her mind.

"I think we have to get out of this place," she said. "I think everything that relates to that idea is awesome. Fantastic even."

She knew she had hit the spot when Ramsey smiled at her. "Great," she said. "You two stick close to me, I want to know everything that you do about..."

The elevator jerked and the floor beneath them trembled. Rinn shot up like lightening, fumbling with her gun and then pointing it at the floor.

"It's on the elevator!" Ramsey yelled in surprise. "It's below us! Fuck!"

Helena didn't point her gun at the floor, but found her heart clenching painfully. _Fuck__,__ fuck__,__ fuck_. The trembling increased and Helena could imagine a million husks banging on the floor, trying to get in. _How did they get up so quickly?!_

"What do we do?" She asked Ramsey who was looking at the floor with a wild expression. She had her hand on her gun, but wasn't pointing it down either.

"We have to ride this up as far as it goes," she said and motioned to Rinn to step away from the console. "This elevator doesn't go all the way to the top. It only interconnects with another one near the middle. We have... a few more floors to go. This is the only one. It's this or the stairs."

Helena imagined that she felt a thud underneath her foot and shifted again. "Any chance your friends will come down to help us?"

Ramsey shook her head and, for a second, the world felt very, very small.

"We have to get to that second elevator."

Helena watched the mercenary as she moved to the console, her gaze fixed on the numbers. She didn't have the courage to ask her how many levels they still had to go and fixed her attention on the floor, praying that the husks won't be able to come through it. She tried not to think about the fact that she was in an elevator or even in something that might read like horror fiction. All she was focused on was the hope that the husks wouldn't come into the small space with them. The floor seemed to be solid enough though and despite the muted cries and scrapings that they heard, the husks didn't seem capable of tearing through the machinery.

Helena was just about to relax when the elevator lurched suddenly and came to a complete stop. Seconds later, the lights flickered out.

"No!" Ramsey cried in frustration. "No, no, no! Damn it!"

Helena, who had never been fond of elevators, could not mute the terrified moan that escaped her lips. She heard another's ragged breathing in the darkness and knew that Rinn was as terrified as she was. There was a pause and suddenly a light sprang to life within the elevator. Helena blinked twice then saw that it was Ramsey's omnitool that was the source. It dawned on her immediately that she'd be able to do it with the omnitool they had given her as well, but she had no idea where to start.

She didn't say anything as Ramsey ran a diagnostic on the elevator, then tried to get it moving again.

"The power's been cut!" she breathed. "It's difficult to say from what. We're just two levels from where we should be!"

There was a squawk from her radio, barely audible. Helena didn't say anything as Ramsey turned her back to them, speaking into her microphone.

"Captain, please, we've run into a situation... What?!" Helena's stomach sank at the horror in the woman's voice. "No, sir! I have no fucking idea how this could've happened! There were some in the passages below us but... The upper levels? They can't move that fast!"

_They're out..._ Helena thought. _The husks are out. They've been waiting for this moment. They could probably come out of that level from the start and have been waiting for the artefact's signal._

She closed her eyes and tried to still her rising panic.

_Wake up, _she thought futilely. _Wake up, please..._

When she opened up her eyes again she saw Rinn looking at her in the dim light, the conversation between Ramsey and her superior dim and incomprehensible.

"Lena..." Rinn started, then faltered when there was another serious bump from the floor. Helena looked down at the floor below them then up at the ceiling.

"We..." She started. "We have to get out of here."

"Sir! There won't be enough time!" Ramsey shouted, the conversation coming into focus again. "There won't be time!"

There was a loud blaring alarm suddenly from somewhere above their head. _"All personnel__,__ proceed to the exit__s immediately__," _a mechanical voice blared_. "This is a code red evacuation. All personnel, proceed to the exit__s immediately__. Facility lockdown will commence in T minus twenty minutes. This is a code red evacuation, repeat – a code red evacuation. Full protocol activation for code red will commence in T minus twenty minutes. All personnel, proceed to the exit__s__immediately__." _

Helena did not like the look on Ramsey's face as she looked at the ceiling, her eyes white with fear. She didn't bother talking to her captain anymore, but was looking around the elevator, an edge of hysteria in her gaze.

"What's a code red evacuation?" Rinn asked, her voice hoarse in the semi darkness. "How can they evacuate everybody in twenty minutes?"

"They can't!" Ramsey snapped. "There's not enough time! We HAVE to get out of here! You!" She pointed to Helena. "Come here!" There was a flash in her omnitool light and when Helena stepped up to her, Ramsey shoved a knife into her hands and then interlocked her own fingers.

"There's a hatch on the roof!" she said, nodding her head up at the ceiling. "You, mountain, help me steady her! We only need to climb up two levels! Just two!"

Helena gaped at her for a second, then blinked and put the knife between her teeth, not needing more of an explanation. She put her hands on the mercenary's shoulders and her foot into the stirrup of her hands. She didn't get much time to steady herself, because Ramsey immediately pushed her up into the air. Helena in turn did her best to jump and lighten the load as well. She almost toppled, but then another pair of hands steadied her and she could reach the roof without falling backwards. Helen glanced down briefly to see the whites of Rinn's eyes as her friend secured her grip on her belt. She smiled at her briefly and took the knife from her mouth, feeling along the ceiling until she found a ridge. Struggling to keep her balance, she felt both Rinn and Ramsey shift their grips to keep her more secure. She didn't waste any more time, pushing the knife in between the two panels to try and shift them. It took some maneuvering, but she managed to open it up a slit and get her hand in. It threatened to pinch her fingers, but she put the knife back in her mouth and hooked her other hand around the edge.

"Lemme go!" she mouthed around the knife. "Dwop me!"

She tried to squirm out of their grips even before they stepped away from her. Ramsey did so first with Rinn only a second behind her. Helena had pulled herself up against the panel and, when they let her go, gave the panel a hard jerk. It broke loose, falling to the floor next to them with a loud clash and letting in the faint glow of the elevator shaft's light.

"Excellent!" Ramsey breathed as she helped Helena up. "Now let's..."

A shape fell through the hole and into the elevator, screeching as it did so. Helena had time to yell in surprise when Ramsey suddenly grabbed her and threw her to the floor. There was an ear splitting explosion and Helena was only vaguely aware of a brief shimmer around them as Ramsey's shield blocked the assault. The creature fell screeching, withering on the ground. There was a click as Rinn cocked her shotgun, a pause as she took aim and then another explosion as she shot off the husk's head.

Helena pushed Ramsey off of her and looked at the mess, the mercenary already shooting up as well and training her pistol at the hole. Rinn was staring at the mess, at the dark bits of human and machine like matter that was spread across the floor. She was trembling, her hands shaking so much Helena was surprised she could hold onto the gun.

"Rinn ,it's okay," she said quickly and became faintly aware of the mechanical voice speaking in the distance. "_Facility lockdown in T minus eighteen minutes. All personnel__,__ proceed to the exits__ immediately__. This is a code red evacuation..." _

"Rinn?"

Helena put a hand on Rinn's and purposefully stepped over the body and into her line of sight. "It's okay Rinn, it's gonna be okay..."

"Red!" Ramsey snapped. "That seems to have been the only one. We need to haul you up onto the roof then you can help us out!"

Helena only had time to briefly make eye contact with Rinn before her sense of panic drove her back to Ramsey. The mercenary had adopted the same pose as before and this time when Helena stepped into her hands the woman pushed her all the way up to the roof. She grabbed the sides of the hole, looked around her for any more husks and then hauled herself out of the elevator. She felt a second set of hands touch her legs and knew that Rinn had somehow managed to pull herself together.

_Well done girl, well done..._

Now, having managed to pull herself out of the hole, Helena took a second to get her breath back. Her celebration was short lived however as she heard the terrifyingly familiar moan of a husk to her left. Helena grabbed the pistol from her pants and aimed to the right just in time to see a husk crawl its way through a small space between the wall and the elevator. She wasted no time in shooting it in the head, its body now stuck between the elevator and the wall. She heard the two women shout from below her and quickly turned to the hole again.

"I'm fine!" she yelled. "Come on! Who's next?"

Rinn stepped into view and Helena, looking around her to make sure that there were no other husks, held down her hand. Ramsey hauled Rinn up in the same fashion as she had Helena. Helena first grabbed her friend's arm, then, as she was brought closer, hauled her up and grabbed her around her shoulder. They all strained together, and finally, Rinn too was free of their metal prison. Her breathing was as ragged as Helena's, but the ginger took a comfort in the fact that they were both still alive.

"Now me!" Ramsey yelled from below, prompting both of them to stick their heads close to the hole again. Both held out their hands and Ramsey quickly tried to jump up, holding up her arms as she did so. Helena and Rinn each managed to grab one and strained, trying to pull the mercenary and her heavy armour up.

They couldn't.

Helena was the first to let go, unable to take the strain. When she did, Rinn was forced to drop the mercenary as well, unable to hold up her weight.

"Shit," her friend cursed. "We can't..."

"Come on, you two!" Ramsey yelled from the elevator. "Pull me up! Come on! They're starting to come through the floor!"

Rinn instinctively held out her hand again, but Helena experienced a sickening pause in her psyche. For a split second, her world slowed down and she just _knew_ that neither she nor Rinn would be able to pull the woman up. Not like this, not in her armour...

"Fuck!" Rinn snapped. "Helena!"

"YOU TWO, PULL ME UP!"

Helena blew out a breath and blinked, dropping her hand down the hole again, but knowing that it would be futile. Rinn saw the look in her eyes, opened her mouth to say something, and then without warning jumped down into the hole again.

"RINN!" Helena yelled. "What the fuck?!"

She heard Ramsey echo her words as her friend landed beside her.

"I'll push you up!" Rinn said. "Give you more height! Then you can reach the edge yourself and pull up. Helena can help you!" Her voice was echoed by the closer-than-comfort snarls of the husks. Helena stuck her head through the gap and saw the strange way the floor seemed to move and how unsteady Rinn and Ramsey looked.

"RINN!" Helena yelled. "Get your ass up here!"

Her friend was mimicking Ramsey's pose of before. "I'll push you up!" She shouted. "Come on! I'll be easier to pull up!"

The mercenary looked at Rinn as if she had gone mad, but didn't waste any more time to concede to Rinn's request. She put her one foot into Rinn's awaiting arms and Helena braced herself to grab the stranger her friend had just risked her life for.

_I'm gonna kill her,_ she thought. _I'm going to fucking kill her..._

Ramsey and Rinn moved together, Rinn gathering her strength and hauling the mercenary up who in turn tried to lift herself as much as possible to make the effort easier. Helena reached down, grabbed Ramsey by her collar and...

Rinn cried out in alarm and suddenly they both toppled down. Helena couldn't see anything in the darkness, but she could hear the husks crying out in triumph. Her friend screamed suddenly, in agony, and then Ramsey was up, hauling Rinn by her shoulders. It was hard to tell but Helena got the impression that Rinn's leg had sank through the floor.

Right to where the husks were.

Ramsey yanked at Rinn, trying to haul her to her feet, but she seemed stuck, her mouth open and screaming. Helena too was screaming, though she had no idea when she had started calling her friend's name. She was hanging half into the hole now as well, reaching out and desperately trying to grab _something_ of the pair.

The mercenary grunted, strained and then, with a terrible cry, tore Rinn free of the hole she had sunk through. Rinn was still screaming, her body bend double as she tried to grab her leg. Ramsey had her pistol out and was firing at the hole and Helena was still screaming, shouting her friend's name.

It was the depths of hell and her friend was trapped in it.

"Get up!" Ramsey yelled. "Get up, you fucking bitch! Get up!" When she had shot everything that moved within the elevator Ramsey bent down and grabbed Rinn's fallen shotgun, tossing it up to Helena. That shut her up and she instinctively lunged for the weapon, snatching it out of the air and then putting it beside her. She was about to move back to the hole when two pale hands touched the sides.

"Help her!" Ramsey yelled from the bottom. "Fucking grab her and pull!"

Helena blinked and grabbed the first thing she could which was a tuft of dark hair. The figure yelled, _Rinn_ yelled, out in pain, quickly making Helena loosen her grip and grab her shirt instead. For the second time in as many minutes, she pulled her friend out of the elevator, her body taunt and once again threatening to bend double with pain.

"Get off the elevator!" Ramsey yelled from the darkness. "Take her! Move, Red!"

Helena moved quickly, struggling up and pulling Rinn along with her. Adrenaline had taken over and her eyes were hardly processing _anything_ as she scrambled up towards a dimly lit ladder. Rinn was choking, stumbling, barely able to put weight on her leg. At the ladder, Helena pushed her ahead of her, forcing her to start climbing, yelling unintelligible words. When Rinn didn't start moving fast enough she pushed her up, forcing her to move up four steps. Then, Helena went back for the shotgun and shoved it underneath her one arm. With the sheer force of her will, she pushed Rinn ahead of her, up the ladder and, when they were about half a level up, she shouted the words which she instinctively knew would seal the woman's fate that had saved them both.

"We're clear!"

There was a pause, long enough for Helena to move herself over Rinn and grab a hold of the ladder's sides, pressing her friend against it. She thought that she heard a whimper perhaps, a human voice breathing its last amidst those who no longer could, and then the elevator exploded, the force of it nearly knocking both her and Rinn off the ladder.

There was a terrible noise, unearthly cries and then the fireball dropped down the shaft to depth where this nightmare had started.


	5. Chapter 4

_AN: The background music for the second __section__ is Two Steps from Hell's Titan Dune._

**Chapter 04**

**Miranda Lawson looked tired. **Katelyn studied her XO seated on her right as EDI rambled off a summary of the mine's activities and wondered how much sleep she had gotten the night before. They had not had their evening meeting and it felt strange because she had no idea what the woman was thinking.

Not that anybody was privileged to Miranda's thoughts. The woman shared them as she chose and Katelyn sometimes struggled _understanding_ how she came to the conclusions that she did. But in that lay a lot of her value. Miranda was different from Kate; _thought_ differently than Kate did. She appreciated the woman's input because Miranda had the ability to bring aspects Katelyn would never have considered into perspective.

Which was why she was so interested to hear what her XO thought of their new passengers.

Katelyn glanced at Mordin and Garrus, but they appeared to be focused on what EDI was saying. It reminded her that AI was still speaking and she brought her focus back to the present.

"In short," EDI was saying. "The mine was a joint venture between different privately owned human companies who used the Blue Suns for protection. Most of their business was legitimate, though I have found some evidence of tax evasion. They mention nothing of the artefact, but their employee turnover has increased tenfold in the past four months."

Miranda shifted, tapping her stylus on her datapad. "Turnover?" She asked. "Have a lot of people been leaving?"

"No, Officer Lawson," EDI answered. "They have not. Yet productivity did not increase in proportion to the growth in labour. The pattern points to a high staff mortality."

Garrus shifted in his seat. "Or indoctrination," he pointed out, glancing at Kate. "Or huskification. Or whatever you want to call it."

Katelyn didn't comment, but she remembered the amount of bodies that lay around the mine. Human and husks alike.

"Do we know what happened?" She asked. "Is there any data about what happened to these employees?"

"Negative, Commander," EDI replied. "The most were assigned to Sector 21. Of that level, there is no data."

Mordin made a sound from his side of the table. "Probably the section where we found the artefact," he remarked. "Very dark. No information. Indoctrication. Reapers did not want the outside world to know."

Katelyn felt a chill touch her, but she shook it off and turned to Miranda.

"Have you been able to speak to either of the two about this?" she queried.

Miranda glanced up from her datapad and shook her head. "Dr Chakwas let me know that Ris was awake briefly, but she was in no state to answer any questions. Understandably, I believe that both women's frames of mind will be... _fragile_ for the next couple of days." The pause had been so brief that Katelyn was sure only she picked upon it. She had a feeling that Miranda had very little experience with empathy and the prospect of dealing with these two might've been a bit daunting as she knew her own limitations in tact.

"Have we managed to acquire any more records on them?" Katelyn asked, motioning to her data file. "I didn't receive anything." She glanced at EDI's avatar who had been responsible for mining the data.

"No," the AI answered immediately. "They were booked into the mine the day before. They weren't supposed to be with the shipment of workers, but no investigation was made of it."

Garrus's mouth shifted. "Slaves probably," he pointed out. "They don't go through the books."

Katelyn nodded then turned to Mordin whom she knew had studied the videos they had intensely. She had only had the heart to watch through it once. It showed nothing of Sector 21. She only had videos detailing the two women's arrival to the mine and then the two of them forcing themselves out of an elevator shaft and scrambling for the next one, Helena already supporting her injured friend. The minutes that followed showed her a lot more of the two women than she would ever think they'd reveal to them.

"Is there anything else the vids could tell you?" she asked and glanced at Miranda. "You?"

Mordin shrugged at the same time as Miranda shook her head. The XO waited for the salarian to speak.

"Will spend more time looking at it, Shepard," the salarian said. "Could not see how Rinn got injured."

Miranda's mouth thinned. "I don't think it's really relevant anymore," she said with a sigh. "What's done is done."

Katelyn didn't like her tone.

"What's the status of the nanocytes in Rinn's body?"

Miranda's features grew blank and she looked as if she was about to present a lecture. "The nanocytes are still present in her body, but it seems that her immune system is trying to dispose of them." She glanced at Mordin. "Do you think her body would be capable of breaking them?"

Mordin's eyes widened as he considered this. "Quite likely," he said. "Evidence will be in excretion. If her body breaks it down, it will release it as well. Must monitor that. Run tests." He smiled. "I'll help." He turned to Shepard. "Finger on its own is harmless. They're not sending out any external signal, but the cells communicating with each other. Interested to see if possible to revert cells back to original human form. Will keep you updated."

Katelyn nodded and turned back to EDI. "Is there really _nothing_ that you turned up on these two?" she queried. "Where they worked last, birth records..."

"No, Shepard," EDI interrupted her. "Without a second name, there is no point of reference. I am in the process of running their pictures against the Alliance population registry, but that search will take an estimated four months to complete. Their omnitools were company issue and had no identification."

"Slaves." Garrus repeated from his side and was silent.

Katelyn felt uncomfortable and wondered what more she could ask. To her surprise though, it was Miranda who spoke up next, watching her curiously.

"Is there anything specific that you want to know about them, Commander?" she queried. "Do you know something?"

Kate raised an eyebrow and mused over the fact that Miranda could probably read her just as well as she could read the Cerberus agent.

"Rinn looks familiar," she confessed. "Vaguely, but... There's something there. I can't tell you specifically what it is, but I've encountered her before."

"And Helena?" Miranda asked to which Katelyn shook her head.

"No," she said. "But again, it's difficult to say. They knew who we were. They haven't asked us a lot of questions. Have you noticed?"

Miranda nodded, but there were no further comments that they could make on the subject. It would have to wait until they could question the two.

"How do you wish us to proceed from here, Commander?" Miranda asked and Kate considered her question for a few moments.

"I want to stay in the area," she said finally. "I want to see if anybody comes back to survey the damage. If they don't and we need to move on, then we do so, but I think the mine is something the Council needs to know of. It might be the Terminus systems, but they do take a very dim view on the abuse of mining rights. So," she glanced at Miranda. "You and Chakwas can take that time to treat our two guests and determine how much of a threat those nanocytes in Rinn's body poses. If it is one. When they wake up again, and they're able, I would like to talk to them."

"Separately or together?" Miranda asked and Katelyn grew quiet for a bit as she thought. "Separately," she said. "That might be best. They're not our prisoners," here she addressed the whole of the table and somewhere in the recess of her mind a memory stirred, of herself lying in an alliance shuttle as they evacuated her from Mindoir. The hairs on the back of her arm stood up, but she kept her pose and spoke quickly. "I don't want us to forget what they've been through. If they are defensive or difficult, please consider that it might be from that trauma." She looked at the last person who was present in the meeting though she did not participate in it. She had simply been sitting in the corner, taking notes but Katelyn knew from experience that those green eyes always saw more than they let on.

"Yeoman Chambers, it might be worth it if you stop by the infirmary as well."

The young red head nodded. "Of course, Commander," she said. "I was going to suggest it."

Shepard nodded at her crew members and stood up, officially ending their session. "EDI, the moment you find anything else about them, let me know immediately. I am... going to my cabin to look at the footage again. In the meantime, everybody carry on with your duties. And thank you for all you've done so far."

* * *

"_**Facility lockdown in T minus ten minutes,"**_** a voice blared through the loudspeakers. **_"All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation. Message repeat, facility lockdown in T minus nine minutes and thirty seconds. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evaluation."_

"Ag, fok off," Helena whispered as she dug her nails into Rinn's arm, watching the elevator numbers as they slowly crept their way to the top. "We heard you the first time."

The young woman with them in the elevator whimpered. "We'll make it, right?" She said. "They won't close the door when we're still here? Will they?" Her cheeks were tear stained and her blue eyes were wide as saucers. Helena had never really liked blondes and this was why.

_Useless genetics. Recessive gene. _

_Don't be an ass, you don't like anybody._

"We will," she said, trying to speak levelly, feeling Rinn's breathing against her own chest and against the arm she had across her back. She had grabbed a hold of her friend's belt and was using that to keep her whole body up. "If we stick together. And you help us." The young woman just looked at them and Helena realised that she was going to have to be _nicer_. "What's your name, love?"

"Peggy," the young girl whimpered as the loudspeaker blared.

"_Facility lockdown in T minus nine minutes. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation."_

"Peggy Daniels, my father is a partner in this corporation you know. They... They won't let me stay down here."

Helen felt Rinn's snort, but her friend said nothing she knew that they were both thinking it. _Your father isn't here._

"No they won't," Helena agreed, still keeping her voice level. "That's why you have to help us, Peggy. That's why you _can_ help us. We just need to get to that door and everything will be alright. We'll move a lot quicker if there are three of us."

The wide eyed girl looked at her and nodded slowly. Happier, Helena continued. "And we have guns," she said. "We can shoot those creatures."

Peggy perked up at the sound of this. "Can I have a gun?"

_No._ Helena sniffed and rather asked. "Have you ever shot a gun before?"

The young woman hesitated then shook her head. "No. My father didn't want me to."

Helena and Rinn shared a silent look. "Then I don't think it's such a good idea," she said, trying to be patient without alienating the young woman. _She needed her._ "Rinn's gun is out of clips. And, I'm a very good shot. So, it's better if I keep it. You can help me and I'll shoot the monsters. Alright?"

The elevator came to a halt and opened up onto a dim corridor. _"Facility lockdown in T minus eight minutes. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation."_ Peggy looked up from where the sound had been coming and paused.

_Oh no._

Her blue eyes shot to Helena's and she took a step back. "I... I'm sorry," she said. "I... There's... No... Those creatures..."

"Peggy," Helena spoke up quickly, meeting the girl's gaze. "Peggy, remember, I can shoot the monsters. You just have to help us..."

The young woman turned her gaze away. "I don't think they're here yet," she said and bolted, her white lab coat flapping behind like exhaust fumes from a car. Helena stared at her and was instantly nauseous with rage. She started to move forward, for a second imagining shooting the coward in the back, when Rinn pulled away from her and pushed her violently in the direction of the fleeing lab assistant.

"Go," her friend said, speaking for the first time since they entered the elevator. "You can make it."

"_Facility lockdown in T minus seven minutes. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation." _

Helena turned back to her and gave her a bewildered look, the rage replaced by surprise. "Fuck that," she said. "Come on." She moved to Rinn again to seize her, but the young woman moved away, limping to the end of the elevator.

"Helen, you can make it!" She snapped. "You can run fast enough to reach the door! GO!"

_Self sacrifice. Fuck that._

"Don't be a bloody fool," Helena snapped, grabbed Rinn's arm and pulled her out of the elevator before she could protest, almost throwing her to the ground. She did it just in time, because the elevator closed and went back down into the depths of the facility. "Come on!"

Rinn shouted in frustration and pulled away from her. "We both know we won't make it together!" she snapped, pulling herself up to her full height and stared down at Helen with balled, shaking hands. "Stop being such a stubborn bitch and go on!" When Helen took a step in her direction, her friend's arm twitched and she realised suddenly that Rinn was ready to hit her. And being unconscious wasn't going to help their cause. She was vaguely aware of the automated female voice setting down another deadline, but she couldn't hear the count, her whole attention focused on her friend.

She took a step back and crossed her arms, lowering her voice to a calm whisper. "I'm not leaving you," she said simply. "So you can either come with me and we can both try to reach it. Or I'm going to stand here. With you. And wait." She purposefully broke up her last sentences as she leaned against the wall and waited, watching Rinn as she tore herself apart internally.

Above them, the intercom lady barked another announcement.

"_Facility lockdown in T minus six minutes. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation." _

Helena felt her heart tremble with anticipation, but she didn't dare show it nor the fear that she felt suddenly. She wanted to yell at Rinn again to get moving. She needed to move herself, every instinct in her body telling her to grab her friend and go. Yet, she could feel that Rinn had not yet reached that tipping point. The young woman was standing in front of her, trembling, her breathing ragged. Then, the announcement came again.

"_Facility lockdown in T minus five minutes and thirty seconds. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation." _

Something shifted between them and Helen knew that _now_ was the right time.

"So," she said calmly. "Are you going to come with me?"

Rinn closed her eyes, took a deep breath and screamed. "FUCK!" The shout was like a cry, a howl. Before Helena knew what was happening, she felt herself seized as Rinn barrelled forward and started running with her down the corridor. It lasted about three strides before her leg gave way, but Helen was ready for her and quickly grabbed her as before. It was completely inappropriate, but Helen found herself laughing hysterically as she pulled forward, carrying nearly Rinn's entire weight.

Far ahead, she could see the disappearing tail coat of dear _Peggy's_ lab coat as she ran towards the door. _Be open,_ she begged. _Just be open and let us get outside._

"Stupid bitch," Rinn panted in her ear. "Fucking stupid bitch!"

"_Facility lockdown in T minus four minutes. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation." _

"I can't fucking believe you."

Helen laughed and pushed forward even harder, increasing their pace. Rinn was now running full on her injured leg and the only thing keeping her up and balanced was Helen's presence at her side.

"Very few people can!" She shouted. "Now run! I think I can see the door!"

"_Facility lockdown in T minus three minutes and thirty seconds. All available personnel please proceed to the exits. This is a code red evacuation." _

Rinn whimpered. "We're not going to make it." In front of them, the coat suddenly disappeared and a scream reached their ears. And... those snarls.

"Husks!" Helena yelled. "Fuck!" They wouldn't have time to deal with the door and the husks. How they had reached the top, she didn't know. And they were running right towards them. Ahead of them they could now see Peggy being born to the ground, screaming as the creatures tore into her.

Her head turned towards them and she screamed. "Help me! Help me!" Her voice was hysterical and it made every nerve in Helena's ears shiver and the door, that damned door was still too far away. Helen knew in her heart of hearts that they wouldn't have made it even if they had left the elevator at a run. But...

"Cover me!" She yelled at Rinn and let go of her so that she could shove the pistol into her hands at a run. "Shoot them! I'm going to try and keep the door open!" _And run past these husks..._

"_Facility lockdown in T minus three minutes. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation." _

Rinn fumbled, would've muttered a protest, but Helena gave her no chance. Satisfied that she had a hold on the weapon, Helena broke away from her and bolted straight at the husks. She didn't know how fast they could move, but she hoped that she was faster. And that Rinn's aim would be true when it needed to be.

There were only about five husks and three of them were occupied with dear Peggy Daniels, whose father was a partner in the company. But two noticed Helen's approach and decided to meet her half way. They were almost on top of her when the first one fell and in hind sight, Helen could've _sworn_ she felt the bullet pass right by her ear. It stumbled into its companion and the distraction was all that she needed to jump past them and run for the door. It was... So close.

"_Facility lockdown in T minus two minutes and thirty seconds. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation." _

Another shot ran out in the corridor and this time Helen heard something drop just behind her. She dared to glance back and saw a husk twitching on the floor behind her. If Rinn had missed that shot, she wouldn't have had to worry about the door...

"Shoot them! Shoot them!" Helena suddenly heard _another_ voice in the corridor and when she looked back, she saw a group of people sprint up behind Rinn who had stopped running and was now leaning against the wall, taking aim on the remaining husks. Judging their speed, Helen knew without a doubt that the group wasn't going to reach the door in time.

With the exception of one man that was racing ahead like a sprinter. Helena slowed down a little, her mind racing. If there were two of them then maybe...

"_Facility lockdown in T minus two minutes. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation." _

She _hated_ that voice.

Then, she saw a flash of red on the ground and knew what they could do. She grabbed the young man as he sprinted past her.

"Help me..." Before she could finish he punched her in the face and carried on running. Helena dropped to the floor and lost a few, very precious seconds. Yet, when she came to her senses, she was already scrambling up, dashing for the red gas canister that she had seen. Two more shots rang out and this time, Helena had the faintest suspicious that Rinn _wasn't_ shooting on the husks.

"Just keep one bullet!" she yelled, not caring. Rinn had lost her target anyway and the young man was seconds away from the door.

"_Facility lockdown in T minus one minute and thirty seconds. Please stand by for blast door containment. All personnel, proceed to the exits immediately. This is a code red evacuation."_

She grabbed the gas canister and yanked at it, tipping it over. It was too heavy for her to carry, but she started rolling it. Its balance was off, and it toppled and threatened to go off course, but then as she build up speed, it started running true and she spend the minimal effort keeping it on track. She didn't dare turn back to see what was happening behind her, didn't dare see whether there were any other people still running. Peggy's screams had gone silent, but not all the husks were.

_I hate that sound. I hate the sound that they make._

"_Facility lockdown in T minus one minute. __S__tand by for blast door containment. Stand clear of closing zone.__All personnel, step away from the exits. This is a code red evacuation." _

_I hate her even more. _

When she was about thirty meters away from the door she let the canister go and watched it roll towards where they were going to close. She turned back and met her friend's gaze.

"Rinn!" She shouted and held out her hands, not even bothering to speak a command, because she _knew_ that her friend had already picked up on what she was going to do. Stephen King called it being part of a Ka-tet. Where a number of people worked so well together that they'd share thoughts without speaking.

Rinn drew her arm back and threw the gun.

"_Facility lockdown in T minus thirty seconds. __S__tand by for blast door containment. Stand clear of closing zone. All personnel, step away from the exits. This is a code red evacuation."_

Helena caught the gun, saw that there was still one husk standing and turned her back on it, looking back towards the door. Around her, that hated announcer had started counting down the seconds.

"_Doors closing in fifteen seconds, thirteen seconds, eleven seconds..." _

The canister had lost speed and was starting to veer off target. _No,_ Helena whispered. _No damn you._ It wobbled and swerved...

"Five, four, three..."

There was an audible mechanical click and when she saw movement from the sides of the walls she took aim upon the gas canister and fired.

And missed.

And fired again just as the door slammed shut.

The gas canister exploded with a bright and very loud bang, blowing her off of her feet. Her ears started whistling as she felt the searing heat brush across her face and her skin. She breathed in with shock, choked and started coughing. And then... Then everything was dark except for the whistling in her hears.

Helena lay on the ground panting, blinking at the white flashes behind her eyes. She turned onto her stomach and pushed herself up, though her arms gave way once and she almost fell face first into the floor. She coughed, braced herself, and pushed up again and this time strong hands grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her up. She knew who it was without looking and when the emergency lighting flickered into existence she could see the desperation in Rinn's eyes. They were white with fear and dismay, telling Helena exactly what she needed to know.

The doors were closed.

They turned towards them and Helena pulled away from Rinn to try and see whether her attempt at destroying them as they closed had failed.

_Too ambitious,_ she thought as she felt the heat from the metal around her and saw the charred, sparking pieces of wires that stuck out everywhere. The door was closed and it appeared as if the only thing that was damaged was the panel which controlled the locking mechanism.

_Not that we'd be able to hack it,_ Helena thought numbly as she touched its destroyed surface, not caring that it burned her fingers. The fire had been quick, hot and out in a matter of seconds. _They said so. When this started. That when the door closed... That was it._

She sank down against the door and rested her forehead against the heated metal, banging her fist against it once.

_Damn it,_ she thought as tears burned behind her eyes and she exhaled. _Damn it all._ She sat down on her hunches and took off her glasses so that she could wipe her face, then, still with her head leaning against the wall, she covered her eyes because she knew that she wouldn't be able to stop herself from crying. Now that things were slowing down, now that she had _failed_, she felt the burning sensation of her over-exerted muscles. She felt the tight sensation in her chest from her asthma.

And she felt the steady throb on her cheek where that man had hit her. Helen had to close her eyes tightly as she stifled a sob. _Stars you fucking loser,_ she thought. _Stop crying. Stop it!_ A hand touched her shoulder and she shuddered from the unexpected touch.

* * *

**Even drugged, Helena shuddered when she touched her.** Miranda hesitated, curling her fingers back, then carefully rested them on Helena's back again, pulling her braid out of the way. Anita had done it before Miranda had started operating on her and it had made Helen look more civilised. Not that her attitude had changed. EDI had told her how resistant the woman had been when Chakwas tried to talk to her.

Miranda didn't like it.

She also didn't like the fact that Katelyn had said she recognized the other. Miranda glanced back to where Rinn was. She was also sleeping for the moment. Chakwas had taken a break, urged to go by Miranda herself. There was very little point in both of them working themselves to the bone.

_We have to find out where you come from,_ she found herself thinking and felt that the thought was very important. There had to be some significance, some _reason_ why Kate found the dark-haired woman familiar.

_You of all people. _

The phrase had stuck with Miranda, giving her reason not to trust either of them. Yet she did feel sorry for them. She had seen the footage of the mine; seen how hard they had fought to stay alive. How much they had fought each other in those precious few minutes before the mine locked down.

_Would I have stayed as you did?_ She thought as she turned back to Helena and began to peel away the dressing that she had used to cover the graphs. _Katelyn would've._

She sighed as the woman shuddered again and briefly allowed her hand to move to her shoulder, squeezing and hoping on some level it would ease the woman's mind.

* * *

**Helena, embarrassed by her lack of self-control, made sure to quickly take Rinn's hand****,**** even ****though**** she had pulled away from it in the beginning.** She held onto it for a second then let go. She took a deep breath and, aware of the heat on her knees and hands for the first time, pushed herself up and wiped her face, relieved that the darkness would hide her tears. She didn't look at Rinn immediately, but turned back to the corridor from where they had come. The group of people who had also come too late were looking at her and the door in dismay and horror. Helena bit her lip and turned back to Rinn. Looking into her friend's green gaze, she tried to muster a smile.

"Well," she said, still aware of the whistling in her ears. "That failed." She shook her head, trying to clear it of the whistling sound. Beside her, Rinn was visibly trembling. Her gaze was dark as she stared at Helena in what could only be incomprehension. The ginger took a moment to weight her mood and, from lack of anything better to say, she smiled at her.

"Look on the bright side," she said. "Now Shepard can rescue us." Excitement brushed past the shock of her failure. Shepard _would_ come for them. That's how these things worked. It was in the _rules_. And she suspected that she had played this mission — the one with the artefact that turned people into husks. All they had to do was to avoid it and survive until Shepard decided to scan the planet…

Rinn grabbed her wrist painfully, opening her mouth to speak, no… To _yell_ at her. Helena could see it building in her eyes and then…

"You've destroyed it!" A voice hollered. "You've destroyed the lock! What kind of a stupid bitch are you?"

They both turned around surprised to see one of the people storming towards them. He was a chubby man and, in this world, reminded Helena of a volus. His face was flushed from running as he indicated at the door.

Helen raised an eyebrow and pulled out of Rinn's grip so that she could cross her arms, fixing the man with one of her 'fuck off and die' looks.

"The kind that was trying to keep the door open longer for you," she said. "Once it's closed, it's closed. There's no opening it now."

The fat man and pushed past them and was surveying the damage to the mechanism, moaning as he did so. "No, not now," he said. "Not anymore. Not with the panel destroyed! What the fuck were you thinking?!" He rounded on her and Helena, head shy and still shivering with adrenaline, jumped back and pulled her gun on him.

_You won't hit me damn you…_

She thought that he'd try regardless, but suddenly his eyes widened and he made a gargling sound as Rinn grabbed him around the collar and threw him back, limping in between Helen and him. The anger that Helena had seen in her face was now completely focused on him.

"Don't touch her!" She snapped. "I didn't see _you_ helping when the door was closing, you fat fuck. Nor your friend who just ran past!"

The chubby man pointed a finger at her and looked ready to shout when someone else stepped into the tight circle.

"Hey!" A female voice, older and filled with desperate authority, snapped. "Calvin! It's not her fault! You two…" She turned to Helen and Rinn, her black eyes wide with fear. She wasn't exactly African, more the sort of coffee colour that Helen imagined the world would be like if everybody decided to shag until all the different colours evened out… "You two please relax. Put the gun away, your effort was..." Her voice broke for a second with that same dismay that Helena had seen. "Extraordinary. Thank you for trying."

Trembling, Helena swallowed and lowered the gun. She wanted to sneer at the man, but her whole face was throbbing now. _Trying,_ she thought. _Extraordinary__.__B__ut not enough. Never enough._

She looked away abruptly and stepped away from the group, feeling crowded and awkward as the rest of the people joined them. There were seven in total, two mercenaries, the fat man and the woman, an elderly man who looked ready to have a heart attack, two women either their age or perhaps slightly older and another man who was kneeling besides Peggy's body, checking for a pulse.

Calvin was still angry and panting as he rounded on the woman, his pale cheeks flushed and covered with sweat. "Look at the lock, Esmi!" He hollered. "She broke it! We would've been able to hack it, but…"

"You wouldn't," a merc spoke up and took off his helmet. He had a Hispanic look though his eyes were blue as he looked from person to person. "This system is one of the top of the line. Unhackable when closed in a code red evacuation." He looked at his companion who joined them, also taking off his helmet. He looked more Asian, but had that same shagged coffee colour. "The moment those doors slammed shut, it fried the panel controls. You need the master key to open it." He sneered at Calvin. "And it's not here. It's never kept on site."

His companion ran his hand through his hair and then turned to Helena. "Good effort," he agreed. "Smart to try and keep the door from closing. I'm Cain." He held out his hand to her, which Helena took gingerly. She glanced at Rinn who seemed to have quieted down and now seemed overwhelmed by the amount of people present around them.

"Helena," she said shortly and motioned to her friend. "Rinn." She swallowed and glanced at her gun. "You don't have a spare thermal clip or two for us?" The merc grinned at her, surprising her and took a band from around his arm, handing it to her. By her guess it had about eight clips. Then, he reached around his leg and unwrapped another for Rinn. Hers had about twelve, but by now they had learned that the shotgun pulled more energy and where the pistol could fire off five shots from each clip, it could only do one.

"And we've got plenty more where that came from," he said as Rinn took it carefully. "If you keep shooting, we'll keep supplying." He turned to his friend. "So, what's our plan of action?"

The old man and the two crying women reached them and looked at the group in anticipation. Helen had the strangest sensation that it was all being set up like a story plot: The reluctant heroines thrown into a fight they weren't really prepared for. The veteran mercs who'd be able to shoot their way out of anything and take charge. The cannon fodder — the old man and the two indistinguishable women. The sympathiser and the antagonist. They were all there…

She shivered and shook her head, missing what the other merc said. She turned to Rinn, hoping that she'd clarify, but her friend wasn't looking at her, instead she was studying the group with a sense of trepidation.

"… beacon," The merc, who's name Helena didn't know was saying. "Hopefully one of our companies will pick up on it as they pass through the area. Traffic here's high, so it might take a day at the most. We just have to stay here."

Helena frowned and looked around her. "Here?" she queried. "As in _right_ here?"

The whole group turned to her. "Well sure, Red," the merc said and Helen grimaced at the nickname. Why people always thought to point out her hair colour was beyond her. She knew what colour it was. She had been _born_ with it. "We're not going to our separate sleeping quarters and wait _there._"

Helena sneered at him despite her throbbing face and beside her Rinn shifted, clearly not liking his tone either. "I know that," she said. "But I don't think that it's a good idea to be _right_ here." She looked to Rinn for support, who nodded, but said nothing. "How many people were there in this facility?"

Esmi frowned at her and she could feel Rinn's attention pick up beside her. "What does that have to do with anything?" the older woman asked.

Helena licked her lips and tried to get her words straight, forcing them to make sense to herself before she told them to others. "Well," she said and turned to the mercenaries. "Maybe everything. Do you know how many people they managed to evacuate from the base?"

Cain was frowning at her. "Jean?" He queried, turning to his friend who was frowning, though Helen could see he had an unpleasant thought to share.

"Less than twenty of the shuttles had left when we were last in contact topside," he said. "Hundred, maybe two hundred people. More could've been outside." His face twisted to what Helena could only say was anger and for a moment she felt a sense of kinship with him. They had been screwed as well. "They didn't give us enough time."

"They... They thought, it was enough." The old man spoke up suddenly. "There... Drills. Simulations. Years ago. Showed that the base could be completely evacuated in twenty minutes. Given any circumstances. I remember... participating in those drills."

It was Rinn's time to speak. "They were _wrong_," she said sharply and opened her mouth agai,n but stopped when everybody looked at her. One of the two women who were clinging to each other started crying harder.

"Oh Adam," she whispered. "Oh Adam, I don't think he made it. Carol, I don't think Adam made it." Her friend soothed her and gave Helena a desperate look who sniffed sharply and looked away.

"So, two hundred people," she said. "Out of how many? Five hundred? Six hundred? We were only here a day and I remember that there were a _lot_ of departments listed here. Not all were miners. Not all were assistants." She looked at the two mercs. "And there were a _lot_ of guards." Her anger burned again. "And there were a lot of people who had been brought in _especially_ to be fed to that thing downstairs." Some of them looked at her blankly, not knowing what she was talking about, but Helena ignored them and turned to the other woman.

Esmi grimaced and shook her head. "One thousand three hundred and eighty-seven," she said. "Not counting the new shipment of workers. I had some of the human resources documentation cross my desk occasionally." She grimaced. "It's a big facility."

The numbers were frightening and Helena had to close her eyes for a moment, but realised that she had to respond quickly, while she had everybody's attention.

"So... Over a thousand people still unaccounted for," she said. "Heck, let's be positive. Maybe as little as five hundred. Maybe even four hundred. You never know how many were out here already when you lost contact," she looked at Jean and Cain. "But the fact of the matter is that there is still a hell of a lot of people unaccounted for. There were thirty people who came in with us. I haven't seen one of them and we were _far_ down." She grimaced, remembering those that had been taken into the room with the artefact. Were they still there? Were they still human? "How many people worked on the floor with the artefact? A hundred?"

Beside her, Rinn shuddered suddenly, breathing in sharply with wide eyes. She was beginning to _understand._ "Oh..." She started, then clamped her hand over her mouth. Her eyes were like saucers when dropped her hand and she looked at Helena and, although she couldn't hear it, Helen saw her mouth the word.

_Fuck._

Esmi looked uncomfortable. "About," she said slowly and grew silent, probably contemplating how many had made it.

Helena let out a slow breath and made sure to look at everybody. "So, you have between two and four hundred people that aren't here. That are not coming up those elevators. I... I think the math was _almost_ right with the evacuations. They just didn't account for the quick expansion of the tunnels or the chaos factor." She was beginning to speak faster, using her hands to emphasise her words. "If there is still anybody _alive_ down there, then they'd have been here by now."

This time it was Cain's turn to swear, clearly he had done the math as well.

Calvin hadn't.

"What the fuck are you saying?" he said, wiping at his brow. "What are you getting at, you babbling idiot?"

Rinn rounded on him, clearly still in the mood to beat him to a bloody pulp. "She's saying that there's potentially between two and four hundred of those husks _coming this way_. Do we have to draw you a picture?" She looked around when he stepped away from her, then turned back to Helena. Her face was so pale that Helena thought she was going to faint.

"We have to get out of here. This is too Resident Evil for me."

_Resident evil?_ Helena thought. _More like derelict reaper._ She turned to Jean and saw that he too had gone pale. _Finally__,__ fuck mook._

"We have to make a stand," he said. "Right here. We can barricade the elevator. Blow it. We can stay right here. They won't come up."

"They've been here already." A new voice spoke up and everybody jumped. Helena thought that her heart might stop when she saw the young man who had knelt next to Peggy's body step into the circle as well. She had completely forgotten about him. "What's to stop them?" He sniffed and gave everybody a chillingly calm look. "And make a stand here? There's no food. No water. Nothing. No medigel. Nothing with which to make shelter. Our probability of surviving here is... nothing."

"And who the fuck are you?" Jean said in friendly greeting. The young man looked at him and frowned.

"Does it matter?" he said. "I'm just another face. But _she's_ right." He pointed at Helena. "Chances are most of our fellow colleagues have been turned into those things. And you're right, a lot of people have been moved to Section 21." He grimaced and called up the omnitool. "I never bothered asking why but... Now we know. I wonder if it senses that we are still alive?"

"Sensing?!" Calvin snapped. "It's a fucking glowing tooth. It can't sense. It can't think and it can't do math."

Helena shivered as she heard a voice in her head. _But even dead gods can dream..._

"We _really_ have to get out of this corridor," Rinn said beside her, her voice tight. "Really. People. Really." She had taken her shotgun from her back and was reloading it, her eyes darting from one side to the other.

Esmi looked at her bewildered. "Where do you suggest we go?" she asked in dismay. "We can't go deeper. There... will be more of them!"

"We _can_ make a stand here," Jean interjected, but his friend was having none of it.

"Against _four hundred_ of those things?" Cain queried. "We had trouble taking down ten! We'll be trapped, Jean!"

The crying woman was now sobbing loudly and Helena felt like strangling her. Her friend Carol looked mildly better, but the bitter hope in her eyes was terrible to see.

"But your people are coming?" she queried. "They'll be here soon…"

Cain shook his head. "No way of telling when," he said. "Our communications are down. They can be out there right now or they might _never_ come!"

Jean rounded on Cain without warning, seizing him by his chest plate. "You can't say…"

There was a terrible moaning from the darkness beyond their emergency lightening. Helena understood for the first time what it meant to have one's bowels turn to water and it took all the self-control that she had not to lose control of her bodily functions. The terrible smell and sound from Calvin's direction told her that he had not had her reservation.

"Oh… Fuck." Rinn muttered and raised her gun…

* * *

**"The alarms went off," Rinn was saying, only glancing up occasionally.** "There was this recorded message announcing that the facility was going to lock down. We tried to get to the exit on time but..." Rinn gave a shrug. They wouldn't have been having this conversation had the two women succeeded.

Commander Katelyn Shepard watched her, studying her features and her nervous body language. She had said to Dr Chakwas that she was cold and the doctor had given her the black robe to wear underneath the blankets. Despite that, Rinn still had the blankets pulled up as high as they could go and Katelyn got the distinct impression that the infirmary temperature had nothing to do with it.

"How deep were you at the time the alarm went off?" Katelyn asked

"I..." Green eyes met hers then flitted back down. "I'm not sure. We were... We had to use two elevators. The one didn't go all the way up..." She fidgeted, but didn't say anything immediately, lost in her thoughts. Then she shook her head. "We were pretty far down."

Katelyn pulled a chair closer and sat by the foot of the bed — trying to ease Rinn's discomfort by not towering over her. It was clear the woman was struggling, though whether it was with the memories, being questioned or simply the hindrance her own mouth provided, the commander didn't know.

"I'm... I'm sorry, Commander. I-" Rinn opened and closed her mouth forming words silently, seeming to try and organised them in her mind. "It's all just a little overwhelming. Everything is. I'm... It's all so... Different. Everything has been so different."

"Different from the mine?" Katelyn queried.

Rinn shook her head and frowned. "The mine was also... different. Eerie even before... Even as we went down."

"Why were you down that deep? Where were you going?"

"We were taken down to get our assignments." Dark strands of hair fell forward as the woman looked down at her hands, rubbing at the fabric

"What were you assigned to do?" the commander pressed gently.

The hands stopped and Rinn sat motionless. The silence flooded the entire infirmary and Katelyn glanced around quickly. Miranda was moving behind the screen that had been set up, working on Helena's back again and no doubt listening to _every_ word that Rinn had been saying. Even Chakwas had stopped pretending to work and was just listening, waiting for the woman's answer.

"To die," Ris breathed.

She clenched her fists gingerly and seemed to study the bruising on her knuckles. "We were supposed to go into this room where there was this old..." Rinn seemed to struggle for a word, her mouth working. "Artifact," she said finally. "And they were going to close the door behind us and..." She shook her head, agitated suddenly. "The husks came from there. They escaped or got released or something. Helen and I and... We ran. Got to the elevator. Only it didn't... And we had to... But they..."

Katelyn lay her hand on the woman's ankle, squeezing it softly, grounding Rinn. She watched her look down, take a deep breath then look back up.

"I'm sorry," Rinn whispered. "We-"

"Rinn, it's okay," Katelyn interrupted gently, glancing at Chakwas who awarded her with a meaningful look. _Don't upset my patient._ "You need to rest."

But Rinn shook her head. "We made it to the top," she pushed on. "We ran... Well, as much as we could. My leg... I hurt it in the elevator shaft. In the first one, I mean."

Katelyn let her thumb draw circles on Rinn's ankle. Helena had used touch to assure her friend on the shuttle and now the commander tried to apply the same strategy. By the way the woman's words were calmer and more controlled, it seemed to be working.

"We managed to get to the second one though... Husks were already on the higher levels before we got there," Rinn swallowed. "But we got to the other elevator, to the entrance level, to the main door... We didn't make it in time."

Rinn took a couple of deep breaths and exhaled slowly.

"We weren't the only ones who didn't make it," Rinn said finally and Katelyn removed her hand, sure now that the the moment of panic was over. "We were eight by that door. No, nine. We were nine there. Locked out. Locked in," she corrected again. "There was talk of making a stand there of barricading the elevator and staying there in that corridor until help arrived," she scoffed."Husks won't stop by a door. They'll find a way, even if they have to dig up at you." She shivered, her hand unconsciously moving on her injured thigh.

"We were still arguing. Still trying to figure out what was going on. What we were facing. How many. What our chances were to-." Rinn shook her head. "Stupid. Their moans told us they were coming and in the seconds we had, there was no time to hand out guns. There was no time for anything, but to point and shoot. Only four of us were armed... We were lucky there were only like twenty of them," she gave a bark of mirthless laughter at her words. "Lucky," she mused. "Maybe for that moment we were. If there were more of them, maybe it wouldn't have ended with only one of the others being dead... But... I never really thought luck meant there still being a body count."

Katelyn felt the statement echo in her mind, bouncing off memories of her ragtag squad of defenders during the Blitz; of the Alliance' fleet's sacrifice in the fight against Sovereign; of losing Kaidan. _Ashley has never forgiven me for that one. _

She pulled her attention back to Rinn who hadn't looked up, her fingers having found the edge of her blanket, she seemed to focused on the feel of the fabric.

"Rinn?" the commander murmured her name and the woman glanced up briefly, before looking down again.

"I never really considered myself lucky," she rambled softly. "I just... I'm always the one throwing ones when I should be throwing fives and sixes. Always ones, not even twos. I... I always joke that I don't believe in luck, because I never have any."

"Not a poker player then," Katelyn quipped.

Rinn's mouth twitched into a grin. Seeming genuinely amused, she shook her head. "No. Definitely not." Then, for the first time since their conversation began, the younger woman looked up and held her gaze steady on Katelyn. The commander held still, watching Rinn studying her, seeming to inspect and take in what she hadn't had the opportunity to do before.

Katelyn felt that sense of familiarity stir in her again and she ran through the databank of faces housed within her mind. Rinn wasn't in there, but she had to be. The draw was too strong for her to be imagining it.

Once the examination was done, Rinn shifted and instantly winced. Katelyn's brows wrinkled as she watched the woman's hand trail down to the wounded thigh. _She needs rest._

"I've been keeping you up too long. The good doctor no doubt would have wanted to chase me out sooner."

Rinn grinned as Karin looked up at them and gave the commander an amused, but confirming look. Kate's mouth twitched as she winked at the older woman, then turned her eyes back to Rinn.

She returned her hand to the woman's ankle and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "We'll take care of you and Helena. You just focus on getting rest."

"Thank you, Commander," the dark-haired woman gave Katelyn a solemn nod.

The ginger stood and, noting the younger woman's gesture, quirked her head slightly. It too had been so maddeningly _familiar_.

"Rinn," the commander hesitated by the foot of the bed. "I want to ask you one more thing."

Rinn looked up expectantly, saying nothing and trying to keep her face neutral. Katelyn's eyes bore into hers suddenly and the younger woman swallowed.

"Do we know each other?" she asked the question that had been eating at her from the very first time she set eyes on the woman in the storeroom.

Rinn blinked up at Katelyn and her mouth worked, seeming to try and find a suitable answer. "I- Of course I know you, Commander," she answered carefully. "Everybody does."

Katelyn's face fell and she shook her head. "No, I mean, have we," she gestured to the both of them. "Met before? You seem familiar."

Again the woman paused, her eyes glancing over to Helena as if seeming to want the answer from her. _If we have met, why try and keep it a secret?_ "Not in person, no," she hedged, looking back at Katelyn. She gave a small shrug. "Maybe I have on of those faces?" she suggested. She snorted and shook her head. "I don't really have one of those faces, do I?"

"No, you don't," Shepard agreed and couldn't bite back on the annoyance she felt. _I know I know you. _

"Lena and I... We've seen you," Rinn expanded, again with some care. "We watched you on television- " Katelyn's brow wrinkled. Television was yet another word in Rinn's vocabulary she didn't understand.

Rinn seemed to notice her response and amended quickly. "On vids a lot. We were- we are..." Here she paused, again seeming to look for a word. "Enthusiasts," she said finally and then blushed and rubbed her face. "I mean... It's been..." her mouth worked as she tried to calculate, "It's been... What? Forty years since all of this? Since discovering the relays. There's so much we have to learn and... With everything that's happened recently... With you..." she trailed off. _With me dying. _"We tried to keep track of it... As best we could. It's not always easy," she hedged. "But... we tried and yeah..."

Katelyn nodded, but wasn't satisfied and Rinn read it. "I don't know how it is that you find familiar about me, Commander. Maybe I just remind you of someone?"

Shepard's mouth thinned and crossed her arms. Rinn instantly kept herself still, motionless.

_She reacts to every non-verbal response I give without hesitation, and yet she claims not to know me._

"You're definitely not a poker player," Shepard murmured stonily.

The two stared at each other, unmoving. Then the curtain snapped open behind the commander suddenly and both women jumped at the sound. Instantly, Rinn's hand shot to her leg and she hissed. Miranda paused, a look of regret briefly appeared, then she schooled her features to calm detachment.

"I'm finished," she declared simply, her eyes turned to Chakwas as if it were her that she was informing.

"How is she?" Rinn asked, her breathing still a little shallow, but she kept her focus on Miranda.

"Sedated," the XO replied. "And I'm going to keep her that way for the rest of the day. There's not a lot more to be done at the moment. The first layer of grafts seems to have set, but their speed of conversion isn't to my liking. I think it has to do with the cortisone she was on. The structure is archaic — it is surprising that it's still available. Do you have _any _idea of how much she was taking a day?"

"A couple?" she suggested frowning. "I don't know. She has asthma."

"I picked that up." The woman turned her attention back to Chakwas. "Doctor, may I ask you to accompany me for a moment? I'd like to discuss the next course of treatment."

"Of course Miranda," the doctor said after barely a pause and pushed herself up from the desk. "I'll be back momentarily. Anita, could you please keep an eye on both patients? Thank you."

The two women left the room so quickly that Katelyn was left staring at them in surprise. She frowned at Miranda's retreating form, then hesitated. Except for the geth, she and Rinn were alone. The nurse, Anita, was busy on the other side of the room.

Which was about as much privacy as the Normandy normally allowed you.

_Thank you, Miranda,_ Katelyn thought, now understanding the interruption.

She turned back to Rinn, still thinking about their last conversation. She frowned and sat forward, taking note how the young woman immediately pushed back into her bed. Yet, she never looked away from Shepard, keeping their eye contact. Before Kate could speak though, Rinn spoke up.

"I can't give you a different answer," she said quickly and there was a cold edge to her voice. "And you've already seemed to have decided I'm lying." Katelyn raised an eyebrow at her. "I'm not persuasive," she forged on. "I've never been able to pull that off. I'm not good with words. Helena is better at talking." She stopped herself mid-ramble and shook her head. "I am who I am, Commander. Take it or leave it."

Amused that Rinn was so quick to take the subject up again, proving to Kate that it had lingered in her mind as well, she dared to smile at the young woman.

"This isn't about who you are, Rinn," Katelyn said to her, losing the edge to her voice. "I'm simply trying to find out where you come from."

Rinn looked down at her hands, which were clasping the blankets so hard, the whites of her knuckles were visible through the bruises. She loosened her hold and Katelyn noticed how the woman's hands trembled as Rinn hugged her sides, hiding them from view.

She looked back up at Katelyn and her green eyes glinted despite her neutral tone. "I come from a mine," Rinn answered quietly. "A mine where people died because of me; where my friend almost died because of me. A mine where I had to kill men. Where I had to fight monsters with everything at my disposal and even with my bare hands. I have nowhere I come from besides there. I have no one — family, friends, people — you can connect me to besides Lena." She shook her head. "Are we done? I don't know what more you want me to say. What would satisfy you."

Katelyn was quiet for a few moments and this time, her heart started aching as she looked at the young woman, feeling her anger, sensing her pain. An idea formed in her mind. Impossible, but there.

"Was it Mindoir?" The question was barely audible, hardly more than a breath. Katelyn's head had dipped, her hand playing with the edge of the bed. "Were you there? Or... Was it in Elysium that I failed you? Did I...? So much went wrong there." _So much..._

"No," Rinn answered immediately, surprised then gentle. "No, Commander, you never failed me." Her hand unconsciously slipped out of its hiding place, resting by her leg, seeming to want to reach out despite the distance. "Maybe... I remind you of someone you saw there? Someone you feel you have?"

"Maybe," Katelyn said shaking her head. "Maybe." _But... _

She took a breath and gave a brief smile. "You should get some rest, Rinn. I'll ask Chakwas whether you're allowed to eat, get our cook to make you something."

The way Rinn's eyes widened at the mention of food made Katelyn chuckle. "Thank you," the woman said sheepishly, then sombered. "Really. Thank you... for saving us and... for everything."

_You're not saved yet,_ Kate thought as she gave Rinn a tight, painful smile. "Get some rest."

She turned and left the infirmary and was almost past Chakwas's station when Rinn shifted. "Commander," the woman called and then. "Katelyn?" The name sounded strange on her lips.

The ginger stopped and looked back

"For..." she dipped her head, seeming to gathering her courage, then looked up, making sure that her eyes found Katelyn's. "For what it's worth, Commander. I don't think you failed them. Any of them."

They looked at each other for a long time and, for the time being, Katelyn found herself _accepting_ that there were some questions she could not answer. That there were some faces that she would never forget and others that she will. And perhaps be reminded of them again, in the face of a stranger that she had rescued from certain death.

She nodded at Rinn and left the room.


	6. Chapter 5

_AN: A reminder – Updates are done every Monday. Also, it should be said that this story contains spoilers for ME2 as well as ME3 eventually. Although quite a few years have passed since ME2__ (and almost two years since ME3)__, there are always new people discovering the fandom. So, beware – spoilers ahead._

_Also, as previously mentioned, NaNoWriMo is starting up again soon. During the month of November, there may be some delays in posting as a result. But don't worry, the story will continue. And in December we'll be back to the normal schedule._

**Chapter 05**

**There was more of a commotion around the infirmary than usual. **Samara, who had been in the process of going back to her room from the commissary, paused and looked at the bustle. Like everybody on the Normandy, she was aware of the two new passengers. A part of her was curious as to what had transpired in the mine. The details of the mission hadn't quite spread to the rest of the crew yet and so Samara could only wait or find the right opportunity to ask.

She would not have minded to go down to Aequitas with the Commander, but she wasn't sure that Katelyn Shepard had considered taking her. It was the strangest sensation. She could feel that the Commander wasn't _daunted_ by her. But she was certainly cautious. Respectful. Observant, but unencroaching.

"So, what do you think?" Miranda Lawson was saying to Dr Karin Chakwas in a hushed tone. Samara could tell that they both were troubled, having just left the infirmary.

Karin sighed and gave the Cerberus woman a questioning look. "It's difficult to say," she said softly. "They've obviously been through a lot. Her story certainly backs up what we saw in the footage. And she doesn't strike me as a liar."

Miranda made a considering sound. "She lied about not knowing Katelyn or she spoke around it. Did you notice?"

Samara slowly willed herself to start walking; to move into the two women's line of sight. She felt that it was rude to listen to their conversation without their knowledge.

"I did," Dr Chakwas said and sounded tired. "We'll have to wait and see how it develops. Hallo, Samara."

The doctor had seen her first and had a smile ready. Samara returned it without hesitation. She liked the woman who had gone through so much to ensure that she was settled in the Starboard Observation room. Chakwas still spent some time there with her every now and again.

"Dr Chakwas," she said with a nod. "Officer Lawson."

The latter shifted uncomfortably. "Miranda," she corrected. "Please, Samara." The justicar gave her a slight nod in acceptance, then watched as the XO turned back to Chakwas. "If they are dangerous, I do not want them on this ship."

Karin didn't look at Miranda, but was watching Samara, as if she was expecting her to act or say something. It was too early for Samara to express any opinion and so was content to wait and observe their reactions. Through them, she would learn something of the situation at least.

"Well, what's your prognosis for Helena?" the doctor queried, turning back to the XO. "How long will she require medical treatment?"

Miranda snorted and rubbed her neck. "Months," she confessed and grimaced. "I'll take her out tomorrow. The grafts are settling. I'll need about a week to see how they're growing before I do a second construction. But it doesn't have to be done on the Normandy. I can contact a few of my colleagues and hear if they can continue the work."

Samara could tell immediately that Dr Chakwas did not like the idea. "You mean leave them at a Cerberus facility?" she asked. "And Rinn as well, with that leg of hers?"

Miranda straightened, her lips pressed together. Defiant. "They will receive the best of care."

There was a pause, a moment of tension, before Karin shifted and shrugged. "Katelyn won't like it," she said simply. "Anyway, I think it's more important at this stage that we monitor Rinn to see what happens. If she's clear, we can consider our options."

"How is she a thr-?" Samara began to ask when the infirmary door opened. All three turned to see Katelyn Shepard step through the doorway, her eyes downcast and her features lost in thought. By human standards, it was said that Katelyn wasn't a beautiful woman. Her face was stronger than many would have desired. Her jaw squarer, her nose not quite straight, her eyes not as deep-set, her cheekbones prominent enough to give her face a bit more of a square-shaped appearance. A gentle dusting of freckles helped soften the seemingly hard edges of her appearance. But all of these things, taken together, somehow drew one to her. Her generous mouth could produce a smile easier than a scowl and her face was framed with dark-copper hair that was breathtaking in sunlight. Beneath strong eyebrows, lay intelligent green eyes that captured people the moment they locked on to them.

To Samara, the Commander was striking.

She had seen pictures of Katelyn before the Battle of the Citadel. Her face had worn no scars, but the photos after her battle with Sovereign had shown her supporting a relatively deep cut down her cheek. There was no trace of it now, but from what Samara understood, the interruption in Miranda's reconstruction had left the faint brush of scars down her jaw line. Samara wondered why Katelyn hadn't allowed the Cerberus officer to mend it yet.

"Commander," Chakwas said and Kate turned a brief, almost dazed look on her. Samara watched the doctor pause, giving Katelyn time to recover. "What kind of time frame are we looking at?"

The woman blinked at her and looked confused. Samara frowned at the sight. The display of emotions written over her features was unusual. _Shock? Hurt?_

"I'm not following, Karin," Katelyn said bluntly and glanced at Miranda for clarification. _Strange relationship between the two of them as well..._

Miranda shifted and rubbed her brow. "We were wondering if we should contact one of our facilities to continue their treatment," she said. "Or whether they will be with us for the duration?" It appeared that the XO too could see that Katelyn was having trouble processing and said directly, "How much of our medical resources are we allowed to allocate to them?"

The Commander blinked at both of them and for a moment Samara was almost sure she saw _anger_ in her eyes. But it vanished as soon as she noticed it and Kate fixed them with an unreadable expression.

"Take as much as you need," she answered firmly. "Time and resources. We're not abandoning them again. We can take the time to put two broken people back together." Her last words were almost sharp. "If you'll excuse me, I have work that I need to do." She brushed past them and even walked past Samara though she didn't storm far. She turned around abruptly and looked at the Justicar.

"Samara," she said and hesitated. "Do you need something?"

The Justicar shook her head but frowned at Kate, trying to see what lay behind her eyes.

"I am well, Commander," Samara said slowly. "And you? Are you in need of some assistance..." She hesitated. "With your work?"

They continued to stare at each other until Katelyn broke eye contact. "No. Thank you," she answered and Samara could hear her sincerity. "I have to go. We'll talk later." She turned and left leaving the three of them standing in the corridor, looking at each other perplexed.

Samara couldn't help but notice that both Karin and Miranda looked relieved with Shepard's answer. _Better than having to be the ones to choose where to leave them._ She wanted to meet these women who were causing such a stir, but it didn't seem to be the right time. Miranda and Karin looked at her and there was touch of awkwardness there, as if they didn't quite know what to do with her. Then, Karin inclined her head slightly and went back into the infirmary to her patients. After a few seconds, Miranda did the same and Samara wondered whether she should follow Katelyn Shepard to find out what truly bothered her...

As she stepped towards the elevator, Yeoman Kelly Chambers, a charming young human with a surprising zeal for life stepped out. Her face lit up as she saw Samara and she came to her immediately, holding out a datapad.

"Justicar," she said with a tone of reverence. "I was just coming to look for you."

Samara smiled at her and inclined her head, thinking that people truly learned to appreciate a genuine smile when you travelled on your own. "Yeoman," she said. "How may I assist?" She took the datapad and scanned it.

"Someone was looking for you," Kelly said while the asari read. "She said that you must call her back as soon as you can."

Frowning, Samara glanced at the name and felt a touch of trepidation – Shepard's plight forgotten.

* * *

**Both the women were asleep when Kelly came into the infirmary****,**** but she took the moment to have her first good look.** There were some theories as to their origins circling around the Normandy and the most popular of them were that they were either slaves or ex-mercenaries. The latter had been Joker's suggestion. He had seen a lot of the security footage, probably through EDI and had discussed it with some of the crew. Kelly had no idea why he would've wanted to see it. The women's fear and desperation were heart-wrenching. She had made notes for herself as she studied their reactions and realised that she was essentially dealing with two very different people who were going to go through their trauma in very different ways.

Not only were they both going to carry survivor's guilt, but was Rinn was undoubtedly going to feel some manner of guilt over being the _reason_ her friend had been suck in the hell hole with her. For Helena, Kelly got the impression that the thing that would be eating her the most was her sense of _failure_.

She had told Shepard that they were going to have to watch the ginger as she was clearly the one in charge of the two. Kelly was studying her now as she looked through the glass of the isolation bed. Helena had uneven tan lines, suggesting some outdoor work before she started at the mine and was, for the moment, sedated. Yet, Kelly could see that there was evidence that she had been crying and that struck her as terrible. How alienating must it be to be distressed in a box like this? She glanced towards Chakwas's medical station where she and Miranda were bending over some data figures.

Kelly, unable to help herself, took a brief moment to appreciate Miranda's body, something she very rarely had time to do. There was nothing sexual about it and she certainly didn't want to _sleep_ with the Normandy's XO. But, there was something in a perfectly shaped figure. And even if Miranda secretly hated it, she knew that everybody else didn't.

"How long will she be in here?" She looked down to the sleeping figure again as she asked her question and heard the two women's soft murmuring cease. There was an awkward silence and she could feel the sharpness in Miranda's gaze as she regarded her.

"For the night," the XO answered simply.

Kelly nodded, choosing not to say anything immediately. Instead, she tapped the glass lightly with her fingers, her eyes picking out the dark bruise that had formed on Helena's cheek. In her mind, she saw an image of the young woman grabbing another worker asking for help just to be struck down by him. Helena had stood up almost immediately, but she had lost time they so dearly needed.

_What would've happened,_ Kelly thought as she patted the glass thoughtfully and looked towards Rinn, _if he had helped you? Would you have succeeded? Will you blame yourself or him for those seconds that you lost there?_

"And, how is she doing?" the yeoman asked as she went to Rinn's bedside. "Are there any new developments with her… condition?"

Again the two women looked at her and she could feel the intensity of their gazes. There was something very… similar in their eyes and Kelly found it interesting that Miranda was able to work so well with Chakwas in this. They had never gotten on very well, but ever since Illium, something had shifted in Miranda. Kelly knew that she should've reported this change in the woman to the Illusive Man. However, she could not make herself find fault with the XO getting on better with Shepard's loyal crew. It would only serve to endear Cerberus to the Commander more.

"Nothing yet," Dr Chakwas replied and smiled as a thought apparently came to her. "Kelly, would you be able to stay in the infirmary for a bit? Keep an eye on both of them? Miranda and I need to go see Mordin."

Kelly nodded and hesitated, considering. "If you two need to rest, I can sit and work here," she suggested. "I'll call you the moment something happens."

Miranda paused, but Chakwas briefly took her hand to stop any objections _and it worked._ "That would be kind of you, Kelly," she said and looked at Miranda. "We've been pulling double shifts. Legion is here so he'll help keep an eye on you."

Kelly nodded and went to Rinn's bed, studying the other young woman. She was sleeping, though Kelly could tell immediately that it wasn't the drugged sedation that held Helena captive. Her features were tenser than her friend's and she had fallen asleep with her arms clutched over her chest, the blankets tightly wrapped around her. She was taller than Helena, but didn't bear the signs of physical labour that Helen had – which was interesting. Kelly found herself terribly curious as to what they had done before they worked at the mine.

She pulled a chair closer and sat down, glancing at Miranda and Dr Chakwas to see whether it will be alright. It was Chakwas who smiled at her and she found herself smiling back; realising once again that she really _liked_ working with Shepard and her crew.

* * *

**Shepard watched the group of workers get herded into a lift.** It was the last video coverage of Helena and Rinn before the mine got overrun. No recording equipment had been permitted on the lower restricted levels and the footage that they had managed to recover didn't span over all of the rest of the facility. Data had been lost with the damage of equipment – which no doubt had been caused during the chaos that had followed.

Katelyn felt unsettled even though it was her second viewing. The workers had been assigned numbers and, from records, it was clear that whatever work these people were assigned, never were their names used again.

_Dehumanised. Nothing more than cattle._

It struck the commander as strange that the occupants of the facility were all human and not connected to a particular organisation. Were they funded by Cerberus? The lack of racial diversity would have made sense then. Even the Blue Suns mercenaries were all human.

She had EDI check some of the records of the others that had made up the group heading into the lift cart. Some of them had cursory descriptions of previous experience useful to a mining facility such as the place had started as; and some that were useful to a research facility such as it had become. There were quite a few, like the two women, who weren't allocated as having a specialist skill. To these the classification of DC was given. What that meant though was unknown.

It would be just over an hour later when the lift door would open again with Helena stumbling out. There was no lift car and the red haired woman had leaned back through the entrance to help pull a wounded Rinn out of the shaft. The lockdown warning had already sounded and, by the time both women were moving away from the lift, there were only fifteen minutes left.

"Shepard," EDI piped up suddenly. "Garrus would like to see you."

Katelyn paused the vid and got up when her door slid open. The turian had been aloof after having dealt with Sidonis, seeming to need some space to process. As there weren't any matters that needed attending to regarding the ship's battery the meeting was somewhat unexpected.

Her friend made his way to the steps, his height amplified as she stared up at him. "Shepard, I hope I didn't disturb you." He glanced at the projection coming off the fish tank. "Found anything useful?"

"Nothing yet," Katelyn shrugged. "The main research was conducted on the lower levels..."

"... and they didn't want anyone to see what they're up to," Garrus finished, his mandibles twitching.

Katelyn nodded, then gestured for the turian to take a seat, resuming her own. "We know enough to piece a few things together. EDI is running a check on researchers. Very few left the restricted areas once they entered it. The lack of traffic back up to the surface is... disturbing."

"Hm, what about these two?" Garrus asked nodding to the projection of Helena and Rinn. The turian hadn't sat back once he was off his feet. Instead he leaned forward on his knees, hardly turning his head while he glanced between Shepard and the screen. _So tense. I wonder what's up._ "Figured out why the one looks so familiar?"

"No," she shook her head. "The more I look at Rinn though, the more I feel like I know her; that I should know her. I asked her for some clarification, but she avoided the subject."

"It'll come to you. Maybe she just reminds you of someone."

_No, it's _not_ that._

"Maybe," she hedged giving the projection a look before changing gears. "You doing alright? Was there something you wanted?"

"Hm?" Garrus blinked at her blankly. "Oh, yes. I..." he clasped his hands together, interlocking his fingers. "I just wanted to thank you for your help. Y'know, with Sidonis. Tracking that bastard down would've been a damn lot harder without your help."

"You still happy with how it panned out?"

The turian nodded. "It was the right call, Shepard. Had to be done. Doesn't change what happened, but..." Garrus shrugged. "You know."

"Yeah, I do," Katelyn said softly.

"Anyway, figured it was time I stopped brooding on the whole thing and come say thanks. Seeing these two reminded me that... Life can change very quickly. And you want the right people beside you when it does." Garrus stood and extended his hand. Katelyn followed suit, grasping his. The turian's three fingers clenched her hand briefly before he released it, drawing back. With a final nod, her friend turned and made his way back out of the room.

Katelyn watched him leave, then returned her gaze to the projection of the two women paused in mid-stride. Determination and desperation etched on their faces as they ran for a doorway that would have led them to safety had they made it.

* * *

"**I still don't like the idea," Jean said as they crowded at the end**** of the corridor. "We've just shown that we can hold this position!" **

Helena said nothing, but her eyes went to the old man who was lying in the corridor, a large pool of blood spreading from a ragged wound in his neck. Rinn was on the other side of the group, staring at the wall, breathing deeply and Helen didn't miss the way her hands were trembling.

_We have to get out of here,_ she thought as she saw Cain round on his friend.

"At what cost?" the other mercenary said. "One life per attack? That were only twenty of them!"

Helen had never liked people shouting and moved away from them without a word, past Calvin fucking tubby who was sitting on the floor with a dazed expression on his face. He smelled bad and nobody was standing near him.

_Would've been better if he died,_ Helena thought bitterly, then scolded herself immediately. She had no right to consider such things. And besides, who would know what kind of people they all were before?

Rinn had heard her approach, because she shifted, but didn't turn towards her. Helen remembered how close the woman had come to shouting at her and wondered what she'd have said if they weren't interrupted by the Brady Bunch. She hesitated, then touched Rinn's elbow, keeping an eye on the shotgun that her friend held in her other hand.

"Rinn," she said softly, trying to block out the two men shouting at each other in the background. "Rinn, we have to go."

Her friend turned to her briefly and Helen was once again struck by how similar in build they were. The world moved differently for tall women. Something tightened behind Rinn's eyes as she looked at her, but she nodded. She looked at the group of people they were leaving behind, hesitated, and then turned her back and started moving down the corridor. Helen, also glancing back at the group of people, wished that she could ask the mercenaries for more ammunition, but knew that they weren't going to budge now that they had done the math and were ready to expect _hundreds_ of husks.

_How did nobody notice?_ Helena wondered as she activated her omnitool's torch once they were past Peggy's body. She had taken some time in their last elevator ride to figure it out, Ramsey's death still fresh in her mind. _How was it that some people just accepted that some of the workers went missing?_

"Where are you going?"

It was Esmi. If it had been anybody else, Helen would just have walked on. But there was no hostility in the older woman's voice, no anger. When Helena turned around to look at her, she was standing halfway between the two groups as if she could not decide with whom she wanted to stay.

Helena bit her lip and glanced at Rinn before she answered.

"We're not staying here," she said. "In this corridor." She glanced at Jean. "I think the risk is too high. And I think we got off lucky this time." She sniffed and rubbed her nose, only to grimace when her hand touched her swollen cheek. "We're going lower. Find some supplies. Medigel." She glanced at Rinn's leg. "None of that's here."

Esmi took a step in their direction then hesitated. "Are you going alone?"

Again, Helen shrugged. The two men had stopped shouting at each other and were looking at them.

"Fuck this," Cain muttered and jogged towards them. "Not alone," he said. "I'm coming with you. We can go to our commissary. We've got ammo and food there. And medigel." He blinked suddenly and took something from his armour. "Here," he said, handing it to Rinn who stood there staring at the packet. "Use that."

Rinn stared at it and did nothing. Helena reached out for it and, when Rinn didn't protest she pulled the packet from her hands. She knew immediately that it was some medigel.

"Cain, you are awesome," she said spontaneously and broke the packet open. In it was one of those quick use hypodermic needles. "Rinn, can I..."

"Cain buddy, you're _not_ serious."

The mercenary grimaced and turned back to his friend. "I am, Jean," he said. "I'm not sitting out here in the open. I'm hungry and I need to have a piss which I don't want to take over the old man's cooling corpse. You know as well as I do that it _might_ be days before help arrives. Fuck, it might even be never. We have to pick a place where we can make a decent stand. Not some corridor where the only option we have is to shoot."

The young man who had spoken up earlier moved forward, pushing past the two women who were still clinging to each other. They were looking at the old man's body with horror. Mentally, Helena couldn't help but dub them _Mary_ and _Sue_.

"I'm coming with you," he said. "I don't fancy pissing on that body either."

Helen decided to ignore them all and knelt down so that she could look at Rinn's leg. She was quite capable of walking on it slowly, but it was too painful to run on. Helena wonder whether it had been caused by some of the jagged metal that Ramsey pulled her through. Her pants were torn, but luckily, it didn't look as if the husks had bitten her. When she touched her friend's leg the young woman hissed and tried to pull away from her.

"It's fine," she barked, but Helena ignored her and seized the torn fabric. The wound was definitively at an awkward place, almost right by her knee. She was encouraged though to see that it wasn't bleeding too much. _Couldn't have nicked an artery... Good..._

Rinn pulled away from her almost violently suddenly and nearly toppled over.

"For fuck's sake," she snapped. "Don't you listen?"

Helena looked up at her and frowned, wondering where Rinn's hostility was coming from. She fiddled with the medigel applicator to try and figure out how it worked.

"You need this," she said simply. "Don't deny it, Rinn. I'm not listening to you because you're not making any sense. Now stand still and let me apply this." She looked at Cain. "You don't have any bandages by any chance?" He and his partner were now in a staring match to write lyrics about. Her words broke the spell and he turned away from Jean.

"In the mess hall," he said. "We can treat it properly there. Give her the medigel then we can go."

At his words, Rinn glared at him, but finally, it seemed to dawn on her that she had no other choice. Her lips were thin as she turned her face away. Helen slipped her fingers into the tear in Rinn clothes and probed her leg for a decent spot to inject. She knew that it was awkward for Rinn, but there was nothing she could do about it now.

* * *

**A hand was touching her.** An actual hand. Not a gloved set of fingers, but a warm hand of flesh and blood. Helena, lying on her right side, squinted at the hand that was resting over her wrist, then traced its arm up to its owner. She was surprised and happy to see Erinn sitting next to her, her friend's gaze locked on something in the corner of the room.

And, she was _so_ relieved to be out of the box. She vaguely remembered being moved, of Miranda strapping her back and explaining to her that she was going to have to be very quiet. She wondered what counted as quiet and shifted slightly to wiggle herself into a more comfortable position. The moment she moved, Rinn's hand shot away from hers like lightening and her friend turned to her bewildered and immediately embarrassed.

"I'm sorry," she said automatically. "I'm sorry. I checked to see if you were warm and..."

Helena smiled at her and slowly, carefully reached out and took Rinn's hand. "It's fine," she said and realised that her mouth was dry. "It's fine." She could not think of anything else to say and just savoured being out of the box. Normally she barely tolerated physical contact but this was... soothing. Rinn sat very still in the moment and, when Helena finally pulled her hand away, quickly put her own in her lap. Their silence was awkward suddenly and it dawned on Helen that it was the first time that they were both awake and able to talk to each other since they arrived on the Normandy.

She shifted and looked around her, the world blurry and twisted.

"Do you know if Mordin brought my glasses back?"

She didn't like the amused look that Rinn had as the woman nodded and reached behind her, handing Helen the pair of spectacles. The ginger took them carefully and squinted at the lenses. She could tell _immediately_ that something was wrong.

"They're thinner," she said. "And lighter. He's gone and changed the lenses." She looked up at Rinn, feeling as if a limb of hers had been amputated. "He messed with my glasses."

Rinn smiled at her and the amused look in her eyes was starting to worry Helen. "Put them on," she said and looked back to the corner of the room at something Helen couldn't make out.

She hesitated, still fuming, and put the glasses on with a practiced gesture. She thought for a moment she saw something move but then the world became clear and she decided that it must've been a trick of the light. Rinn looked at her again as she turned her gaze around the infirmary.

"Better?"

Helen couldn't tell _why_ she was so amused. "Yes?" she said slowly. "A bit. Doesn't feel or look any different." She sniffed, hating to admit the next. "The image _is_ clearer."

Rinn nodded as if she hadn't expected anything less. "Now look into the corner," she said and Helena complied. For the first time she saw a mechanical body simply standing there. Not moving. Nothing.

She blinked. _Legion._ "Tell me that's somebody's idea of bad décor."

Rinn shook her head. "Oh, no," she said – playing along. "Alive and working it seems. It hasn't done anything yet. But, do yourself a favour and look at his hand. Or that hole in his chest. Try and see the wires."

Helen's mouth thinned as she squinted at the blast site where Legion had mysteriously decided that it wanted to fix itself up with a part of Shepard's armour. _They never explored that in ME3… Bastards._ She found a blinking light and… Suddenly the whole image shifted closer and she could see… _EVERYTHING._

"Holy Crap!" Helena exclaimed and tried to sit up. "Holy crap! Rinn! Did you see that?! It zoomed! Holy crap!"

Rinn grinned at her. "He had me test them," she said by way of explanation. "You're eyesight is terrible, you know that right?"

Helen looked at the zoomed image of the geth then turned back to Rinn. The image slowly stabilised back to normal. She got the impression that she was going to have to get used to it because it might give her a headache, but gosh.

"It's awesome," she said. "This is… awesome."

Rinn grinned at her. "Made me wish I had mine here," she said. "You should thank him."

"Thank him?" Helena said and put the glasses back on. "I'll kiss him… And he'll probably turn into a prince or something but…" Rinn smiled at her. "What?"

The other woman shook her head and shifted awkwardly on the chair. "It's good to hear you talking."

Helen settled a bit and smiled embarrassed. She considered reaching out and taking Rinn's hand again, but couldn't make herself follow the gesture through. Instead she turned her head a bit to look around the infirmary. Something pulled on her cheek and when she reached up to touch it she not only felt the tender bruise but a small thin tube as well. _Oxygen,_ she thought and followed it to her nose. _Or something._ The happy feeling that she had had over her glasses drained away.

"Yeah," she said and tried to pull the tube out, wondering why she had it. "Awesome."

Rinn fixed her with a sharp look. "Miranda said to keep that in," she pointed out. "She said…" She paused, sorting out her words first. "That the isolation tank's oxygen content was higher. Or something. You have to adjust."

Helen stopped her fiddling and dropped her hand again. "Figures," she muttered and glanced at Legion, feeling very uncomfortable. She had never liked the geth. Grimacing, she turned back to Rinn and studied her. She was encouraged to see that most of her colour was back. Her friend did look tired and her face was still drawn in pain, but it was _miles_ better than she had last seen her. She considered her friend for a moment and then slowly reached out and found that hand she had put in her lap.

"How are you feeling?" she asked softly. "What... I mean... Your leg?" She fumbled a bit, seeing Rinn's surprise at her gesture. Her friend shifted uncomfortably and shrugged.

"It's... sore," she said and offered no other explanation, choosing instead to elaborate on her leg. "I don't know how much you heard or anything, but they had to dig deeper to get the thing out. I haven't looked yet, but it feels like a crater."

Helena had to refrain from sighing as she tightened her grip on Rinn's hand. "And you?" she asked, seeing the way Rinn's gaze dropped to her hand. Hers were less bruised than Rinn's.

"It's... difficult," Rinn said finally. "But... I'm okay. Still breathing."

Tired, Helena realised that it was the best answer that she would get out of her friend. She smiled at her, quietly thanking her for her honesty and squeezed her hand before letting go. She closed her eyes for a moment to gather herself. She heard Rinn shift beside her and barely heard her friend's soft whisper.

"Sleep if you need to. I'm here."

Helena wanted to open her eyes and say something to lighten the mood, but she heard a noise behind her and shuddered, nearly leaping up.

Rinn reached out and pressed her shoulder down immediately. "It's just the doctor," she said, having anticipated Helena's reaction. "The door's opened."

_Like it did in the mine._

Helena shuddered, but tried to still her nerves. She tried to turn around, but Rinn's hand on her shoulder kept her from doing so.

"You're also not allowed to move too much," her friend pointed out, but her voice and features were hesitant when Dr Chakwas joined them on her side of the bed. The older woman's gaze was sharp for a moment as she studied them, then she seemed to relax.

"I told you only ten minutes," she said in Rinn's direction. "It's been half an hour, love."

Rinn blushed profusely and looked down. "I ah... didn't want to bother... the geth," she muttered under her breath. Helena watched as Dr Chakwas raised an eyebrow and glanced at Legion. She didn't miss the doctor's own distrust of the machine, but the older woman quickly masked it and turned back to her, smiling.

"Hello, Helena," she said warmly. "How are you feeling?"

_Frightened, angry, confused, bitter…_

"I'm fine," Helena said with a weak smile. "I ah…" She swallowed. "Am grateful to be out of there. I'm sorry if I acted… harshly." Not that she could remember, but she had a feeling that she hadn't been very cooperative.

The doctor waved it off and motioned to Rinn to stand up. "You have to go lie down," she said. "You've been up long enough."

Rinn looked cornered and tried to squirm away from the doctor, still blushing as she shook her head. "I can… Get up myself," she muttered, but Chakwas ignored her tone and deftly stepped in behind her. Before Rinn could protest she slipped an arm underneath her shoulder. Her friend resisted for a moment, goosebumps clearly visible on her skin.

"I... Please don't do..." Rinn couldn't quite articulate her need and the doctor was having none of her protest.

"You're not walking on your own," the good doctor said quietly. "I'm not going to hurt you, Rinn."

Her friend looked stubborn and for a moment Helena was pulled back to the corridor where Rinn was yelling at her to run. She shivered and tried to push the memory away. _If I had run, I wouldn't have been here… I wouldn't have met Shepard…_

_Not that it matters. She's not my Shepard._

_Maybe I killed my Shepard when I finished that wretched game… _

She closed her eyes, but not before she saw the look of frustration well up in Rinn's.

"It's not that," Rinn said. "It's just…" She fumbled and grew quiet. Helena took a steadying breath and opened her eyes to see her friend looking at a spot close to the doctor's feet. She sighed and seemed to slump inside herself.

"Alright."

Helena felt for her in that one moment. She wouldn't have liked it either, but it sometimes brought _more_ attention on yourself to fight than to just give in. She had learned to put herself outside of herself in situations such as these. She knew that with her back, she was going to have to endure a _lot_ of touching. And although she didn't like it, she knew she wasn't going to be able to avoid it. But, it would still be hard.

As hard as Rinn's surrender was now.

The doctor didn't make a fuss, but moved slowly in behind her. On her count, Rinn stood up and Chakwas immediately guided her around the chair. She took a firm grip on the arm of Rinn's injured side and put her arm around Rinn's back much like Helen had done when they were running.

_Gods,_ Helena thought and closed her eyes. _Will I ever forget?_

Before Rinn moved out of reach, Helen moved quickly, touched her wrist, squeezed it and retracted her hand quickly. The dark haired woman, stoic and quiet, never reacted as the doctor moved her out of view. Helena sighed miserably and noticed a red button next to her bed. _Self medication?_

_No. No more drugs._

She had to think.

They were clearly still worried about the husk fragment. What had Chakwas said? It had _degenerated_. Which meant that there were some husk cells within Rinn's body. Or, more likely nanocytes. But, there couldn't have been a lot. The wound had been _very_ small in the beginning.

_Fuck me,_ Helena thought angrily. _I should've checked__,__ but we were so busy…_

She heard the shift and opened her eyes to see Chakwas now standing beside her bed again, taking readings with her omnitool. She smiled when Helena looked at her and touched one of the IV lines, adjusting the flow.

"You can sleep if you want to," she said. "You must be very tired."

Helena shook her head and wished that she could glance back and see whether Rinn was alright. Her friend's bed was closest to Chakwas's desk. She swallowed again and wondered if she could ask the doctor for some water.

"Was it... I mean..." She had to think about what she wanted to say, worried that she might show them how concerned she really was. "How's my shoulder?"

Chakwas gave her a professional smile. "Officer Lawson will discuss it with you," she said, then her voice turned kinder. "But it went well. You're very lucky to be here. Officer Lawson is among the best in her field when it comes to reconstruction."

Helena got the sense that Chakwas had said it to her before, but couldn't quite remember. She began to feel uncomfortable and wondered if she could ask the woman if she could turn into a more comfortable position.

"Doctor," she said, trying to keep her voice level. "This is... I mean yes, we are lucky but... We can't pay you for this. I mean... I would love to but..."

The doctor shook her head immediately and touched her wrist, stopping her. "It's free of charge, Helena," she said and glanced back at Rinn to address her as well. "Commander Shepard said that we're to see to you. We're a well-funded operation and we have the resources. Don't worry about it."

Helen heard Rinn move in her bed and her voice was blank when she spoke up.

"Why?"

Chakwas turned to her and frowned for a moment.

"Why what?" she queried and Helena _really_ wished that she could see Rinn's face, because she could not decide what emotion lay in her voice.

"You've already done more than you have to," her friend pointed out, her tone never raising in volume. "You saved our lives. You don't have to do more. Why don't you just drop us off somewhere?"

"Would you rather we do that?"

An unexpected voice joined the infirmary, startling Helena. Before Chakwas could even protest, she forced her body to turn around and lay on her back. The pain was instantaneous and she could not stop the hiss from escaping from between her teeth, but now she could see Shepard and she could see Rinn's surprise over her arrival.

Her friend was floundering, shocked. "I..." Rinn didn't finish her sentence and just stared at Kate. Helen wondered, as she tried to get her breathing back under control and the pain to subside, whether this could be called a plot twist. _Or a plot bunny. _

Shepard's gaze never wavered as she looked at Rinn and her expression was completely calm. Not angry, not hostile, not surprised or even amused. Just... Calm.

"We're on our way to Omega now," the Commander said softly. "We can take you wherever you'd like after that. Granted that you're fit for travel." Her gaze touched Helena then turned back to Rinn.

"No, there's..." she stammered, then paused and glanced at Helena who had managed to breathe through the pain in her back until it subsided a little. She couldn't speak yet though, still too surprised by Shepard's arrival. "I just want to understand why you're..." Rinn trailed off, unable to finish.

She clenched her teeth, gathering herself, then Helena focused on the commander. The woman's attention was on Rinn; her features... strangely intense. Not angry, not hostile. Her words had not been born from impatience, but there was... something. Helena felt as if she was challenging Rinn. _Had they spoken before?_

"Aid is never free, Commander," Helena said, testing out the title. "There is always a price. It's better to know what it is up front than... than to be caught later. And I mean..." She paused and studied Katelyn. "You're Commander Shepard. Last we heard you were dead. Now you're... With Cerberus." Her anger turned inside her suddenly, not towards Katelyn, but towards the idea of being at the Illusive Man's mercy. He had very little regard for human life. "I'd rather not be indebted to them. To Cerberus." She sniffed and realised that she had almost bared her teeth in anger. _What are you, an animal?_ "Can you understand why we're cautious?"

She was surprised by the compassion that she saw in Shepard's gaze. "I can," the commander said calmly. "But I am _not_ Cerberus. And, they're the only ones fighting the Collectors. That's why I'm working with them, using them to fight a common enemy. Surely you can understand that?"

Helena blinked at Katelyn. _Naive?_ She thought and sniffed. "They're the ones using you, Commander," she said, thinking about the Collector's base. "It can't work: training a devil to fight a devil." She heard a soft gasp from Rinn's direction, but forged on. "And it doesn't explain your charity to us. That's what Rinn was getting at. Why are you helping us? Why are you wasting resources on us when you obviously have bigger fish to fry?"

Helena felt something pass through the room and could tell immediately that she had said the wrong thing. Chakwas was the biggest indicator. The doctor was frowning at her, her kindness and compassion from earlier gone. Even Rinn looked dismayed.

And Katelyn, Commander Katelyn Shepard, was simply staring at her and there was _something_ in her gaze that frightened Helena. It was anger. It was darkness.

It was desperation.

"Lena," Rinn breathed and her tone hinted that Helen should've been ashamed of herself.

_Ashamed?_ Helen thought, furious suddenly. _I did nothing wrong! I am showing her the truth!_ She looked at Shepard and found that the woman was still looking at her, hands clenched at her sides, her features dark with fury. Rinn shifted on her side of the room and spoke up, her voice dry and frightened suddenly as if she didn't quite know what she was stepping into.

"Commander, please," she whispered and the plea was perhaps not to _listen_, but to calm down. "It's..." _Okay? It won't be,_ Helena thought. _Not when she becomes indoctrinated.__ Is she already?_ "You've saved us," Rinn still tried to speak. "We wouldn't be here if you hadn't... But... we're on a Cerberus ship. And they... We're just..." _Scared._

Katelyn turned to Rinn, visibly breathing deeply. "We wouldn't have had you on this ship if we were planning on hurting you," she said almost in a hiss, then she shot an angry look at Helena. "We wouldn't have had you on this ship at all." The woman's eyes were fierce and scared Helena as they pierced into her. "We were there because we picked up on the beacon and we had hoped to offer some assistance. We were there for no other reason than to _help_. That a reaper artefact was housed there was coincidental. How and why are questions we don't have answers to and we know you don't have any either." She paused, closed her eyes and then let out a slow breath. The anger vanished and, in its stead came sadness. "I saw you two fight," she said softly. "I saw your fear, your courage and all of us can see your injuries. I am not about to turn my back on you like your employers did. Like the galaxy seems to have," she turned back to Helena. "You don't deserve that."

It was perhaps the fact that the commander hadn't shouted. The fact that she looked hurt and no longer angry. But as Katelyn spoke her last words, Helena felt her own anger shift and it was replaced by a deep ache she could not justify. She had to close her eyes, break away from the commander's gaze to fight not to start crying. When she felt a calmer a few seconds later, she opened her eyes again and tried to meet Katelyn's.

"I'm sorry." It was the only words she could find.

There was a pulsing silence in the infirmary for a moment and Helena realised that Chakwas had moved her hand to her shoulder. Whether it was to comfort her or hold her back, she could not say.

"We're just... afraid, Commander," Rinn finally confessed the words that Helen was to proud to say. "We just... don't know what to make of... everything." _Being here. Being injured._

Being alive.

_Is there a price for living?_ Helena thought, watching Katelyn as she shifted. _For beating the odds?_

"You're afraid that our help comes at a cost," Katelyn whispered softly and shook her head. She took a step closer to Rinn, then seemed to stop herself. "You earned it already." Her features became softer and she risked looking at Helena again. Though her gaze was now gentle, the memory of the woman's anger would stay with Helen for a while and she closed her eyes again.

"I don't know how it feels to be trapped in a mine with monsters, waiting to die," Katelyn continued. "But I do know what it feels like to be helped by people you don't know for no apparent reason. My whole family died on Mindoir. And I was left there. Stranded. Alone among the dead and dying. And, then help finally came. Too late for most; certainly too late for me. I found myself wondering _why_ people were helping me. Why people were so goddamned kind to an orphaned colony kid who had nobody left." She paused and Helen could _hear _her swallow. "But the answer is simply that there are good people out there, like the people that I have on this ship. Who allow me to make the decisions that I do. And, when I decide to help two people also for no apparent reason, then they accept it. As you should."

The infirmary was so quiet that one could have heard a pin drop . Helena opened her eyes and looked up at Chakwas through a haze of tears. She was only mildly relieved to realise that the doctor wasn't paying attention to her, but was transfixed rather by Shepard with an expression which Helena could only describe as quiet horror. Not even Rinn moved and finally, Helena risked a look in Shepard's direction again. Katelyn and Rinn were staring at each other, until the latter finally nodded and dropped her gaze. Shepard didn't look at Chakwas or Helena, but turned on her heel and left the room, breaking the spell.

The doctor breathed as if she had been holding her breath throughout Shepard's speech. Then, she stirred and smiled down at Helena with so much understanding and sympathy that Helena felt her tears increase. _Damn her._ Chakwas squeezed her shoulder and stood back from the bed.

"Try and get some sleep," she whispered, as if unconsciousness held all the answers to the world's problems, and looked to Rinn. "Both of you. Helena, let's move you back on your side. Please don't move again unless we're here to help."

She nodded and allowed the woman to help her lie on her right side. She could see Rinn now, dull green eyes still staring in the direction Shepard had left. Helena, not sure what else to do, closed her eyes and lay there, waiting for sleep but dreading it.

_There is no reprieve_, she thought. _None._

* * *

**For once, Miranda wasn't seated at her desk, but instead stood staring over the shoulder of Kelly Chambers, who had her face almost pressed against the monitors, watching the scene unfolding. **Neither of them said a word as they listened to Helena come as close to challenging Shepard as a stranger ever had.

"They're the ones using you, Commander," the ginger said, her voice tight and low with anger. "It can't work: training a devil to fight a devil."

Kelly sat back, making a murmuring sound. "She doesn't like us much, does she?" She said, glancing up at Miranda who was frowning.

"No," the XO murmured. "It would not appear so." Of course, she could not make herself deny what the stranger had pointed out. In some way they _were_ using Shepard. What was it that the Illusive Man had said to her two years ago?

_See to it that we don't lose her._

She had pulled Katelyn Shepard back from death in order to throw her into another suicide mission. _Will there be rest for me when I die?_

"Do you think they have a history with Cerberus?"

Kelly glanced away from the screen for a moment to look at her. "It would be easy enough to find out I think," she said carefully. "We can send out a message the different sections. Or put in the request anyway." She shrugged and turned back to the screen with a frown. "But do we want to know?"

Miranda couldn't answer her immediately. She knew that there were some elements of Cerberus that she would rather not know about and some that she did not want Katelyn to be informed of. The commander was clearly touchy on the subject and she didn't want to risk these two newcomers alienating her further.

But it would be in the Normandy's best interest to know if the two had crossed paths with the organization before.

"I think we should ask around," she said. "If you have contacts, use them. The more we know about them, the better."

Kelly glanced back at her. "Do you think they were placed in the mine to infiltrate us?"

Miranda had to consider this for a moment, but quickly dismissed it. "No," she said. "Our arrival was too random. And they very nearly died, Yeoman. There would've been easier ways to insert them." She studied Kelly's features, wondering how much the Yeoman saw. "Do you think they're dangerous?" She asked Kelly as Rinn spoke softly, her voice worried. She seemed to be trying to calm the situation down. It was only her tone of voice that alerted Miranda to Shepard's reaction. Katelyn was clearly trying to compose herself, her anger clear. What Helena had said had clearly upset her.

"They're the sole survivors of a massacre that claimed five hundred people at least," Kelly said softly, also watching Shepard's reaction. "That's worse than the Akuze fiasco a couple of years ago." Her mouth thinned, telling Miranda what she had thought of _that_ experiment. "So, I think we're right to be cautious. But dangerous?"

The yeoman mused it over, looking at the conversation for a moment. She tapped the screen, motioning to Helena. "She's smart, Officer Lawson, and she can think on her feet, in a lot of ways I think that she's the decision maker. Or, the one Rinn trusts to make the right decisions quickly. So keep an eye on her, because her hostility's the clearest. If she turns on us, Rinn will do so out of loyalty I think."

Miranda wanted to ask what she thought of Rinn but the conversation in the infirmary suddenly froze all words in her mouth. _"My whole family died in Mindoir_." Shepard's voice was calm, calculated. As if she was talking about ordering food for the ship's commissary. _"And I was left there. Stranded. Alone among the dead and dying. And, then help finally came. Too late for most; certainly too late for me. I found myself wondering why people were helping me. Why people were so goddamned kind to an orphaned colony kid who had nobody left."_ When she paused, Miranda realised with a touch of horror that she could _see_ a brief, but _intense_ look of pain cross Shepard's features. _Her brother._ Kelly had her hand over her mouth in shock, also unable to believe what she was hearing. _"But the answer is simply that there are good people out there,"_ Shepard continued, _"like the people that I have on this ship. Who allow me to make the decisions that I do. And, when I decide to help two people also for no apparent reason, then they accept it. As you should."_

Nothing was said after that, the infirmary was so quiet Miranda couldn't even hear the machine's monitors. She watched in shock as Shepard and Rinn stared at each other, _something_ passing between them that she could not begin to phantom. Helena was simply lying on her back her eyes closed. Miranda didn't move and it was only when Shepard turned and left that she heard Kelly breathe.

For a moment, neither of them could say anything.

_She has never spoken to me of Mindoir,_ Miranda thought. _But perhaps... With others..._

"She's never mentioned Mindoir," Kelly breathed as if hearing her thoughts. "Never. Not even to Garrus. Or Tali. Liara yes, on the first Normandy, but... never here. Not to us."

Her voice was filled with disbelief and it gave Miranda the answer that she needed though it didn't make her feel any easier.

"What triggered it?" she asked, trying to keep her voice clinical. _Too late for most; certainly too late for me..._ "Why now?"

Kelly moved, though it seemed as if she was forcing herself. She tapped the screen as she had with Helena, but this time there was no consideration but still pure shock. She had sent several reports to Miranda from the beginning, detailing Shepard's behaviour and always, she had said that it would take _a lot_ to put a dent in the woman's armour.

"Rinn," Kelly said finally. "I think it is Rinn. The woman's lying Miranda." No Officer Lawson here. "She _knows_ Shepard. And Shepard might not be able to remember where, but her subconscious is trying to. I think that's what's pulling her into... Mindoir." _The past. Her failures._ Kelly turned to Miranda to give her a wide-eyed look. Miranda found herself rubbing her brow, then stopping the gesture immediately. Not around Kelly. She noticed too much.

"What makes you say that?"

Kelly bit her lip, her own little tell-tale sign that she was caught off guard. "She's trying to _anticipate_ Shepard," she said. "I've seen it a lot in sessions. When people speak to a psychiatrist, they're always on their guard, always planning to prepare for the next question. Because it's so private. When you see someone enough, they tend to learn your ways, your habits, so you have to _really_ work at it to keep a conversation rolling. Sometimes the smart and unwilling ones can learn to talk around you. So, you have to try and do some anticipating as well. You don't do it in the first sessions." She touched the screen where Rinn was still staring in the direction that Shepard had left. "That's what she's doing. She has some... Some _reference_ that makes her think that she can predict Shepard's movements. Helena doesn't, look how easy it was for Kate to take the wind from her sails." Her mouth thinned. "Though I don't think she's going to let it happen again so quickly once she's thought about it. But Rinn..." She shook her head. "She was trying to predict the conversation. And this last bit surprised her as much as it did us. Because I think she _knows_ it's not something Shepard mentions often."

They were both silent, trying to wrap their heads around it. Miranda decided what she wanted to say before Kelly did.

"How are we going to deal with this?"

Kelly looked unsure as she glanced up at her and shook her head. "I'd say that I'll talk to the Commander," she said sombrely. "But you know she's not going to open up to me." She hesitated. "She trusts you more."

Miranda raised an eyebrow and gave the woman a curious look. She was reminded again of why they had brought Kelly. Warm, kind, friendly – yet always watching. Always monitoring. She was the pulse of the Normandy.

"How so?"

Kelly hesitated and looked away, glancing at her notes. "That business with your sister," she said. "Your general professionalism. You do your job, Officer Lawson ,and you do it well. Shepard's always respected that. And Illium... That showed the commander that you're human. Something you don't show very often."

Miranda made a sound in the back of her throat and made a point to glare at the yeoman, though she was secretly impressed.

"Don't get too comfortable, Chambers," she warned. "What else do you suggest?"

Kelly hesitated and shrugged. "Talk to them," she said. "Carefully. Individually, if possible. It's easy in a way, Rinn is mobile. When her leg's stronger, we can move her out. Or say, give her a room with the crew or in the Port Observation. Nobody's using that at the moment. But, I don't want to wait _that_ long to talk to them." She looked at the screen where it showed that both of the young women were lying down with their eyes closed and their body's pulled into as tight a position as their separate conditions allowed. "They're raw now."

There was an awkward pause suddenly and Miranda frowned, suspecting that Kelly was either going to ask her something extremely personal or tell her something she wouldn't like hearing. She crossed her arms and frowned at the young woman, waiting.

"What have you told the Illusive Man?" Kelly asked and was silent, not needing to say anything else.

Miranda raised an eyebrow and hesitated, cautious now. "I told him we picked up two survivors," she said. "I don't want to tell him anything more until I have more facts. I don't want to waste his time." _Nor tell him that we're wasting Cerberus resources again due to what he called Shepard's bleeding heart..._ "You?"

Kelly looked both awkward and relieved. "The same," she said. "Nothing else."

They looked at each other, calculating.

_We're both holding back for Shepard's sake,_ Miranda thought and the idea made her uncomfortable but she didn't dare show it. _She holds our loyalty now. She certainly holds Kelly's._

"Well," she said. "That's good then. Yeoman, I think you should go over this session again. Makes notes, see what more you can come up with. I'm quite willing to cooperate with you so that we can get to the bottom of this. And them." She motioned to the screen.

Kelly nodded and stood up quickly, taking her notes with her. "I'll ask EDI to make me a copy," she said. "I'll keep you informed." She hesitated and sighed. "I think if we don't push them, Miranda, they're not going to push back. But, we need to push them to find out... A lot of things." She bit her lip. "I don't think Rinn will _do_ anything. But keep an eye on Helena. I don't know how you're going to do that. There's some clear hostility there. And, I think Rinn is just hiding hers very well. Or," she chuckled softly. "Aware that Helena has _more_ than enough hostility for the both of them. Why light your own fire if your neighbour's house is burning down?"

Miranda raised an eyebrow at the image and tried not to smile. "Thank you for your help, Yeoman," she said simply. "Keep me informed if you think of something new."


	7. Chapter 6

_AN: For those of you who are wondering, yes we are messing with the timeline. ;) Necessity demands it._

**Chapter 06**

Katelyn Shepard's eyes slid open slowly and she drew a shaky breath as the final images of the dream released her. She had been in the trunk again, peering through the keyhole, watching Thomas and the batarian and the mercenary's makeshift spear. This time she had managed to reach her younger brother before he died. This time she barely waited for his murderer to leave. She knew the batarian wasn't going to see her anyway, too distracted by the massacre beyond. The burning buildings, the screaming, the barbarous laughter.

This time when she knelt beside Thomas, his chest was still rising and falling. His wounds were still beyond her. The spear had cut too deep into his chest, but he was still alive for that moment longer; that moment where she could murmur her apologies and he could forgive her. His broad shoulders shifted ever so slightly underneath her fingers when he nodded his acceptance. His words were clear even though it shouldn't have been. But it didn't matter. He had forgiven her. She had apologized to him. She had been given that extra precious moment to do so.

But that hadn't happened. Not in real life. Thomas had already been dead before she reached him; already dead even before the mercenary had wrenched the weapon out of his body. It should've been her protecting him, not the other way around. Her fate would no doubt have been very different and she knew Thomas wouldn't have just hid away. He still would've fought and still would've died, but she couldn't look past it. She couldn't look past the fact that she should've acted instead of listening to her fifteen-year old brother and following his desperate commands. He was the first she had failed.

_I'm sorry. I'm so sorry._

Katelyn wiped her eyes and the bedside table began taking shape. She kept her gaze on it for a second, then pushed herself up and climbed out of bed. It had been a long time since she had dreamt of Mindoir, but she never forgot. Thomas always lingered - one of the many shades who did. The red head padded up to her bathroom and washed her face, then returned to her desk, checking her console for messages. The Illusive Man had been very quiet ever since they retrieved the reaper IFF, seemingly content to wait for reports from the Normandy to be sent to him. Katelyn mostly left that to Miranda.

Her nap didn't last as long as she had hoped, but there would be no rest for her even if she tried. Instead she leaned against the wall behind her and stared at her model ships. Each contained a reminder. A memory. A tough decision or a failure. Things she didn't want to forget.

Things she couldn't.

Her eyes fixed on the Kodiak. _Mindoir_. She stepped towards her display case and carefully retrieved the model ship, then turned it over and clipped loose its hidden latch. In it was a tiny vial of soil and a datacard. The latter she took, closing the ship's hatch and placing it on the desk beside her console. She sat, loading the disk onto an off-line datapad and began scrolling through its contents.

Names, places, rumoured sightings, possible leads. People still missing. Those confirmed dead. Those saved from captivity and slavery.

Katelyn hadn't had time to continue her search since her... death. It was fortunate that she had kept copies of her work stored off ship. There hadn't been time since the Lazarus base, but there was time now. A couple of hours here and there. She didn't keep a copy on the Normandy's network. The commander used what sources she had at her disposal - through Cerberus and otherwise - but didn't feel comfortable storing a full record of her work anywhere other than on the small discs; occasionally replacing her outdated copy on the Citadel with the latest one.

Talitha was on the list under those recovered. Katelyn had managed to reach the woman before she killed herself and a recent letter assured the commander that Talitha was in fact on the mend. No mention was made of the cranial implant she no doubt still had.

_Maybe that's why I dreamt of Mindoir again._ The red head sighed. _Maybe it's Rinn._ Both were likely.

Whatever the reason, it now only spurred her on as she resumed her search. Most of those taken captive during the massacre may never be recovered again. But there might be some. Some. And that was better than nothing.

* * *

**She didn't sleep. She couldn't sleep.**

Helena lay awake though she didn't dare open her eyes in fear of Dr Chakwas sedating her again. The pain medication was doing a good enough job as it was to spin her world and she didn't feel comfortable with any more drugs in her system. She suspected that it was partly the pain medication's fault that she wasn't sleeping. As tired and drowsy as it made her, it also frayed the self-control she usually had over her thoughts and they were going _everywhere_.

At first, she thought of the day she bought Mass Effect, of that giddy afternoon where she shared a kiss with a complete stranger, because she was high on life and happy to be going home. Those days were rare for her and she savoured it. She remembered playing and thought of how much she had _struggled_ to complete the Horizon mission. That made her think of the husks and suddenly, her thoughts returned to those endless hours in the mine. She tried to stop it, to think of something else, but her thoughts kept going there. Her mind kept replaying each hour at varying speeds, analysing every single thought she had, every single decision she had made. She wasn't one to cry over spilt milk, but she liked to learn from her mistakes, _forced_ herself to learn.

That was the way she worked.

And the truth was, Helena had made a lot of mistakes in the past few days and in those precious hours. Her thoughts kept returning to that tunnel when Rinn pushed her away and told her to run. She would never have left her friend behind, that thought had never crossed her mind, but it had dawned on Helena that if she had _listened_ to Rinn, then she might've had enough time to try and figure out how to keep the door open. But, she had been _stubborn_ and wasted precious, _precious_ time proving just how stubborn she was.

And she would regret it. The scars that she'd undoubtedly have from the husk's hands would remind her.

Another thing she regretted was not looking at Rinn's leg when she needed to. Heck, she regretted that Rinn had gotten injured. She should've just pulled her away from the elevator and forced her to leave Ramsey behind.

_A husk fragment, _Helena thought with a sick pit in her stomach. _What implications w__ill__ it have?_

She took a steadying breath and tried to remember what Dr Chakwas had said. The piece had... what? Fragmented? How could a husk piece fragment? Could husks lose their physical integrity? Did the cells degenerate?

_No,_ she thought. _They didn't have cells. Not anymore. Or, they were changed._

How?

_They were shoved on spikes. Nanocytes were pumped into them to convert them. Nanocytes. Small mechanical cells._

She opened her eyes and stared at the blank wall. Behind her she could hear Dr Chakwas get up from her station again and move to check up on Ris. She went to her friend, not stopping by Helena's bed.

_Why?_

Her mind was blank but she closed her eyes and forced herself to think. It was like spreading out her thoughts and opening up all the doors in the house of her head; looking for any information that might be able to help her understand her current circumstances. _Nanocytes. Small mechanical cells. Cells needed to communicate. Husk cells needed to transform their hosts. Their victims. But, they were put on spikes. __You thought about this before. Focus._ _Spikes that pumped them full of nanocytes._ She saw, in her mind's eye, the CGI trailer of ME3 that they had released, where it showed a body turning into a husk. That took... what? Hours? Rinn had been fine for days. And they weren't giving her any other medication. They were monitoring her friend, more so than they were her but...

Helen wanted to shout suddenly and scream out her frustration. Why couldn't she think?

_Focus. _

She went back to square one when she heard the infirmary door open. Helena tried to listen to whom it might be, closing her eyes to try and hear better. It sounded like Miranda, the steps confident and as if there were heels involved.

_Pretty stupid footwear..._ She opened her eyes to find that Miranda had managed to get right in front of her. Their gazes met and there was no faking sleep.

Miranda looked at her in what could only be described as exasperation. And annoyance.

"You should be resting," she whispered probably for Rinn's sake who could've been asleep if she wasn't faking it. Helena wished that she could sit up and look at the XO, but she realised that she would have to be content with looking up at her contours.

_Not that __I__ d__o__n't appreciate the view,_ she found herself thinking. _There were less pleasant things than staring up at Miranda's..._ _Focus._

"I'm thinking," she answered simply, also whispering. "Please. Let me."

Miranda frowned at her, a gesture so small she wouldn't have noticed it if she hadn't _known_ the woman. She trusted her judgement of Miranda at least. Regardless of who Shepard was, her crew remained the same.

"What are you thinking about?" Miranda asked softly and sat down on the bed so that she could be closer to her. "If I may ask." The last was said dryly, as if she was expecting resistance. And, she had reason to expect it.

Helena felt her heart rate increase in anticipation as she sniffed and fiddled with the oxygen line in her nose. "Rinn," she breathed, the word barely audible. "You're monitoring her more closely than you do me."

Miranda raised an eyebrow and glanced at her friend's bed. "She lost a lot of blood," she said. "Her heart nearly stopped."

Helena bit her lip and wondered how she was going to continue speaking without sounding hostile. "Two days ago or... however long we've been here," she said. "She's had plasma which means that... You feel she's in the clear. Blood wise at least. I mean, the body replaces its own fluid within 48 or 72 hours after severe blood loss. And..." She struggled, forcing herself to think, reminding herself to whisper. "She's up and about already. She can _get_ up. I can't or... You won't let me. What are you monitoring?"

Miranda looked at her and she could feel those clear blue eyes weighing her.

"What do you think we're monitoring?" she queried, answering the question with a question.

_Charming woman,_ Helena thought bitterly. _Using my own evil tactics against me._

"Matter left over from the husk fragment," she whispered. "Cells probably. Nanocytes." She could not stop herself from shivering. "I think you're monitoring their reactivity level. Or, you're trying to determine what they're doing."

Miranda's eyes never left hers and she could feel their weight, their judgement. "What do you know about the husks?" She asked. "Do you know what they are?"

_All too well,_ Helena thought, but didn't want to open _that_ conversation. "I know they're machines. Or they used to be human," her mind flashed with a memory, of the husk leaping against the window as some of the people who had come in with her just stood at the bottom. Confused, but not running. Waiting. It had certainly indoctrinated some of the scientists and mercenaries.

Fury burned inside her. _'I'm coming with you. I don't fancy pissing on that body either.'_ Liar.

"Helena?"

She looked up at the Cerberus officer and had to swallow, pulling her thoughts back.

"Do you expect her to turn into one of those things?" It was the most direct question that she could think of and she hoped that Miranda wouldn't dodge it. _Please, I answered your questions... Please._

Miranda was silent for a very long time, her gaze moving from Helena to Rinn. She looked at the young woman's back, her mouth thinning to a line before she started to reach up... Then paused.

"I don't think it's possible," she said finally and Helena knew for the first time that she had been _right_. That it had been a husk fragment. And, there was still some of it left inside Rinn. "Can you guess why?"

Helena blinked and paused, feeling suddenly as if she was being tested. She looked at the wall, then at Miranda.

"Equal matter conversion," she said finally and the woman actually looked impressed.

"Yes," she said. "Equal matter conversion. Can you explain to me what that means?"

Helena had to focus, spreading her mind beyond her degree in science to her imagination. To _science fiction._

"What you put in you get out," she said slowly. "A husk would weigh just as much as its human counterpart..."

"Which it doesn't," Miranda corrected her. "They're _heavier._"

Helena hesitated, then realised that she had been thinking of the answer all along. "Because they're seeded with nanocytes," she said. "They probably what... break down the cells? Replace them? They can't just convert human cells into nanocytes because... Because... Because alchemy doesn't exist. You can't create something out of nothing. You can't make gold out of lead." Her mouth went dry with relief. "Am I right?"

Miranda's features never changed as she nodded. "In theory," she said and got up. "Now tell me Helena, where did you learn all of this?"

_Fuck._

She didn't know how to answer that question.

"I pick things up," she said finally. "I listened. And one of the scientists who worked on the artefact... Who knew how it worked... He ah... He was with us. He spoke about these things."

Miranda had gone to her back and was now carefully running her fingers over the strapping that she had put over her wounds. "And you took in quite a lot, didn't you?" she said. "Where you near the artefact? Did you see how it worked? You spoke of indoctrination. You _understand_ what it means?"

_Yes,_ Helen thought bitterly. _And so will you, in time._

"We know what happened to Saren," Helena said. "We know what happened on Eden Prime. And the Citadel. And with Matriarch Benezia." _Might as well throw that in there._ "Where we worked, we heard a lot of things. So, it's not hard to form the full picture." She hesitated. Flinched. "That hurts."

Miranda made a murmuring sound. "You're moving didn't do you any favours," she said. "I told you to remain quiet, Helena. These grafts are delicate."

_I__ can't,_ Helena thought bitterly and closed her eyes, feeling very tired suddenly. She had out thought and out played herself.

_But,_ she thought bitterly. _We were outplayed from the start..._

* * *

"**We should go to the lower levels," the young man was saying, "make sure that all the doors are closed. You have an internal staircase?"**

The mercenary glanced at him and shook his head. They were in their mess hall, which was quite a large room seeming able to house easily a hundred people sitting down. He had showed Helena how to lock the doors properly and she was busy with that, having bid Rinn to sit down for a second and rest. Her friend was pale as a sheet and silent as the grave. The only reaction Helena could sense from her was the way her eyes followed her as she moved from door to door.

_Angry?_ Helena thought. _Frightened?_ She couldn't tell.

"We're closing the stairway door," Cain said. "We're sealing ourselves right here. If you want a soft mattress to sleep on, you can go down and get one yourself."

Helena snorted with laughter which didn't quite materialise. "What about ammunition?" she queried, raising her voice to reach them and stop what ever comment the scientist might make. "Is that on the lower levels or here?"

Cain turned away from the young man and grinned at her. "Speaking like a woman after my own heart," he said. "It's down the corridor. When we have only one door left, we can go and get as much as we can carry. I'm planning for a long siege."

Esmi, Helen wasn't sure whether she was a scientist yet or not, looked up at him. Worried.

"You don't think you're people will come early?"

Cain hesitated and once again glanced at Helen. It was a brief gesture, as if he expected her to contribute to his argument if he needed her. It made her uncomfortable, because she suddenly felt as if he considered them to be responsible for the rest of the gathered.

"I don't think we should bargain on it," he said. "Hey, you..." He motioned to the scientist again. "What's your name?"

The scientist blinked at them where he had been bringing bottles of water from the kitchen. "William," he said. "Are you sure we shouldn't go a level down? These are a lot of doors that have to be watched."

Helena, finishing with the last door, stood up and shook her head. "They're not smart," she said. "These things." She looked at her friend. "Right?"

Rinn's mouth thinned, but she nodded tightly. "A properly locked door should keep them out," she said shortly and went quiet, her comment made.

"Okay," Cain said. "You share my thoughts. Right people," he raised his voice though it wasn't necessary. They weren't a lot and they weren't far from each other. Helena accepted the water from William and looked at Cain, wondering what he was going to say.

"When was the last time any of you ate and slept?" It was not the question she had expected and frowned, though she didn't comment, waiting to see what the other two's reaction would be. They also seemed puzzled by the question and, when nobody answered, Cain elaborated a little.

"Look," he said. "I told you guys, I think we're going to be here a while. I think it's important that there are always one or two of us that are awake and alert. Those who aren't, should rest. We don't know what's going to happen, we might be playing pickup sticks here till we're rescued, or we might be fighting for our lives every five minutes. It's important that we have a system." He looked to Helena who sighed and looked at Rinn.

"Seems good," she said. "If you want to know about us, we haven't slept in..." _Since when?__ Neither of us slept last night._ "A while. Haven't eaten anything since breakfast. And it had been so unappetising, we didn't really touch that either." _Not that she was hungry._

Cain nodded. "Then why don't you two go to the kitchen and get yourselves sorted? Take stock of our supplies, while you're at it," he hesitated. "There should be more than enough. We were about sixty guards. Give or take. Now, we're only five here."

_Only five,_ Helena thought. _We could've been eight. Or nine at least._ She tried not to think of the people who stayed behind by the door. She didn't really care about them. Not really. But she knew that they would die. That their decision to remain there would kill them. She blamed the mercenary, because he should've known better.

She went to Rinn and offered her an arm.

"Let's go get something to eat," she said and tried to grin. "I'm _starving._" She had expected her friend to comment on it, but the woman simply pushed herself away from the cupboard and limped in the direction of the kitchen. Helena frowned at her retreating back, feeling uneasy. She wondered whether she should comment on it, but true to form, she decided that she'd rather avoid confrontation than create it.

She followed Rinn after putting her gun on safe and slipping it into the back of her pants. She thought of Stephen King and wondered whether she would ever be able to finish the Dark Tower now.

_Oh, Discordia…_

Rinn was in the kitchen before her, opening and closing some of the cupboards in that _I'm looking for something but seeing nothing _kind of way_._ Then she paused and closed her eyes, leaning against the counter in a grimace of pain. Helena looked at her leg and saw that it had started bleeding again.

_Maybe another shot of medigel?_

"I think I should look at your leg again," she said and looked around the kitchen. "There should be a first-aid kit here somewhere."

Rinn glanced at her, and shook her head sharply. "It's fine," she said. "You don't have to bother." The anger in her voice was clear and Helen frowned at her, wondering if it was from the pain.

"I think I should give you more medigel," she said. "Or some sort of painkiller. Let me see what's around."

"You don't listen, Helena," Rinn snapped, surprising her. "You don't _listen_ to me."

The ginger blinked, wondering where the hostility came from. She took a moment to look at Rinn, _really_ look at her. She always did so with people when she felt as if they responded in a way totally against what she had been expecting. Being an INTJ, she didn't have that intuitional feeling side that the Myers and Briggs F's had, but that had forced her to learn to read people. And sometimes, it helped to ask.

"Rinn, what's bothering you?" She asked frankly. "Is it the pain? You're leg? If it is, you shouldn't take it out on me. I'm trying to help."

"You could've helped by leaving!" Rinn snapped. "That's how you could've helped!" Now Helena was completely confused, not sure what Rinn was on about. _Does she want me to leave? Does she need space?_

"You could've made it!" Her friend continued before she could reply. "You could've been on the other side of that _fucking_ door, if you had just listened to me!"

_Oh. That._ Helen raised an eyebrow and just stared at her friend, unsure of how to proceed. Her first instinct was always to reply to anger _with_ anger, but she had long since learned that _that_ didn't necessarily work. And, regardless, Rinn's tirade wasn't done yet.

"If instead of…" She continued and paused, stumbling over her words. That seemed to frustrate her more and she looked positively furious with herself as she cursed. "Damn it…"

Thinking that she was done, Helena took a step forward.

"Rinn," she said, trying to keep her tone reasonable. "That wouldn't have happened."

Furious green eyes turned to hers. "Really?" Rinn snapped. "So, now what? Now you're stuck here with me and you didn't have to be. How does all that bravado help you now?" She had no doubt that Rinn would've continued to keep her gaze, but then she dropped her head suddenly and wiped at her eyes. "Fuck," she whispered. "Fuck. Not now."

Helen looked at her warily, not quite sure how to respond. She sniffed and glanced into the mess hall where the others were still standing. If they had heard the shouting, which they undoubtedly did considering the volume and range of Rinn's voice, they had to have decided that they weren't going to interfere. She tried to imagine what Rinn wanted from her, what she hoped to achieve with this shouting, but her mind came up with nothing. So, she hugged her chest and shrugged.

"And what would that say of me," she said softly, carefully voicing her thoughts. "If I had left you. If I had abandoned you."

Rinn looked at her aghast and glared. "What would it matter?!" She snapped. "I _told_ you to go!"

Helena snorted and tried to untangle what she was feeling in that moment without her need to shout back at Rinn interfering. She shifted and shrugged.

"It matters to me," she said simply and, in one instant, tried to imagine living with the knowledge that she had abandoned a good friend to death. The thought left her feeling tainted. "I have to live with myself. You can't make decisions for me." _Nobody could._ She fixed Rinn with a simple, non-hostile look, pretending not to see the tears that were trailing down her cheeks. _It's from frustration anyway._

Rinn looked at her and Helen could see how she struggled with herself, and how in that one instant she wished that she was someone else so that words would come easier to her.

"Well," the injured woman said bitterly. "Now you can go introduce yourself to a husk and tell it that you thought it would be nice of you to stay behind. I'm sure it would agree."

Helen smiled slightly, ignoring the sarcasm. It was pretty easy to lash out with it. "I'm pretty sure it will," she said. "And then we can also introduce it to our new friends. And their shiny toys." She decided suddenly that all she and Rinn needed was some coffee, then they'd feel _much_ better. "Let's make some coffee." She started to step forward, but Rinn put an arm in front of her, the fury still clear in her eyes.

"I'm not done," she snapped, but she didn't have anything else to say immediately. Again Helen got that impression that she was struggling with her own words, struggling to get them right.

"You're worried about what it would say of you," Erinn said slowly, angrily. "But, how the fuck do you think you being here makes me feel?"

Helena had a hard time knowing what she felt for the most of her life, but didn't think that it was a good time to point it out to Rinn. Her friend's hostility and raw anger was beginning to make her uncomfortable. The urge to shout at her to back off came and went and finally, she sniffed and shoved her hands into her pockets. She wanted to step away, but that would've been very hard. And, it might show how uneasy she was.

"What would you have done in my place?" she queried, already knowing the answer.

Rinn glared murder at her and pointed a finger in her direction. "This isn't about what I'd have done," she said. "This is about what happened. There are no hypotheticals here."

Helen glared at her and sniffed. "This isn't about hypotheticals," she said, feeling insulted suddenly. "There was only _one_ outcome Rinn, only one solution. All the others… They'd have been _wrong_. For me and for you. _If_ I had run with that wench Peggy, I might've been killed by the husks. And then? What then?"

Rinn was fuming Helena could see that, but she could also pick up her frustration. This was that one instant in which they weren't speaking the same language and in which they'd _never_ speak the same language. Helen knew without a doubt that she'd feel what she felt, and Rinn would feel what she did. She knew where Rinn was coming from, but the young woman was _wrong_. She had been _wrong_ to expect Helena to run without her.

_What would it say of me?_ She thought bitterly.

"You'd still have had a shot," Rinn said finally, angry. "You'd have stood a chance."

_No, I wouldn't have._ Helena sniffed and shrugged, meeting her friend's angry gaze again. "And now we both have one," she said simply, keeping her voice calm and reasonable.

"Bullshit," Rinn snapped immediately. "All we have now is time until those fuckers come and rip us to shreds."

Helen smiled slightly and shook her head. "No," she said and was surprised to realise that she was pretty _sure_ of herself. "We have time and husks to kill until Shepard comes for us. And, she will come. We just have to hold out long enough." And she meant it. This was a story after all. All of _life_ was a story. And, the hero always came. Shepard would come. Bioware might've let Helena down, but Shepard never had.

_We will fight, we will sacrifice and we will find a way…_

Rinn gaped at her and closed her eyes. When there were no words for her there, she cursed and shook her head.

"Damn it, Lena," she said softly and Helen could hear that her anger was melting away to despair. "Why couldn't you just have run?"

Helena smiled at her, but it was a calculated smile without much humour. She could feel that the situation had defused itself, but she was still cautious of Rinn's mood. She felt for her. She could feel the deep pit of pain her presence caused in her friend but… Well…

"It's not in my nature to run," she said simply. "My decisions aren't your responsibility, Rinn. Not in this world. Not in any other."

The despair faded for a moment as Rinn shot daggers at her. "Don't give me that shit," she snapped then dropped her gaze. "You have the liberty to make my decisions for me all the time. And you're not the one whose idiot friend is going to die because of her. Damn it!" She swept her hand across the counter, sending a stack of tin plates flying. Helena flinched at the sound, but was careful to keep her pose. When she was sure that Rinn wasn't going to say anything else or do anything she tried to smile.

"Onkruid vergaan nooit," she said, trying to keep her voice amused, but Rinn wasn't having any of it. She stared at the fallen plates with a look of sullen anger and didn't look up to meet her gaze. Helena, unsure of what to do or say, realising that she should probably reach out and touch her or something, hesitated and shrugged.

"Rinn, when I die, you can be mad," she said. "If we both live, well… Then you can be grateful."

When her friend looked at her again, there was a weight in her eyes that Helena didn't like. "You go, I go," Rinn said, her voice suddenly devoid of emotion. "That seems to be the way of it then."

The words didn't sit well with her either. Helena made her usual considering sound and shuffled her feet, aware suddenly of the throb on her face. "Told you," she said. "I'm not going to go. That's not the way this story works." She sniffed and shrugged. "Seeing as how we're in a self-insert and all." She looked up at Rinn again, who was still unhappy, but there was no changing that. "I told you Rinn, I'm not your responsibility. And your fatalistic attitude won't work with me. We're going to fight this. All the way. Now. Do you want me to look at your leg again?"

"No," Rinn said shortly. "Not now." She hesitated. "How's your face?"

The fight seemed to be at an end for now.

Helena grimaced, but tried to smile. "I'll confess I haven't been decked like that in a while," she said. "It's… puffy. Is it blue? What does it look like?" Vanity was always a good excuse.

Rinn gave her a critical look and sighed. "It's not blue yet but it's going to be. You…" She started to say something, probably – _you should've run_ – but decided against it. "Don't look any worse than usual," she tried to joke, then took a breath. "Hungry?"

Helen grinned, happy that the fight was over. "Always," she said. "Let's see what they have to offer…"

* * *

**There was a strange level of intensity in Rinn's gaze as she looked at Helena**** across the space between them****, her green eyes seemingly following the rhythm of the other woman as she slept.** Kelly watched her from a distance, trying to piece together what the emotions were. There was guilt there, she could see that quite clearly and she suspected that she knew the source. Helena had stayed behind in the mine, because her friend would not have made it out in time. She had had a shot, but didn't take it – despite what Rinn said to her. And, in that she, could see other emotions: Anger, disappointment. They weighed in her eyes like a cloak, covering whatever relief she also felt over having her friend with her.

_She's wondering if it will happen again,_ Kelly thought as she shifted and glanced at Dr Chakwas who was sitting by her desk. _She's realised that she can't control Helena's actions. Not even in matters that are important to her._

Satisfied that she had seen enough, she moved forward, taking note of the empty plate next to Rinn's bed. She was eating at least. When she was close to the bed, Rinn broke away her gaze and turned around surprised and alert, that wildness of the mines still touching her gaze.

Kelly acted quickly, smiling at her immediately. "Good afternoon," she said warmly. "I'm sorry for startling you."

Rinn looked awkward and seemed to take a moment to assess not just her, but debate the time. "Good... afternoon," she said hesitantly. "It's okay. How're you doing?"

Liking that she had allowed the conversation to continue with her question, Kelly smiled. "I'm good," she said and held out her hand. "My name is Kelly Chambers, I'm Shepard's assistant. You're Rinn, right?"

The dark haired woman looked awkward, but carefully took her hand, her large hand's grip firm. She didn't reply, but nodded. She smiled awkwardly, seeming embarrassed.

"That's good," Kelly said with a smile. "I'd have looked really inefficient if I got it wrong. I..." There was a shift behind her as Dr Chakwas pushed away her chair.

"Yeoman," she said, drawing their attention. "I need to take some samples to Prof. Solus, do you mind staying here for a moment?"

Kelly glanced back at her briefly to nod at the doctor. "Not at all, ma'am," she said and turned to Rinn. "Unless our guest objects?"

Rinn replied by blushing and shaking her head. The good doctor smiled at her patient in a way that told Kelly she found the younger woman's embarrassment endearing. "Tell Helena there's food for her if she wakes up," Chakwas told her. "She hasn't touched anything yet. I'll see you two in a moment."

They both watched Dr Chakwas leave, not saying anything until the door closed. Kelly pulled a chair closer and turned back to Rinn. She sat down and continued speaking before the silence became awkward.

"If you want or need anything to keep yourself busy here, you must tell me," she said conversationally. "I can get you anything from music to a few vids to watch. Oh and reading material. Would you like something to read?"

Still awkward and not quite looking at her, Rinn shrugged. "Some music would be nice," she said. "And... news. From Earth. And the rest of the galaxy... That would... be nice."

Kelly smiled and held out her hand. "Give me your omnitool," she said. "I'll link you up to our intra- and extranet. That would also allow me to link you up with the crew database." Rinn stared at her for a full minute before she seemed to realise that she had to do something. She first fumbled for her arm, then paused and turned back to the bedside table. She awkwardly took the device and gave it to Kelly. It was quite new and the yeoman wondered whether they had gotten it at the mine.

"Have you had anything to eat yet?" she queried as she began to fiddle with it. "Were you alright with what they gave you?"

Rinn nodded and glanced at the empty plate beside her bed. Kelly glanced at it and smiled. "I'm also the person to tell if you have any special dietary needs," she added. "If there's anything you don't eat, let me know. We'll be stopping in Omega soon so we can make sure that we resupply with the right ingredients."

She watched as Rinn shrugged, considering the statement. "I don't have any allergies. With food I mean. It... I'm fine."

Kelly nodded and gave her back her omnitool. "There, I've linked you to our extranet, that should give you general access to whatever servers we can access from where we are." She made a vague motion with her hand, keeping her tone light. "I should just warn you that all communications are monitored. If you want to contact anybody, just be aware of that. It's standard procedure. You've probably been asked, but is there anybody that we can contact for you?"

Smiling sadly, Rinn glanced at Helena and shook her head. "It's just her," she said softly. "There's nobody else."

The woman had said it with so much conviction that Kelly knew it was the truth and the honesty in it made her sad. She had quite an extensive family and trying to imagine not having them as a support system, made her feel very empty.

"Right," she said. "I've also given you limited access to some of the folders on our intranet. That should give you access to the music and vids the crew had put into the collective. I should warn you, they are all consenting adults and our pilot is quite colourful, so I take _no_ responsibility for what might be available. You have been warned." She smiled and was encouraged to see that Rinn smiled back though her demeanour was still awkward.

"I'll bear that in mind," she said, her light green eyes waiting. Kelly weighed her gaze for a moment and then decided to take the plunge.

"I have something else I want to discuss with you," she said, glancing at Helena to see if she had woken up yet to break the privacy that she and Rinn momentarily had. When she turned back to Rinn, she could see that the statement had made her awkward and she had pulled her robe over her arms to hide her hands.

"About what?" she queried, crossing her arms over her chest.

Kelly made sure to keep on smiling as she held up her hands in defence. "Don't be alarmed, but I'm also the ship's councillor."

Strangely enough, it didn't seem to faze Rinn at all and she actually smiled. "Uh oh."

Taken aback by her lack of surprise, Kelly fumbled a bit. "I know," she said trying to keep her tone light. "It's a disaster." Rinn snorted in amusement. "I'm in constant danger, having to do psyche profiles on everybody. I mean, we have a _krogan_ on board. And your friend."

Rinn wasn't smiling, but her eyes were still held humour, if they were a little bit more distant. "I'd rather try my luck with the krogan," she said dryly, glancing at her friend. "If I were you."

Kelly felt a touch of trepidation, wondering how her conversation with Helena would go. It was important to have her cooperation as she held so much sway over Rinn. "So I've been told," she said and glanced at the ginger again to make sure she was still asleep. "Would you be willing to answer a few questions, Rinn? Just... Fill in a general questionnaire?"

It took the woman a few seconds to consider her answer. "Sure," she said finally, though she didn't sound sure at all. Kelly took the opportunity to hand her a datapad.

"You don't have to answer anything you don't want to," she said. "It's quite long and boring, I'll come and get it later." Rinn was very careful when she took the datapad and immediately put it down on her lap.

"I'll do it now," she said. "Or... as quickly as possible."

"Thank you," Kelly said with genuine gratitude. "Would Helena be willing to do the same, you think?"

Again, the amusement returned to Rinn's features, making her ears lift even though she didn't actually smile.

"Try the krogan first."

Kelly couldn't help herself, she had to laugh. "Is she that bad?"

Rinn smiled at her and then glanced at her friend. Her eyes softened and she sighed. "She's that private," she said softly. "You don't learn about her by asking questions. At least, not if you expect she'll answer you earnestly. And she doesn't trust Cerberus." She paused, her features becoming more distant and harder. "Neither of us do. There's very little reason for her to humour you."

_And she humours a lot of people, I take it?_ Kelly wanted to say, but didn't, choosing to nod instead. "I respect that," she said. "Is there any reason for it?"

Rinn blinked at her. "For not trusting _Cerberus?_" Her tone of voice almost made Kelly flinch and she tried to hide it with professional distance.

"I confess some of the projects have been a bit extreme," she confessed, thinking about Akuze. "But we are a pro-human organisation. I don't agree with everything they do. But I do believe in this mission."

Kelly was happy to realise that Rinn didn't look ready to just deny what she was saying. Instead, she seemed to spend some time thinking through her words and decide what she wanted to say.

"There have been many groups in the world that I've encountered that are pro-something," she said finally, thoughtfully, taking the time to pronounce her words carefully. "Mostly, it's pro-themselves at any cost." She looked down, glanced at Helen again and then back to Kelly. "The moment the world revolves around you, is the moment you lose perspective... Cerberus lost it the moment it was established." She paused and considered her words for another moment. "From what I understand of your mission... Ka..." She started to say Shepard's name with a familiarity that gave Kelly goosebumps and then quickly rephrased. "Commander Shepard is the driving force," Rinn finished a bit embarrassed. "She has no sense of self like others do. That's the difference." She looked away from Kelly and carefully picked up the datapad, running a trembling finger over its edge.

_Big statement to make about someone you don't know._

Kelly hid her suspicion with a smile, nodding as she spoke. "It takes a very special kind of person to be who the Commander is," she pointed out. "Don't let the logo on the uniform fool you. She's more at odds with the Illusive Man than not. We work for her, not she for us."

Rinn features were softer when she nodded and again glanced at her friend, her eyes a bit sadder. "I guess you didn't give her other options in the line of an officer's uniform that didn't have your brand on it," she pointed out. "If you had, I bet you she would've worn that instead."

Kelly smiled, but found herself wondering how it was that Rinn could speak with such certainty about Katelyn. Nobody could run a more thorough search than EDI, but she wondered whether the AI would have considered going through information and vids of Katelyn's past first.

"That she would've," Kelly said before the silence became too long. "I have nothing but the highest respect for her. She's an incredible person." _Finding some mutual ground..._

Her statement truly seemed to fascinate Rinn. "What draws you to her the most?" the dark haired woman asked, her curiosity clear.

Kelly raised her brow and considered the question for a moment. "Her compassion," she replied finally. "She cares about the people under her. Takes their lives in the highest regard. A someone who... likes people as well I can relate to that the most."

Rinn blinked at her and bit her lip in a sure sign that she was trying to suppress her amusement. The look made Kelly blush immediately and she smiled embarrassed. "What?" she stated. "I like people. I'm a people person."

Her reply somehow made things worse and the woman was having to put a huge amount of effort into keeping her amusement hidden and she was failing horribly. Kelly could only look at her for a moment. _What has she heard already?!_

"Well," Rinn said slowly, trying to keep her voice level and serious. "In your line of work... That's definitively a benefit."

Kelly gave her a look. _That scale itch wasn't my fault... _She decided to change the subject, smiling as she did so.

"So, how did you and Helen meet?" she queried. "Known each other long?"

Rinn's mirth vanished, but she didn't stop smiling, which told Kelly that the conversation wasn't that difficult for her to have. She considered her answer, always so careful with her words.

"We... sort of stumbled over each other..." she said finally. "A couple of years ago. We... work well together since we're so different. You'd think that would be the opposite but..." She fumbled, embarrassed. "But we sort of have the same code. Just..." Her gaze darkened a bit. "Not... I mean, we don't always agree but yeah." She fidgeted and looked away from Kelly to her friend's back. Helena's breathing hadn't changed at all and her body appeared relaxed enough for Kelly to judge that she was still asleep.

Kelly turned back to Rinn and smiled at her, hoping to encourage the conversation if only to understand more of the dynamics between the two women.

"So you're very different kind of people with the same morals maybe?"

Rinn shifted awkwardly and shrugged, her hands finding the blanket and rubbing it between her fingers. "I don't know how to explain it," she whispered. "I think it's like... Not quite even yin and yang... Just... Lena's more eloquent. Faster..." She started to motion to her head. _Smarter,_ Kelly supplied to her and felt sad suddenly. She got the feeling that Rinn considered herself second to Helena.

She let the moment stretch for a moment and in that time, Rinn's eyes suddenly brightened and she pointed to her friend.

"INTJ," she supplied then motioned to herself. "ISTJ, but very close to feeling." She gave a brief smile as if proud she found and adequate description. "A lot more of a feeler though..." she frowned. "I... don't know if that means anything to you..."

Kelly had to think for a moment, then remembered one of her early psych lectures. "Myers and Briggs model," she said finally. "Interesting. I know about it. It was a... good foundation." She gave her a curious look. "Interesting that you should know about it."

Rinn blushed and looked down, shifting carefully on the bed. "We found this old test once, we were just curious." She shrugged. "Got some material on it. Descriptions. Taught us a lot." She looked embarrassed suddenly as if she was considering if she had said the wrong thing.

Kelly decided to underplay it and pushed herself up from her chair when she heard the door opened behind her. A quick glance showed Dr Chakwas coming back into the infirmary. She smiled at the doctor, then turned back to their patient.

"I guess I have to get going," she said with a smile. "But thanks for talking to me, Rinn."

The woman was still looking somewhat uncomfortable, but smiled at her and nodded, not quite looking up and meeting her gaze. On impulse, Kelly found herself reaching out and taking the woman's hand, feeling the way her fingers trembled on the blanket. In her mind, she could see how Rinn had shouted at Helena to leave the mine.

"Rinn," Kelly began. "I heard about what happened in the mine." Rinn's hand started suddenly and her light green eyes shot up to meet Kelly's. The amusement and humour was completely gone and in its place the dark fear that Kelly suspected she had felt in the depths of that hell hole. "When you tried to get out... I think what you did for her... It's..." She wondered how one would describe such a selfless act. "It was an amazing show of friendship and character. You say that she's more eloquent but... I think that what you are is a lot more special. I admire that. You are very brave."

She could immediately tell that Rinn was struggling to contain her emotions. Her hands were shaking now, not just trembling. Kelly began to sit down, then saw the wild fear that Rinn eyes when she realised what she wanted to do. The yeoman decided to stay up.

"It..." Rinn began finally, realising that she had to say something. "Nothing brave about it. It was just..." She looked at Helen and the desolation in her eyes almost made Kelly start crying herself. "Just logical. She could've gotten out. She..." Rinn's eyes touched the bandage that peeked out underneath Helena's hospital robe. "She didn't."

Rinn bit her lip and her hand tensed as if she wanted to draw it away from Kelly. The yeoman didn't let go immediately, but waited to see if Rinn was willing to say anything else. Perhaps feeling that the silence had to be filled, Rinn took a quick breath. "You wouldn't' have wanted someone to die because of you. There's no bravery in that."

The way she stated it was almost dissociated, as if she was trying to justify her actions in such a way that made it sound as if everybody would've been able to make the same choice that she had made. Kelly, who had spoken to a lot of people, knew that wasn't true. She squeezed Rinn's hand.

"A lot of people wouldn't have wanted to die alone," she pointed out softly and finally let go of her hand. "Rinn, if you want to talk about it, you can always call me. Sometimes it helps to... say things out loud. Get it out of your head. I am here."

The woman nodded, but Kelly could immediately see that, unless she made some work of it, Rinn would not take her up on the offer. She sighed and patted the woman's shoulder. Then, looking at Dr Chakwas who was studying them, she inclined her head and left the infirmary.

* * *

**The one thing she did envy Shepard was that her quarters were far removed from the rest of the crew.** Miranda stood in the entryway, listening to the steady hum of the engines that seemed to be more prominent here than on the crew deck. The reason she suspected was quite simple. On the third level there was always commotion, the type that came with a group of people sharing a small space. She was fortunate to have her own room, but even her time on the Lazarus station had not prepared her for the close-quartered living of a fleet ship.

She was early for her meeting with Shepard, but had told EDI not to call the Commander. She liked the silence of the space between Shepard's room and the elevator. It was empty and private and she liked to gather herself before speaking to the commander. After her sister, that had become almost a requirement. The danger of Kate asking her a personal question was always there. The woman had seen her very vulnerable and she was worried that it might affect their working relationship.

But Katelyn was nothing if not professional.

And kind.

Miranda closed her eyes and took a deep breath, savouring the solace of the moment. It didn't last long as the door opened. It startled her and she whirled around to see Katelyn standing in the doorway, looking at her with a touch of puzzlement.

"Miranda," she said slowly.

Flustered, but trying not to show it, Miranda straightened. "Shepard," she said quickly. "I apologise if I have disturbed you. I told EDI I'm willing to wait."

She couldn't place the emotions on Katelyn's features, who shook her head and stepped out of the way. "No, it's alright Miranda," she said mechanically. "Come in."

Wondering if Shepard had been sleeping, Miranda nodded at her and stepped through, feeling awkward. _I should just have come on time, then I wouldn't have caught her off guard. Bloody AI. _She looked to Katelyn's bed and saw that the sheets were ruffled, though not open. She imagined Katelyn taking a quick nap and felt even more awkward, remembering the conversation that she had witnessed from her quarters. She had to resist the urge to ask Katelyn about it, but didn't know what the commander might think of their spying. Something caught her eye and, when she turned to look at Katelyn's ships, she was surprised to see that the little Kodiak had been taken from its position. She wondered whether it had fallen off, but followed Katelyn silently down to the sofas at the bottom. Usually the commander offered her something to drink, but tonight Shepard simply sat down.

"So what's the status of the IFF?" she queried. It was the same question that she had been asking ever since they managed to get the piece of equipment. The realisation that travelling through the Omega-4-Relay was within reach, seemed to lay heavily on the crew's thoughts. Yeoman Chambers had told her that a lot of the crew members felt anxious, but for herself, Miranda couldn't help but feel relieved. _This_ was why she was there, _this_ was their mission. While recruiting some of the other crew members, Miranda couldn't help but feel that they were drifting around aimlessly. Now, they were one step closer to ending all of it.

_And we won't fail. Katelyn won't let us fail._

"There are no new developments, Commander," Miranda said, pushing a report towards Kate. "Engineer Daniels wrote that up. They are being very thorough with their testing before they try and install the equipment."

Katelyn took the datapad, but didn't look at it immediately. "I have no problem with that," she pointed out calmly. "We need to reach the Collector's base alive, otherwise there's no point to us going through the relay." She spoke the sentence as if she had said it to herself many times before and it struck Miranda that Katelyn sounded very tired.

"That's my feeling as well, Commander," Miranda confirmed, lest Katelyn thought she was becoming impatient. She pushed another datapad over. "I have a list here from Gardner of what we need to purchase from Omega. Mordin requested some lab supplies which I have pre-approved though I don't know how much we'll get. You can have a look at it and just confirm that it's alright." She hesitated. "You said that Samara approached you with the request to travel there?"

Katelyn was very careful with her nod. "Samara's had a break in her hunt for the fugitive she was chasing in Nos Astra," the commander said. "Word is she is in Omega." Sensing that there was more to it Miranda waited, but Katelyn didn't say anything else about the mission. "The Normandy can stock up while we're tracking her down."

_Her. Probably an asari._

"Do you require any help?" Miranda asked.

Kate hesitated and then slowly shook her head. "No," she said. "We'll be fine on our own. I think Samara would've taken this matter on by herself if she could."

Thinking that she hadn't spent nearly enough time with the justicar to get a feel for her, Miranda raised an eyebrow. "She anticipates trouble?" she queried, watching Katelyn's reaction. The commander considered her words for a moment then frowned, shrugging as she did so.

"Well, she's been hunting her for four-hundred years," she mused. "I think in all that time they must've come in conflict at least once. With Samara being as powerful as she is... this murderer must be highly skilled."

_Yet, there is still more to it,_ Miranda thought, but nodded. "I'll be on alert if you require assistance," she said, watching as Katelyn nodded in acceptance. She waited for her to say anything else, but the commander was very stoic. Feeling a little bit frustrated, Miranda thought that the conversation was about as easy as picking up dry rice on a spilled carpet with chop sticks.

"Commander," she began. "If this is a bad time for you please tell me, I can come later."

Katelyn had the grace to look embarrassed as she shifted. "No," she said and Miranda could feel for the first time that she had her full attention. "No, of course not." She took a deep breath and sat forward. "Besides stocking up, is there anything that I need to be aware of? How're our guests doing?"

Satisfied and happy that Katelyn brought up the subject, Miranda shook her head to the first question. "Nothing more than the usual," she said. "As to our guests..." She paused, thinking of Helena and the way she had so easily thrown Katelyn. She wondered if the woman's accusation had caused the slight lapse in Katelyn's conversation. The commander had certainly been upset when she left the infirmary.

"Concerning their physical injuries, both are in the clear. I don't expect that either will take a sudden turn for the worse, all they need to do now is recover. Kelly's with them in the infirmary doing a preliminary evaluation."

Katelyn appeared to be considering what she had said.

"Psych evaluation," she murmured, referring to Kelly. "Good."

Miranda paused, thinking about her conversation with Helena. "But I am concerned, Commander."

Her attention returned to Miranda. "What's the concern?"

Miranda had to take a deep breath and organise her thoughts. From a practical point of view, she felt that the two women were no threat. They were injured and could be monitored constantly. But her concern stemmed from the effect that she had seen them have on Katelyn. It was a difficult subject for her, because she wasn't a natural feeler. She needed facts to back up her arguments and with this she felt as if she was going on intuition alone.

"Their intentions," she said finally. "I don't trust them, Kate. There's something not quite... right about all this."

She could tell immediately that Katelyn was going to be resistant towards the idea. "There's not much they can intend, is there?" the commander pointed out. "It's not like they made their way onto the ship on purpose."

Miranda nodded but pushed forward, watching Katelyn's features. "Yes, but if their intentions were completely innocent, they'd be more willing to cooperate with us," she pointed out. "I had a conversation with Helena before coming here. She claims to have no formal schooling, yet she was able to use the term 'Equal Matter Conversion' without flinching. And Rinn, claiming you have never met her. Do you believe her?"

Katelyn frowned and shook her head. "No," she murmured with conviction. "I don't. But there might be more than one reason to their secrecy – whether we understand it or not. It might be a personal concern, not an intended strike against us."

_Naïve_, Miranda thought, but quickly dismissed it. She had come to realise that _this_ was a part of Katelyn's makeup, her willingness to help others and first believe the best in them. _Even after what Helen said to you?_

"Be that as it may, Commander," she said carefully. "We have to watch them, possibly find an alternative arrangement. They are injured and would both require extensive follow up treatment. We cannot provide them with that here."

Katelyn was quiet, unable to argue with her logic. "I hear what you're saying," she said finally and she sounded reasonable enough, but her tone was very sharp. "Cerberus is not an option however, Miranda. I'm willing to work with them, but I'm not handing these two over to them. We'll find an alternative. Perhaps Mordin will be able to help with that."

_You don't train a devil to fight a devil._

It was a better answer than Miranda had expected, having thought that the commander would resist completely. She nodded, but didn't drop her pose, knowing that the two still had a few days on the ship regardless.

"Of course, Commander," she said. "Dr Chakwas can also speak to her contact at Huerta. There are organisations that help freed slaves or..." She paused, wondering how it was best to describe the two. "People like them."

Katelyn met her gaze and her features softened slightly. "Miranda," she said softly, her tone kinder than it had been before. "My reticence about Cerberus does not extend to you. I want you to know that." Surprised, Miranda blinked, but before she could comment, Katelyn continued. "We still have time to help them; to find some place where they'll be helped. In the meantime, we do what we can. As much as we can."

Miranda nodded, but wasn't quite satisfied. She made to get up, then hesitated. "Commander," she said softly then realised that using the woman's title wasn't quite right. "Kate... Don't get involved."

She did not like the way Katelyn suddenly looked at her – not because the woman appeared angry at her statement, but because she seemed _pleased._ As if Miranda had done something she hadn't expected, but she _liked_ it. There was almost a smile on her lips as she motioned for her to continue.

"Speak your mind," she said softly and the attention in her eyes made Miranda shiver.

"I have a..." Miranda began, but under that green gaze could not finish her sentence. "Kate, I'm not normally this fanciful, but I have a bad feeling about them. Or... Not them but... It's too easy to get involved. They were helpless, one tends to want to help to make up for what they went through. Don't let them exploit that and your good will. You're a better person than I am. Don't let them abuse that."

Katelyn was silent for a long time and Miranda began to worry that she had said the wrong thing when Shepard inclined her head slightly, acknowledging and accepting what she had said. Yet, Miranda did not like what she told her next.

"I can't say I'm not going to get involved," Katelyn said, sounding embarrassed and a little defensive. "I can't explain why, Miranda. I wish I could. It's..." She shook her head and looked down at her hands, studying them intently. "It's important to me that we get them somewhere safe. They've been dealt a terrible hand. If they can't go back to innocence then..." Katelyn cut herself off and changed direction. "What are we fighting the reapers for, if not for such as them? They were in that mine alone against an overwhelming force. If ever there was an analogy of this galaxy and the reaper threat, there it is." When she saw the look in Miranda's eyes her features softened a bit. "I know what you're warning me against and I know that we don't owe them anything. But that's also the same thing they're saying. And I think they're just as unsure of us as we are of them." She took a deep breath and smiled at Miranda. "I value your opinion and I take your concern into consideration." The smile became kinder as if they were two friends sharing a secret. "I know you're looking out for me. And I appreciate it."

Miranda felt her insides turn as she looked at Kate and was very careful not to show any of her emotions. _She's already made them her war,_ she thought. _There will be no turning her back now..._

She hesitated and sighed. "I'll keep an eye on the situation, Katelyn," she pointed out. "Is there anything else that you require from me?"

Katelyn shook her head and said in a quieter tone of voice. "No, thank you, Miranda."

Knowing that she was being dismissed, Miranda got up. She resisted the urge to salute and simply inclined her head. Then, she went up the stairs, the gap of the Kodiak once again catching her eye. She paused, looked at it where it lay on the table, the tightness in her stomach becoming almost painful, before she sighed and left the room completely.


	8. Chapter 7

**Chapter 07**

**It was Chakwas who woke her and Helena had to confess that she hadn't handled it with much grace.** At first she thought that it was a husk that was ready to grab her when she felt something touch her arm and _then__,_ as she puzzled out that it was Chakwas, the woman insisted that she eat something.

Neither of those actions went down well and Helena, still half groggy with sleep, found herself staring at her plate not relishing the smell of pork sausages and eggs. She was off the oxygen line and the constant discomfort in her back told her that Chakwas had decreased the pain medication's dose.

Which was _fine__,_because it allowed her to think a little bit clearer_._ But it didn't help with her temper.

She poked at the eggs and sighed, glancing at Rinn who was lying on the other bed to her right. They had not spoken to each other since Katelyn left them the night before. Helena had tried to fight the urge to apologise for something she knew she had not done wrong. And the truth was that she had fallen asleep again, awakened occasionally when Chakwas or her nurse checked up on her.

Rinn was quiet, fiddling with her omnitool, but she seemed listless and her concentration was obviously not on what she was doing. Helena, who gave up on trying to make herself touch the eggs, pushed the plate away and focused on her friend, studying her movements. She began to get the impression that Rinn was in pain and it had nothing to do with the injury on her leg. Unable to stand the silence in the infirmary anymore, Helena cleared her throat.

"Hey," she said, trying to get her friend's attention. "What are you doing?"

She could tell by the way Rinn paused that she had heard her, but her friend didn't answer immediately. She swallowed, sighed and finally, without looking at Helena, ventured a reply.

"Just..." Her voice sounded hollow. "Messing around... Finding out..." She motioned to her omnitool. "Finding out how it works."

Feeling uncomfortable by the lack of emotion in her friend's voice, Helena shifted and looked around the infirmary. Chakwas was there working on her station, but for the moment she seemed to be ignoring them. Legion was still there, she doubted whether they would ever have the priviledge of talking to each other without him. She sighed and realised that she was going to risk Rinn saying something if only to hear how her friend was _really_ doing.

"You okay?" she asked and again Rinn paused at her voice. She shifted and sighed, putting down her arm and turning off the omnitool.

"Yeah," she said. "I'm okay." She hesitated and looked as if she didn't want to continue the conversation. "You?"

_We can do this all day,_ Helena thought. _I can tell her that I'm fine, that I'll be okay. But – it won't get me anywhere with her. With __Rinn__, emotions are give and take._

She grimaced and looked at Legion. "I don't..." she began and dropped her voice, hoping not to attract Chakwas's attention. "...feel well today. I hurt." She felt silly and sighed, deciding to be as honest as she could be. "Feel a bit scratchy about things honestly." It was the best way to describe it. The unease she felt in her chest, the pain that had nothing to do with her shoulder.

_What lay at the heart of it__?_ she thought. _Guilt. Relief. The realisation that we're safe__,__ but we're fucked anyway..._ _Katelyn Shepard __is__ going to become indoctrinated and neither__ Rinn __nor __I__ know how that will end for the galaxy..._

Her friend looked at her concerned. "Scratchy how?" she asked, gaining a little bit more life in her eyes. "Should we call...?" She didn't say the woman's name but looked at Chakwas.

Helena looked at her for a full minute and sighed, hating herself for wishing that her friend was a little bit sharper sometimes.

"No no," she said finally and held up her good hand. "It's okay. It's not that. It's a figure of speech." _Why can't you just say it__,__Helena__? Why can't you just tell her that you're scared?_ "So, what have you learned?" She didn't really want to know about omnitools, but it seemed like the only conversation her friend was comfortable with.

Rinn stared at her and suddenly looked embarrassed. Helena saw how the realisation of what she had meant sunk in. She struggled with herself, and Helena let her, knowing that Rinn would speak when she was ready.

"What is it?" Rinn asked finally, softly; her eyes telling Helena that she might be scared of the answer. "I mean... Or..." She blew out a sharp breath and her frustration was palatable. "Y'know..."

_She was trying,_ Helena thought and braced herself against her own emotions. She made sure that her voice was calm, distant, trying to spare _herself_ the horror of what she had seen in the past couple of days.

"I'm trying to process everything," she said honestly and had to stop herself from snorting. "I know we should feel lucky..." _Lucky?_ She had to struggle to keep a sudden flare of anger in check and instead tried to find a communal line of thought with her friend. "It doesn't feel that way."

She waited, seeing the look of dismay that entered Rinn's features. Her friend looked down to her leg and sighed. "I don't know what to feel," she breathed, her words spoken without hesitation. _She's been thinking about it._

Helena tried to shift herself so that she could have a better view of her friend. "What do you feel?" she asked softly, trying to place the emotions in her friend's eyes. She was surprised by the amount of anger she noticed.

"Nothing," Rinn said finally. "And everything. Too many things. Nothing fits." She sat up and looked at her. "How's your back?"

_The husk bearing her to the ground, Rinn shouting, pulling it from her..._ Helena closed her eyes for a moment and took a sharp breath, mentally shaking away the image.

"Healing I hope," she said dryly. "I'm on less medication."

Rinn nodded and sighed, the silence spreading around them again. _What's wrong with her?_ It was a silly question. Helena could have picked a number of reasons for her friend's attitude, all of them perfectly legitimate, but still.

"Your leg? Is it alright?"

Rinn looked at it and then nodded. "It's holey," she said softly and grinned, seeming to find the statement amusing. The moment didn't last long before her expression became serious again. "It's okay." She turned to back to Helena and studied her, her green eyes scrutinizing, but not quite as accusing as it had been in the mine.

_We haven't really talked since then,_ Helena thought and wished that there was some way that they could have some privacy. _Not while we're on this ship._ She saw Rinn take a deep breath as if she wanted to say something, but the woman's courage didn't last long enough for speech. Aching, Helena tried to give her a gentle smile.

"What is it, Erinn?"

Rinn flinched at the use of her full name, but it seemed to give her some strength to speak her mind. "We came off light," she whispered. "Just by being alive. We should've..." she interrupted herself, shut her eyes and shook her head. "I'm..." There was a distinct edge in her voice this time and Helena could hear her voice catch. She didn't say anything else. Instead she kept her eyes lowered, her hands digging into the blanket over her, clearly struggling with her emotions. Helena wished that she could get up and go to her, but had the sense not to move. With effort, she'd have been within reaching distance, but when Helena tried to move her right arm, she found that it was almost completely immobile.

_Damn it,_ she thought, her own frustration building inside her. _So close yet..._

She looked around her, saw her breakfast stuff and pulled out the serviette that had come with it. Scrunching it into a ball, she tossed it over to Rinn's bed, startling her. Her friend jumped slightly when it landed on her lap and turned a surprised look to her with glassy eyes.

"Arm's too short," Helena said, trying to keep her tone light and comforting. "Comforting projectile it has to be."

Rinn looked at her, her hand inching towards the piece of paper. There was a little bit too much force in the way she grasped it, but her eyes were lighter when she nodded.

"Thank you," she said softly and took a deep breath, motioning to her food. "You should eat..." Her eyes danced over the sausages. "Ag kak, I... forgot to tell Kelly that you're a vegetarian."

Helena blinked. "Kelly?" she asked as if not knowing who that was. _She was here?_

Rinn shifted, looking down to the blanket again. "The yeoman," she said. "Eat the eggs at least, Lena. I can't remember the last time you ate."

_In the mine,_ Helena thought as she stared at the yellow mess on her plate. _That was days ago._ She smiled at Rinn and made and effort to pick up the now cold piece of toast. She'd have felt better if they had given her some coffee with it, but the doctor had told her that she wasn't to have any stimulants till she ate something decent. Rinn watched her nibble on the piece of bread and nodded her head slightly as if in thanks. Then, she sighed and settled back as Chakwas got up without saying anything and left the room. Helena wished that it would have given them the privacy that they needed, but she knew that it was futile.

The time for talking had been in the mine when they were on their own and they had wasted it by saying more to each other than was needed to.

_Are we broken? _Helena thought. _Did that last spurt to stay alive break us?_

* * *

**Omega never seemed to shed the grit of its initial purpose.** Whatever metal had brought people here was already long gone, but the dirt certainly remained. Or so at least it felt. They had docked there late in the Normandy's night cycle and Katelyn had sensed that Samara had barely been able to wait for her to rise before asking that they follow up on her lead. The ginger couldn't refuse, even though she had wanted to go to the infirmary to check up on their guests first.

Entering Afterlife, the two were instantly enfolded in the deep pulse of music. The throbbing seemed to take over the function of Katelyn's heartbeat as she stepped deeper into the press of bodies. She was about to push through, when Samara tapped her on the shoulder.

"Allow me, Commander," the justicar said, taking the lead. Instantly, the way was cleared for them. Those who didn't have any look of recognition on their faces seemed to sense the power of the asari and took a cue of those less ignorant. Only the occasional krogan didn't shift, but there was sufficient space to move past them without any struggle.

Samara seemed to ignore everyone, though the ginger knew that that would hardly be the case. She walked confidently with no apparent hostility. Graceful. Deadly. Everyone knew it, because on Omega, you learned to read people to survive.

Alto didn't stand in their way once they reached the steps leading up to Aria's balcony. Instead he gave a slight nod and watched them walk past before sliding back to blocking the door the moment they were through.

Part of Katelyn knew that none of this should have surprised her given what Samara was, but it was the first time that she was travelling with the asari in a non-hostile environment. Or at least, in an environment which only had the potential of violence and not where they were walking in guns blazing. She had never had the opportunity to see other races react to the justicar and, though the reactions she had seen at Nos Astra were reverent, there were hardly enough distance covered and enough people passed to realise how deep that awareness ran.

The steps led them up to the familiar room where the space was surprisingly empty except for an aide, two guards standing in the furthest corners of the room and Aria, sitting at her usual place. It seemed hardly secure. The queen of Omega would've gotten word of their approach the moment they so much as turned in the direction of the club. _So why lower the security detail?_

Aria stood smoothly and descended the few steps from her dark couch. Her eyes flitted in Katelyn's direction briefly, but then fixed on her companion.

"Justicar Samara," Aria nodded and, though she had risen and walked to them, her posture spoke nothing of submission. "I'm glad to see you were able to come so quickly."

_She knew?_ Katelyn kept her face schooled as she watched the exchange. _Aria was the informer?_

"There is little time to waste if it is in fact an ardat yakshi you have on this station," Samara answered simply.

"Oh there's no doubt of that," Aria said wryly. "It's been a couple of centuries since I've last encountered someone such as Morinth, but one doesn't forget. The body count's growing. My people noticed the pattern and informed me about a week ago."

"Which was when you contacted the Order."

Aria chuckled, "I already knew where _you_ were, Justicar." The asari finally turned to Katelyn. "Shepard," she continued and gave the commander a small nod. "Is hardly someone not to keep tabs on."

"Glad to see you care," Katelyn said.

"One needs to know when mayhem is about to be unleashed," Aria answered dismissively. "At least you've been useful, Commander. There are few with your knack for finding trouble that I can say that about."

She was about to reply when Samara cut in. "Do you have her location?" It was the closest to impatient that Katelyn had ever seen Samara.

Aria crossed her arms, shifting her weight. "No," she said simply. "What I do have is a list of victims and the next of kin of those who actually had them." She snapped her fingers and the aide stepped forward, producing a datapad.

"When has she last killed?" Katelyn asked and wondered whether it would've been long enough for the trail to go cold.

"Days," Aria replied, taking the datapad from the aide and passing it on to Samara. "A human girl. I'd suggest starting there."

"Thank you," the justicar nodded and Aria mimicked the gesture like an equal.

Katelyn again glanced at the room, then at Aria. The message the asari was sending clicked into place. She did not want a show of force when dealing with Samara, because she didn't want to treat the justicar as a threat. Her usual guards were as much there for appearance as they were for protection and, in this case, she had no need to appear impressive to someone of Samara's order.

And she didn't feel she needed protection. She was confident that she could face the justicar herself if need be. _The guards are here to watch me._ Katelyn wondered how powerful Aria _really_ was that she had no fear of Samara.

Just respect.

"I will let you know if I hear anything," Aria said. "She is still in Omega. That much I can tell you."

"If she's here, I will find her," Samara replied. "It is time for this chase to end."

The justicar gave a final nod, then turned for the door and made her exit. Katelyn remained behind for a moment, and watched as Aria arched an eyebrow at her.

"I'm surprised you sent word," the ginger commented. "Couldn't you have taken care of her yourself?"

"An ardat yakshi is not a creature you fuck around with," Aria retorted moving back up the steps to her seat. "That's for the justicars to deal with. Besides," she sat down, crossing her legs and, in Katelyn's mind, resumed her usual air of rulership. Her eyes though, held a hint of something else the commander couldn't put her finger on. "After so long, Samara deserves to make an end to this herself."

_How much do you know about her?_ Katelyn wondered and was tempted to ask. She could hear the dismissal in Aria's tone and decided not to pursue the matter. Samara was waiting.

"Maybe I'll come back later," Katelyn said, backing out.

Aria smirked at the familiar line. "And maybe I'll be here."

* * *

**Helena**** felt broken as the day progressed. **They didn't talk, but Helena could hardly blame Rinn for that. She wasn't keen on starting up any conversations either. Legion and EDI's presence loomed over her like a shadow and she constantly wondered how much was being recorded. The morning dragged and the time that she spend asleep from the medication didn't feel long enough. Her back hurt and, more than once, she considered asking Chakwas to increase her dosage again. But she didn't. The pain was also anchoring in a way. It forced her to think, to drag her thoughts away from the drug-induced dreams that she had. She was encouraged to see Dr Chakwas bid Rinn to get up out of her bed at around what she guessed to be noon and walk her around the infirmary. It was a careful balance with the good doctor barely touching her friend, but still making sure that she had enough support so as not to hurt herself. Helen envied Rinn her movement, but could also see that the action pained her. When she was done 'exercising', Rinn fell back to bed and slept like the dead.

Miranda also came and went, but they had nothing to say to each other. She helped Helen turn on her stomach and poked at her wounds for a painful ten minutes. She didn't say how they were progressing and Helena, depressed and brooding, refused to ask.

When she was done, Miranda carefully helped her sit a little upright and in such a way that she hardly had any weight on her right side. Helena had just settled and considered taking a nap herself when Kelly came into the infirmary. It was the first time that she had seen her since arriving here and Helena took a moment to study the young woman. At first glance, Kelly _really_ appeared to be likable. Her red hair was a lighter shade than Helen's own and her eyes were truly green, something Helena always secretly envied in other red heads. Her features were relaxed as she smiled at Dr Chakwas and Miranda who were standing by the doctor's table, talking in low voices. When she saw the yeoman, Dr Chakwas smiled in greeting, briefly glanced at Helena, then at Rinn.

"Kelly, do you mind staying here for a moment?" the doctor asked. "Miranda and I need to take some results to Mordin. Rinn is asleep, but Helena might need something." Helena studied the way Chakwas's smile seemed almost _too_ calm and thought to herself: Well played, doctor. Well played.

Kelly took to the chance immediately. "Of course," she said. "I was coming to see Rinn, but..." Her green eyes turned to Helena. "I don't mind who I keep company. Good afternoon."

Helena smiled at her, but didn't reply immediately. She carefully reached out to the table beside her and put her glasses back on. She had gotten a headache from using them earlier, but figured that now might be the time to get a little clarity.

Kelly came to her bed, her features open and friendly as she held out her hand. Helena managed to lift her right hand a little and took Kelly's automatically, glancing at the datapad she had slipped underneath her shoulder. _Do they work like i__P__ads?_

"I'm Yeoman Kelly Chambers," the perky red head said. "It's a pleasure to meet you. I've only ever been here when you were asleep."

Helena couldn't help herself, she had to comment. "And that does not sound creepy at all," she said dryly, watching Kelly's eyes widen in surprise then her face coloured in embarrassment. Miranda and Chakwas had already left the room, leaving the two of them with only Legion and EDI for company.

_And they think I'll just ignore the geth?_

"That came out wrong," Kelly said. "What I meant to say was, I was here last night. You were asleep, but Rinn and I spoke for a bit. And I'm afraid to say... I owe you an apology." She pulled a chair closer without asking and sat down. Helena didn't grace her with a reply, but studied her, fascinated by her ease. She had an inherent aversion to people who were too cheerful. Yet, she also admired them because she knew that she would never be able to pull off such a complete act.

When it became clear to Kelly that Helen wasn't going to reply, she shifted and smiled, bringing the datapad to her lap. It seemed important to her.

"I asked Rinn for her dietary needs," she pointed out. "But, I never thought to ask her if you have any. She didn't tell me that you're a vegetarian." She blushed and Helena wondered if it was genuine or an act. "And then they gave you sausages this morning. I'm sorry about that."

Again, Helena gave her a curious look and shrugged with one shoulder. "No worries," she said. "Nobody died."

Kelly smiled and, although she didn't show it, Helena began to worry if she was nervous about something else other than the Normandy's attempt to feed her animal matter.

"Any reason you're a vegetarian?" Kelly asked with interest. "Or is it personal?"

Sighing, Helena glanced at Rinn to see whether she had woken up yet, hoping that her friend would be able to distract the yeoman. She hated conversations with very little point and Kelly asking her about her eating habits had as much in her opinion. But, it did give them something to discuss and the woman was obviously not going to leave until Chakwas and Miranda showed up.

"Worked on a farm a few years ago," she volunteered, keeping her voice level. "Farmer had a heifer who struggled calving. The calf died while still inside the mother and the boys looking at that specific herd didn't notice." She studied Kelly's expression to see how the story would affect her but, so far, all she showed was genuine interest. Helen hesitated, then carried on. "By the time the farmer noticed, the dead calf had already started to decompose, causing an infection inside the mum. When they pulled it, the mum was already too sick to recover. And, they realised that there was a twin behind it. The farmer brought the calf to me and..." She paused suddenly the memory very vivid in her mind. She remembered the weight of the calf as the farmer gave it to her, thinking that it felt like a child... "I tried to keep it alive. Struggled for about two days, never left its side. Didn't go home. Fed it, got it to stand, slept next to it to keep it warm, but sometimes... Sometimes there's just no will to live." She felt angry as she had back then, but realised suddenly that Kelly could see it and shrugged it off, collecting herself. "After all the effort I had put into trying to keep it alive, it hardly made any sense to continue eating meat. I wasn't too keen on it anyway."

Kelly nodded looking as if she understood completely. "My sister's a vegetarian as well," she said. "She runs and animal shelter in New York. I don't think she's ever eaten meat, always told my parents that she's not going to eat something that died."

Helena looked at Kelly, not daring to show any emotion. "Fascinating," she said simply and waited, glancing at the datapad again. Kelly noticed her interest and shifted, bringing it to the bed.

"When I spoke to Rinn last night," Kelly began. "I asked her whether she'd be willing to fill in a standard assessment for me. It's a requirement for all crew members and I thought... Just for record's sake... It would be good if you two did it as well. It's just an evaluation..." She hesitated when Helena made no reply. "Would you mind?"

Not saying anything, Helena started to move her right hand to pick it up, but had to stop because of the pain she experienced. She moved her left instead, picking up the datapad, but finding that it wasn't on yet. Not wanting to show her ignorance over not knowing where to activate it, she turned back to Kelly, tapping the datapad's side.

"Evaluation of what?"

Kelly hesitated for a second as she tried to arrange her words. It was such a short interval that Helena wouldn't have noticed it if she hadn't been waiting for some kind of reaction.

"It's just a standard evaluation," she said. "About personality and a few other things. Just to evaluate mental stability, which is quite crucial on a ship like this." When she saw the way Helena raised her brow she fumbled a bit and tried to change tactics. "Rinn told me that you two are familiar with another type of model. Myers and Briggs?"

Helena's mouth thinned as she glanced at the datapad, trying to see which of the many buttons might be the magic one. "You two got real chatty," she said dryly. "Can you turn it on for me, I'm afraid I might drop it." She handed the datapad back to Kelly and watched how she wiped across the screen. _That simple huh_. The yeoman didn't hand it back to her immediately.

"Should I turn it to English?"

Helena sighed and nodded. "Might as well," she said and held out her hand again deciding that it probably did work like an iPad. She took the datapad from Kelly and glanced at the first few questions that simply wanted to know things like her name, identification and section where she worked. She wanted to flip to the next page but realised that she didn't know how. She also didn't want to try it in front of Kelly, lest the woman saw her fumble.

"Did she tell you what types we were?"

Kelly nodded and again Helena saw her hesitate. "She did," the yeoman said, trying to sound nonchalant. "I always find it interesting to know what types of personalities people have. It... tells you a lot."

Helena looked at her, but didn't say anything immediately. She glanced back at the datapad and tapped the screen, trying to see what reaction it had without making the gesture seem intentional. She noticed for the first time that her glasses even made closer images appear clearer.

_I am the very model of a scientist salarian._

Her tapping did nothing to the datapad, but when she finally shifted her finger to the side, the page turned back. _There we go._

Helena read through the page, then flipped to the first one. She scanned through the questions, grimacing as she did so. It was more of a mental health evaluation than anything else and she could pick that up immediately.

"Rinn is still sleeping," Kelly said out of the blue, having turned to look at her friend. "I heard Dr Chakwas wanted to get her to walk a bit today. How did it go?"

At page three, Helena glanced up at Kelly. She wanted to say that she should ask Legion, but sighed and leaned back a bit, putting the datapad down. "I think she's in a lot of pain," she said honestly. "I think her running on the thing didn't do it any favours." She could not stop the guilt that she felt and had to look away from Kelly despite the knowledge that the yeoman had probably already seen it. Sure enough, she heard her shift and, when Helena turned back to the datapad, Kelly was sitting a little bit closer to the bed.

"The way I understand it, there was no choice," Kelly said softly. "You had to run or..." Helena looked up meeting Kelly's gaze directly. She studied the yeoman's features trying to figure out what angle she was using.

"We spoke about the mine a little, Rinn and I," Kelly said softly. "I know what happened there. How you had stayed with her even when you had a chance to leave. It was a very brave thing to do."

Helen's anger was quick and intense. She didn't show it, but rubbed her chin, thinking about what Shepard had said the day before. _I saw you fight, I saw your fear..._

_Rinn wouldn't have discussed the elevator with her._

Her anger was so intense now, so hot that for a moment she couldn't breathe. Kelly began to realise that something was wrong and reached out to touch her.

"Are you in pain..." she began, but Helena waved her hand off, her movements tight and jerky. She took up the datapad, resisting the urge to throw it at the yeoman and pushed it across the bed to her.

"What the..." She had to collect herself, reduce her anger to a point where she could think coherently. "How many of you have seen the footage from the mine? And how did you get it? Did you download it, or did you monitor the mine before you actually bothered going in?"

Kelly blinked at her and sat back. "We were able to download some of the security footage," she said cautiously, her green eyes studying Helena. "We did it in order to find out what had happened there."

Her shoulder hurt, making Helena realise that she had moved her right arm and was clinging to the blankets, both her hands clenched into fists. She bit her tongue and relaxed them, fixing Kelly with a cold look.

"And did it give you the sufficient data that you need?" she queried, trembling. "Did it show you what you wanted to see? In how much pain Rinn was? Did you see how much it took from her to see me..." Her voice started trembling and she pulled her thoughts back a notch, still trying to control her anger. "Is that why she's so fucking quiet today? Did you try and discuss this with her?"

Kelly was still sitting as far back in her chair as she could, but her training was starting to kick in. She lowered her voice and looked Helena in the eye.

"Yes I did," she said simply. "I told her that I knew, because I feel it's good that she knows she can discuss it with someone. That she doesn't have to explain to me what happened. That I already know. You have to talk about it. You went through hell, seeing all those people die..." She trailed off when she saw Helena's anger intensify.

"You have no right," Helena said, her voice low and cold. "You have no right. None. You had no right to look at those videos. You have no right to come in here and... and try and treat us." She flicked her hand at the datapad. "To try and shrink us. And you had no right to upset my friend. None!" Her chest hurt as her heart rate increased. "What happened to us... That mine... It's private! Who the hell gave you all permission to watch that footage? Rinn told you what happened in the mine! She spoke to Katelyn about it! You don't need to know anything else!"

Kelly made to sit up a little, raising her hand. "Helena, calm down please..." she began but Helena waved her off.

"You leave her alone!" she snapped. "She has been through enough! She..."

"Lena..."

They both turned to see that Rinn had woken up and, considering how loud she had been talking, Helena wasn't surprised. She experienced a moment of schizophrenic relief and fear. Relief that she wasn't alone with Kelly anymore, yet fear that Rinn was going to see how upset she was.

How angry. She had not shown anger to her throughout the mine. She had tried so hard to keep her temper...

Kelly too was looking at Rinn. Her friend struggled to push herself up, wincing in pain as she did so. Her green eyes met Kelly's and there was no emotion in them that Helena could see.

"I think you should go," she told the yeoman softly, her voice level. "Now."

Kelly looked at her for a moment, then left the room without looking at Helena, leaving her datapad on the bed. Helena watched her go, then looked at Legion, realising that it felt... different. The geth's eye was up, looking at them.

She closed her eyes, breathing as if she had run a marathon, pressing her hand against her chest though it was actually her back that hurt. She sat like that for a long moment before Rinn stirred beside her.

"Hey," her friend said softly, trying to get her attention. Helena didn't look at her immediately, making sure that Rinn didn't see how close she was to tears. She didn't look at her as she continued to massage her chest, trying to ease out the pain.

"Did she upset you?" Helena asked softly and felt silly because she realised suddenly that it was very clear how much Kelly had upset her.

Her friend was quiet for a moment, perhaps thinking about exactly the same thing. "At this point," she said finally. "Everything upsets me." She moved, picked up something beside her bed and tossed it to Helena. The ginger watched as the white serviette landed between her legs.

_Don't get cozy there now..._

She chuckled at herself and blew out a slow breath. "I'm sorry I woke you," she said earnestly and picked up the serviette. She took of her glasses and tried to blow her nose, but the deep breath and action hurt her back so she stopped.

Rinn to her surprise chuckled softly. "I'm not," she said with conviction and glanced at the door. "I think I just saved Yeoman Kelly's life."

Helena barked a laugh, but it hurt. "Lucky her," she said and took another steadying breath, shaking her head as she did so. She noticed the datapad and shook her head again. "I don't even know what to say about that."

Rinn frowned at her and then noticed the datapad. She seemed genuinely intrigued and suddenly, a thought amused her. "She gave you one of those too? Was there a krogan in here?" When Helena looked at her in surprise, she shrugged and motioned to her own. "Pretty long and complex for something that basically asks the question 'are you insane?' They could've just asked. Or... that one would've been easier just too..." She mimicked making a correct check mark with her hand.

Calming down and grateful for her friend's silliness, Helena smiled at her, feeling incredibly stupid suddenly. _I shouldn't have lost my temper._

"Ja," she said. "Ja, that would've been easier. Simple, to the point." She swallowed and settled back a bit, the pain not completely gone, but manageable. "Are you okay?" She wondered how many times she'd ask that before she got an honest answer.

She was surprised when she did.

"I'm worried about you," her friend said softly and then sighed. "Which... isn't altogether something new. So yeah. I'm okay."

Helena almost laughed. "I don't think we will ever be okay again."

Her friend looked sad as she raised her hand into the air and made another check motion. "But we can try," she said softly. "It's all we can do."

Her words once again almost made Helena cry, but it was from relief this time. _This was why I stayed,_ she thought and closed her eyes, knowing Rinn wouldn't begrudge her any sleep. _This was why I stayed for you. You bring me back to feeling like an actual human being._

* * *

**The woman's face was lined with wrinkles and something told Katelyn that, despite her age, Diana must've aged overnight.** She had a haunted, empty look in her eyes. Hollowed out by grief. Somehow she managed to talk to them about her daughter without completely losing control, but it was still a close call. The wounds were far too recent and, Katelyn knew from experience, the major hit usually only came two weeks after a person's passing. And the woman was all alone in her apartment now. The ginger hoped that the grieving mother had at least one or two friends who'd support her in what was to come.

"It's so hard when no one believes you," Diana whispered and looked at them with some relief that she now had two people who did. "Something changed in the last couple of weeks. She started going out more, and this Morinth all but became her world. She was distracted without her. Restless. Almost as if she was addicted. I'm pretty sure she gave my Nef drugs. Maybe she was holding back on it so Nef had to come and see her. I don't know... I just don't know." Her anguish was palpable.

"I see," Samara murmured quietly. From the start of the mission, the asari had been professional. Cold and determined. But there was something that kept drawing Katelyn's eyes to her. Not exactly a chink in her armour, but _something _suggesting that her personal interest was just beneath the surface. That she was looking at this woman not as a subject to interrogate, but as a mother.

_It couldn't have been drugs that drew Nef to Morinth,_ Katelyn thought as she considered Diana's words. _This was someone who bewitched a village into worshipping her and offering their children as sacrifices._ The thought made the ginger shiver, then she looked at Samara. _And you had to kill almost all of them. How heavy does that burden not weigh on you?_

"Morinth controls through sheer will," Samara continued, confirming the commander's own speculation. "The drugs are just a lifestyle."

"So Morinth _did_ hurt my daughter? Is she the one that..." Diana's breath hitched. "That...?"

Katelyn had left the questioning to Samara, but couldn't remain silent anymore. She moved forward, passing the justicar and laid a steadying hand on the woman's shoulder, comforting and anchoring her. "I swear to you, we will deal with Nef's killer. She will not do this again. It is a small comfort, but I hope you will find some in that."

Diana subconsciously leant into Katelyn's grip and the ginger could feel the trembling of her body. _How much energy is it taking from her just to stand? Has she eaten at all?_ She stepped closer and wordlessly helped her to a nearby chair. Then she knelt by Diana, her hand locked onto the woman's arm. "But you need to promise me something," she said quietly, keeping her green eyes on the older woman. "You need to eat and drink some fluids and rest and stand up again. You need to _live_."

"But Nef was my life," Diana answered, tears finally trickling down her cheeks. "She was my life."

"Then honour your daughter's life by living for her. Draw your strength from who she was. From what you told us, she was driven and passionate. Draw from her. Live for her." _And grow strong enough to live for yourself again._

The woman nodded, wiping her tears. Katelyn squeezed her arm gently and rose. She noticed a box of tissues on a nearby table and fetched it, laying it in the woman's lap. "We will be respectful when we look through your daughter's room, I promise." Again Diana nodded wordlessly.

Katelyn turned back to Samara so they could go. The expression on the asari's face halted her. Those blue eyes studied her with such intensity, her expression unreadable. _What is she thinking? Had she wanted to ask Diana more questions? How would she have acted had I not intervened?_ A few seconds later, Samara's face became placid again and she walked to Nef's room.

The examination Katelyn also left in Samara's hands. She was the hunter, as Aria had put it, and in all her years of chasing after Morinth, her own _daughter_, she would know more what to look for than Katelyn would. _Four-hundred years. Chasing down your own blood._ The commander had tried to imagine it. Tried to imagine Thomas being a ruthless killer and having to kill him to save others; having to kill others to get to him. It was impossible. Her heart clenched at the thought.

She let her green eyes take in the bed, the sculptures and artwork not quite littered all over, but seeming to fit the artist's profile Katelyn had begun forming in her mind. Passionate. Not temperamental, but still changeable as her interests shifted. She wondered how different Nef's room was before Morinth stepped into the woman's life. A console stood close to the woman's bed and, while Samara's attention was focused on another side of the room, Katelyn stepped closer. The console yielded little about the ardat yakshi at first. It was full of music and pictures of art work, articles of artists and messages from galleries, such as Diana had mentioned. A journal folder was password protected.

'Unbridled passion', the password prompt read.

"EDI," Katelyn spoke as she activated her comms. "Can you remote link to a console and crack a password for me?"

"Of course, Shepard," the AI replied.

"I want to access the journal files," the commander said as she activated a link from the console to her omnitool. A second later the console flickered and the letters to the password appeared.

_M.0.R.1.N.7.h._

"Naturally," she murmured. "Thank you, EDI."

"My pleasure, Commander."

Katelyn accessed the logs. Nef had been consistent in her posts until a couple of weeks before her death. The messages thereafter were sporadic; their contents confessing Nef's surprise at meeting Morinth, her curiosity, her interest, her attraction, her longing, and finally her addiction to her killer.

"The VIP lounge is her hunting grounds," Samara observed quietly as Katelyn shut the console off.

"Seems like we'll have to go there then," Katelyn agreed. She turned back to her companion, keeping her distance, but wishing she could reach out and touch the asari. Her longing to bring comfort to the wounded warrior growing as they delved deeper into Morinth's world. But she couldn't make herself approach Samara. Not yet, the distance in the justicar's eyes stopping her. Instead, she walked out of the room, murmuring, "Let's go," before she exited.

Diana was still seated where Katelyn had left her, her eyes staring blankly at a spot not a couple of metres ahead of her. The commander walked forward and knelt by her again. "Nef left us information to track her killer down," Katelyn whispered. "We're going to find her, Diana."

The ginger's words seemed to reach the woman as tears began to pool in her eyes and fall. Katelyn reached forward, taking both of the woman's shoulders and squeezing them gently.

"Thank you. I'm sorry. I just... I miss her so much," she sobbed out, covering her mouth with a trembling hand.

"It's all right," Katelyn soothed and murmured. "We've all suffered loss. Grieve for her, but live for her. Promise?"

Diana nodded, too upset to speak.

"Alright," the commander whispered, then stood, the plates of her armour creaking slightly.

As she stepped back, Samara slowly approached the grieving woman. The justicar reached out her hand, then hesitated. Then, to Katelyn's surprise, she touched the crown of Diana's head.

"I too know what it means to lose a daughter," she said, her voice steady, but Katelyn thought she heard the slightest tremor in the final word. "I will avenge yours as I will my own."

The asari removed her hand and Diana looked up, her eyes wide. "Your daughter? She too?"

Samara nodded. "This creature stole both among countless others. And I will remove the stain of its existence swiftly and without mercy. That is my oath."

* * *

**Trembling as the door closed behind her, Kelly Chambers took a moment to get her breath back and shake away the emotions that she had felt**. _Boy, we have to watch that temper of hers..._ She swallowed and pushed some hair out of her face, looking up to see Dr Chakwas and Miranda come towards her, their features bearing twin frowns.

"Everything alright?" Karin asked and Kelly wondered for a moment how she should respond. She glanced back at the infirmary door and wondered if she had made a mistake leaving. Not wanting to show the two women how unsettled she was, she turned back to them and smiled.

"I think Rinn was right," she said. "Her friend's worse than a krogan with scale itch."

Karin raised an eyebrow, but Miranda frowned. "What happened?" she said and glanced at Chakwas who caught her drift and nodded.

"I'll go and check on them," she said and went back into the infirmary. Kelly watched her go, shifting out of the way so that she wouldn't be seen when the door opened. When she turned back to Miranda, the XO gave her a look and walked to her room. Kelly followed her, wishing she had a datapad or something to clutch.

_And what's a datapad going to help? You going to beat her to death with it if she decided to attack?_

She had to stop herself from grinning, realising that Officer Lawson would not appreciate her humour.

In her room, Miranda took a seat behind her desk and motioned Kelly to another. The yeoman hesitated, then carefully sat down. Miranda didn't look at her immediately, but typed in a few commands on her console and drew up the security footage from the infirmary. Kelly had to stop herself from sighing and began to realise that perhaps Helena had a point at not wanting her perceived mistakes out there for everybody to see.

Miranda watched through the footage then raised an eyebrow at Kelly, waiting for her to explain.

"As you can see," the yeoman said slowly. "My talk with Helena did not go well."

Showing no emotion, Miranda nodded in confirmation. "What happened?"

Kelly would've liked to know herself. She considered her answer, then grimaced. "I thought the conversation was going well," she said. "What I underestimated was how... touchy Helena would be over..." Miranda's mouth thinned.

"Everything," the XO provided the answer.

Kelly looked at her and couldn't help but defend the ginger. "They've been through a lot Miranda. In some ways she's right, it's not our place to go and study every second of the footage that we have, to scrutinise their mistakes. Their actions. It's clearly a difficult subject for Helena. I think she made a lot of the decisions down there. I think she perceives Rinn's injury as her fault."

Miranda studied her, then glanced back to the vid. "Did you upset her friend?"

Kelly shook her head. "No," she said. "Rinn and I had a very good session. Our communication was up front and open. I thought that I was heading down the same path with Helena, especially after she shared that segment from her past, but I was mistaken."

Miranda frowned, but it wasn't directed at her necessarily. "Kelly, they both better start cooperating with us. Shepard's charity might stretch to the end of the galaxy, but mine does not."

The yeoman had to be very careful not to respond to Miranda's tone. She glanced down at the floor, nodding as she did so. "I understand that, Officer Lawson," she said. "I realise how crucial it is to get to the bottom of who these two are and why Katelyn seems to know Rinn. I'll try and see where I went wrong. If all else fails, I'll give up on Helena and for now focus only on Rinn. I just think..." She paused to order her words in her mind. Whenever she spoke to Miranda she felt that it was crucial that she spoke sense all the time.

_Another candidate for the INTJ category right here..._

"I just think I underestimated how the two affect each other. We saw a fragment of what happened to them in the mine, a fragment of their lives. We should not judge their behaviour too harshly."

Miranda frowned, but didn't disagree with her. "Yes, but we shouldn't let their behaviour dictate ours as well," she pointed out. "I want to get to the bottom of this before they leave this ship, Chambers. And I intend for us to travel to a planet where we can do so as soon as we leave Omega. So your time is limited. Do what you can, but if you can't get anywhere, I'll oversee their questioning myself."

_And now they're to be interrogated? Dumped?_

Kelly was very careful not to show her displeasure as she pushed herself up. "Of course, Officer Lawson," she said. "I'll try to see if I have more success with Rinn. Tell me, have you heard anything of the commander yet?"

Miranda's mouth thinned and she shook her head. Kelly knew that she wasn't pleased at being left behind on the Normandy.

"No," she said simply. "They merely confirmed that the murderer is still at large on Omega. She and the justicar are going to investigate a private club tonight. Perhaps they will get somewhere."

* * *

**Katelyn's body trembled under the power of the ardat yakshi, her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth.** She couldn't back away, trapped without being so much as touched. Morinth leant forward, inhaling deeply as she brushed her cheek against Katelyn's. "Strong enough to resist, but not enough to break free," the asari's voice was husky, her breath tickling the ginger's ear. "But I've always enjoyed a challenge."

She felt Morinth's hands on her knees, creeping up to her hips. Katelyn wished she had her armour on and yet her heart leapt at the sensation. "Come now," the asari murmured as she drew her nails back down Katelyn's thighs. "Tell me how you'll kill for me. How you'll do whatever I want." Morinth kissed her, drawing her mouth open. "Beg for the ecstasy only I can give you."

It took all she could not to do just that. _Hold on_, her thoughts struggled as the asari's kisses became more insistent_. Samara will come. Hold on._ But she didn't. She didn't want to. She had felt so lonely. So lost. And now...

Katelyn gasped as Morinth straddled her, and she couldn't stop her hands from taking the asari's hips. _No. Hold on. You're not thinking straight,_ she closed her eyes and managed to turn her face away, breaking contact. She heard the ardat yakshi laugh and _loved_ the sound...

"Morinth!" Samara's voice cracked through the air. Katelyn saw blue hands coated in biotics close in on the ardat yakshi's shoulders and then Morinth was viciously thrown off her.

It was almost painful to have her break contact that way. The commander's mind felt foggy as she blinked at the two asari facing each other off. For a second, Morinth glanced at Katelyn, putting things together and the ginger felt the slightest touch of shame. Then Shepard shook herself off of it. This was why this whole thing was set up after all.

"Mother," Morinth hissed as the two battled. Shepard stood and backed away, knowing better than to interfere with the awesome display of power in front of her.

"Do not call me that!" Samara commanded and it was her tone of voice that pulled Katelyn back to reality.

_This creature stole both among countless others,_ Samara had said. _And I will remove the stain of its existence swiftly and without mercy._

"I can't choose to stop being your daughter, Mother!" Morinth shot back, the angry pulse of her biotics knocking Samara backward. "What choice do I have?" She threw a couch, just as the justicar was about to recover, knocking the older asari clean off her feet. The ardat yakshi was on her as she began to stand, a biotic punch connecting with her ribs.

"My only crime," Morinth snarled as she followed up with a blow to the head. "Was being born with the gifts you gave me." Samara countered the third strike and knocked the ardat yakshi back. Morinth landed against the window pane with a grunt. She quickly recovered and sneered, her gaze meeting Katelyn for a second before zoning back in on Samara. "I'm the genetic destiny of the asari, but they're not ready to reveal this. So I must die."

She charged forward, coated biotics, her movement almost blurred at the speed it gave her. Samara crossed her arms, throwing up a barrier strong enough to halt the humanoid bullet. "You're a disease to be purged and nothing more," she growled as she lashed out with the absorbed energy. Morinth landed on the ground in a heap as the air was knocked out of her lungs. She scampered back as best she could as she glared at her creator.

"And Rila and Falere?" she panted. "Are they also just a disease? A mistake _you_ created?" Katelyn gasped and saw Samara falter. Her pause gave Morinth the time to get back on her feet unsteadily. "Are we really the disease here, _M__other_?" She threw a wave, but Samara had enough warning to dodge it. Then the ardat yakshi gasped as the justicar biotically pulled her forward then knocked her hard into the ground.

"They were willing to fight it," the justicar said as she pinned her down.

"I am not the one who is the monster," Morinth whimpered and again Samara seemed to falter. But, then she became cold, hard and Katelyn could not help but look away.

"Find peace in the embrace of the goddess," the justicar said as she did the grizzly deed and ended her daughter's life.

The crackle of power faded in both asari instantly and Samara remained motionless, on her knees beside her daughter. Katelyn moved forward carefully, standing beside her when she finally reached out and stroked her daughter's forehead. "Find peace, Mirala." Her words were barely distinguishable.

Katelyn gripped the asari's shoulder, providing what comfort she could. Wordlessly the justicar rose and the ginger stepped back to give her space. Her crystal-blue eyes seemed darker than usual, but her face was expressionless. "I am ready to leave this place, Commander," she said, her voice also devoid of emotion.

"Samara," the ginger started, but the asari shook her head.

"Shepard, I just killed the bravest and smartest of my daughters. What can I say? There are no words." For a second, Samara's eyes glimmered then she visibly swallowed it back. "Please, show mercy on a broken old warrior and let us leave."

Katelyn slowly nodded, pushing back her own desire to provide comfort to her companion; knowing there was no way she could do so. Not there. Not at that moment.

"Let's go," she said gently, allowing Samara to take the lead, out of the apartment and off the station.


End file.
